Beware of Pride
by bonsoirlune
Summary: A P&P tale set at Brigham Young University, the college where a majority of people prefer to leave married, whose students are proud of it's 1 national ranking in the stone cold sober catagory, where the girl still wants the boy to open the door for her.
1. Author's note

Preface

Recently, I read in the policies for fanfiction that you're not supposed to have a chapter post entirely devoted to an author's note. All I can say is…oops, I promise I won't do it again.

Anyway, I've had some requests to explain some of the "Mormon jargon" I use, so here it goes…

Brigham Young University is a private college run by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (aka. the Mormons or LDS Church). It's in Provo, Utah, which is forty-five minutes south of Salt Lake City and 5 ½ hours north/northeast of Las Vegas, Nevada.

BYU has an Honor Code that people sign while applying to the school. Besides committing that you'll never cheat, you sign that you'll obey…

The dress code (no shorts above the knee, shirts must have sleeves and cover your middle, guys can't have piercings or have their hair touch their collar or go over the ears or something like that, etc.)

The curfew (no one of the opposite sex in the apartment after midnight, the curfew is later on Friday nights, no one of the opposite sex in your bedroom at all except in the dorms at a certain time with the door open)

The drinking/drug rules (stay stone cold sober and no drugs and smoking even, no coffee or tea, there is only caffeine-free soda on campus, but I don't think Coca-Cola is against the honor code)

And…it goes on.

Note: These rules apply on and off campus.

The rules might seem harsh for a college, but it's the reason why a lot of people go to BYU in the first place. The Honor Code follows the guidelines of the LDS church.

About 93% of the school is LDS. If you're not LDS, you're usually an athlete or foreign (but as always there are exceptions). BYU is a wonderful school.

Growing up you attended church with your family. The congregation that your family meets with on Sunday is called your ward. At BYU, your ward consists of just an apartment complex or an apartment complex or two and some houses and condos in the area. So…instead of going to church with your family and families in your neighborhood or city at home, you go to a ward consisting of 100+ single girls and guys between the ages of 18 and 25 (give or take a few years).

Note: Church is 3 hours long. The first hour or so is sacrament meeting (where you take the sacrament of bread and water and hear people give prepared "talks" (speeches) on an assigned topic). The second hour is Sunday School (taught out of the scriptures in a classroom setting). During the third hour the men go to Priesthood, and the women go to Relief Society.

The leaders, teachers, and speakers in the ward are all volunteers. At BYU, the leaders, teachers, and speakers are your roommates and peers except for the Bishop (the head of the ward) and his first and second counselor who are asked to leave their family wards in the area to serve in that capacity.

A group of wards make up a stake.

Every Monday night your family at home has had Family Home Evening where they meet, sing, read scriptures together, have a spiritual lesson, have some sort of activity or game and have treats. Because you don't have your family at BYU, the ward divides the apartments, condos, and houses up in to small groups that form your FHE group. A girl and a guy are asked to be the leaders of the group. They are jokingly called "Mom" and "Dad."

After they turn 19 (usually after their freshman year), guys leave for two years on a mission. There is an exceptionally low percentage of 20-year-old boys at BYU. Once they come home from their missions, it's time to get married, finish college, and get a job. A lot of guys put pressure on themselves to do it in that order, and quiet a few of them succeed.

Girls can go on an 18 month mission when they're 21 if they want to and aren't married.

Family is the fundamental unit of the LDS Church. A world wide leader in the LDS church said that, eternally speaking, success in the business world "does not make up for failure in the home." Marriage between a man and a woman is extremely important to LDS members. At BYU, where there are over 30,000 guys and girls of which there's an extremely high percentage of virgins with the same standards and religion who hold marriage in high priority, you have a twenty-first century "marriage market."

Therefore…

It is a truth universally acknowledged at BYU that a single man who has returned home from his mission must be in want of a wife.

What I've said are generalizations and probably has caused more questions than they have answered, so I recommend checking out www(dot)mormon(dot)org or www(dot)lds(dot)org.


	2. Chapter 1

Preface

Prologue

(To get some facts out of the way)

This story isn't about golf…which might sound crazy to all of you who know me.

For those of you who don't, well…let me tell you a few things.

Life and golf had been synonyms for two-thirds of my life. What did I think about during those last moments before I fell asleep at night? What did I do when I wanted to relax or blow off steam? What woke me up before 5:30 am six days a week in the summer time? What made me think that school was a waste of day light hours? Golf.

I didn't start very young like the Great Tiger Woods, but my dad started putting me in summer golf tournaments when I was eight…and I hated it. Surprised? You might want to ask, "Why would you let something that you hate consume two-thirds of your life?" I have several answers.

1. I never asked my parents if I had the choice—to golf or not to golf.

a. I assumed it was a mandatory summer activity that became a mandatory after school activity as I grew older.

b. My whole family was doing it.

2. I hated golf to a point that I wanted to conquer it, to look down on the sport and shout, "HA! HAAA! Vengeance is mine!"

3. Golf paid for college.

4. Golf took the place of work. My first job wasn't until after my freshman year of college (at a golf course, of course).

5. When you work at something for so long with all your energy, you wake up one morning and realize that you've fallen in love with it. At least that was my experience.

In my last year of golf eligibility at Brigham Young University, I often wondered what life would have been like without golf. What did I miss? What was I missing? Don't get me wrong…I didn't quit. I gave golf my all during senior year, but I was too stubborn to admit that I was running out of gas. Sure, I had all the privileges and recognition that comes from playing a sport in college and being somewhat good at it, but aside from that…after I signed my last score card of my college career, what did I have to say for my life? I had 120+ college credit hours that lead me nowhere and lots of acquaintances that didn't bother with remembering how to say my name. They introduced me as "Red, the golfer," which mentioned the only two things people remember about me…the facts that I play golf and that I have red hair. My real name is Kerstin. It's Swedish. It's pronounced SHARE-sten.

Like I said, this story's not about golf.

Chapter 1

I saw him for the first time at a stake dance, the BYU 17th stake's Valentines' Day dance. I could use paragraphs to describe him, but…really…could any words be better than tall, dark, and handsome? There was nothing boyish about him—from his brown, expensive looking shoes and khaki pants to his square jaw and his short, clean-cut hair. At the time, I wondered if he stood in front of his bathroom mirror, as my little brother did back home, for 20 minutes to perfect his BYU approved hair cut. His long, well-defined frame leaned casually against the front wall of the massive multipurpose room, and his "salmon" colored button-up dress shirt made it difficult not to consider him a delicious addition to the room's décor of red and pink cutout hearts and white Christmas lights.

"That's him." Emily said following my gaze.

"Who is that?" I asked.

"The one I've been talking about," said Emily sounding annoyed. "Will Grandison from my home ward in Henderson. I told you he was going to be in our ward."

"An odd time to move in." I said. "It's more than a month into the semester."

"Haven't you've been listening to me?" Emily asked.

_Frankly, no._ I had to admit…at least to myself…that I wasn't a great listener. Obviously, it didn't help me in class any. I listened to the first 10 minutes of class, or in this case, Emily, but then I'd start daydreaming for the rest of the lecture/conversation. It was a miracle that I maintained a 3.5 GPA and kept Emily as a friend for so long. Emily and I met the first day of freshman orientation, started talking around 10 am that morning when we were waiting in line for our ID cards, and hadn't stopped talking since. I, unfortunately, would stop paying attention every once in a while.

"Listen, Red," Emily said. "He's taking Jared McClean's place in 'the house.'"

"That was a fast switch out. When did Jared get married?"

"I believe it was today. He met her the day before Thanksgiving."

"Yeah, you told me." I shook my head. "Only at BYU." For a people that are against the eat-drink-and-be-merry-for-tomorrow-we-die attitude, we sure don't waste time from the first date to eternal marriage, but when you know, you know, right?

I returned my focus to Will Grandison who was still leaning against the front wall, but the rest of the guys from "the house" had joined him. Ward legend had it that "the house" on 2230 N in Provo got its creative name from being the only house in the ward boundaries for awhile. There are others now including: "the cave," "the layer," and "the shrieking shack" (don't ask) just to name a few. One thing that "the house" provided without fail was the ward's hottest of hotties.

Ian, the outspoken one, stood the tallest and bulkiest of "the house" residents. Michelangelo must have chiseled Ian's frame and features himself, and Ian's mouth and laughter can be heard up to a 3 mile radius around him. On his first day in the ward the previous September, he let everyone know that he was a fullback on the football team. He didn't mention that he was third string. Next to Ian was his foil, Kyle. Soft-spoken Kyle had an adorable face with dark hair and green eye that (no kidding!) shimmered like emeralds in the sunlight. When you received the blessing of talking to him, he made you feel that you're the most important person to him. In the second you doubted that he was even listening, he would ask this deep question about what you said or give you the most divine advice that solves all your problems. Not really, but hey, you know what I mean. He was just a great guy. Needless to say, the entire ward and beyond was in love with him. At least he was on Emily's and my list of hotties. For the other two members of "the house," honestly, there isn't much to say. James and Jason were two blond twin BYU baseball players from Oakland. When baseball season started up, no one would see them until May or June when they're finally done with their season. I didn't know much else about them except that they gave talks in church the week before, and over half of the two minute talks consisted of "um…yeah, well…um." I was starting to feel sorry for the last speaker, but fortunately all seven verses to "A Poor Way Faring Man of Grief" came to the rescue.

And then there was this Will Grandison. I might have been bias, but I'd always had a low melting point for the tall, dark and handsome which made him the hotty of the hottest of hotties for me. It didn't take me long to realize that I wasn't the only girl at the dance to think so.

"He's so hhhhhhhot," said Jenna, our (Emily and my) roommate.

"It's rare to find a man who can wear pink," said Katie, our other roommate. "And let me tell you. He's. Wearing. It."

"I wonder if he'd call the color salmon like most boys or if he'd be sure of his manhood enough to call it pink." I smirked.

As I looked around the room, I saw other clusters of female roommates giggling and gawking at the new specimen_. _It was sad really, but that's what happens when every other lesson since Beehives was on celestial marriage and temple worthiness or somehow alluded to it. We all believed that once we marry in the temple, it's happily ever after. Yes, some girls had already found their happily ever after while others were still waiting. The leftover guys were always semi-taken, creepy, lazy or too picky. What could we (girls) do about it? We went to ward activities, we made ourselves look the best we could, and the more forward of our sex asked guys out when they were tired of waiting.

"Emily!" Jenna cried. "So what's his story?"

"He's Will Grandison from my home ward in Henderson…"

"New Hampshire?" Katie said, and the three of us looked at her with concern.

"No." I said slowly. "Nevada. It's a suburb of Las Vegas where Emily, your roommate, is from."

"Oh." She said still looking confused.

Emily continued, "I did an interview with his dad for an economics assignment in high school. We were supposed to get an interview with a CEO, CFO, or some other corporate chief officer. There are quite a few in my home ward, but Brother Grandison was the most approachable. He told me that he was a CEO of a company in Colorado before he sold it, and now he's the CEO of a non-profit hospice care organization that he started right after the other one sold. Anyway, I talked to my dad about it, and he said that the first company was sold for several billion dollars, and the non-profit organization is worth nearly 20 million." She reveled in our amazement before she added, "I heard that the Prophet himself wrote him a letter thanking him for the service he gives to the elderly not only of the church but also nation wide."

Jenna, Katie, and I blinked several times before turning to stare at him and to mumble, "wow." Would the fact that this guy's parents were loaded and his dad's this totally generous guy add to his hotness? I wasn't generally superficial…except for that one time I thought this guy was cute until he cut his hair (that was a shame), but having affluent and charitable parents definitely couldn't hurt a guy's hotness.

A Josh Groban song came up and couples headed to center floor. Girl/Guy clusters were still deciding how to divide evenly. Girl clusters would stare longingly at the Guy clusters who were more often than not trying to avoid eye contact with the females or (believe it or not) initiating hacky sack circles. Boys, go figure!

The residents of "the house" weren't dancing but were mingling with two cute girls—a little blond and a brunet. Will, however, was off to the side of the group. _Maybe, he wouldn't mind dancing with a random girl._

Emily smirked, "You're going to ask him."

"Of course." I smirked back. "Who would pass up a chance with that hottie?"

I made my way to the front wall maneuvering around the dancing couples. As I walked toward him, we held eye contact for a moment until he looked away. When I got to him, he gave me this "Who the heck are you?" and/or "What are you doing here?" look. My courage faltered a touch, but I made my choice. I was going to ask.

"Hey," I said with a smile. "Would you like to dance?"

I expected a shrug and a "sure" as most guys do, an "absolutely" from the energetic types, or a "yeah" from the "I should have stayed at home and played video games" types. The pause was taking longer than I was used to.

"No," said Will.

I waited for a second to see if he had the decency to explain why. No explanation came. Instead I heard giggling and laughter from the girls and Will's roommates. To my horror, they were all looking at me. With the pride that hadn't been completely squashed, I looked Will in the eye and said, "Oh…Okay," smiled and then said, "Bye."

As I walked back to my roommates, I tried my best to keep my shoulders from slouching. Even when I stood next to Emily, I wondered if I should have gone to the bathroom and regroup, but why should have I felt sorry for myself because a jerk said "no" to me? _Who does he think he is?_

"Jerk," I said under my breath.

I didn't want to look at my roommates in the eye, but I knew eventually I'd have to face them. You could fit a golf ball in each of their mouths.

"He didn't," cried Jenna and turned to stare at Will. "Who does that?"

"Nobody does that," said Katie. "You might be the first person ever at BYU to be rejected at a stake dance."

"Unlikely, but close." Emily said. "What did he say?"

"No," I mumbled.

"Just no?"

I nodded. "Jerk."

"The hottie just dethroned himself," Jenna said.

All the unoccupied girls were looking between the new guy and me. Their mouths were speeding a mile a minute. I wasn't sure if they knew exactly what happened, but why else would a girl walk across the room toward a guy during the beginning of a slow song. Based on the feminine scowls in the room directed at Will, I assumed Jenna was right; the hottie did dethrone himself. I felt better.

Just then I felt a tap on my shoulder and spun around to find myself face to face with Zach Newman.

I have nothing against nerds. I was and still am friends with many nerds. I'd embraced the fact that I was a nerd, and I came from a family of nerds as my bother's wife pointed out upon first meeting us. However, just because you've embraced the fact that you're a nerd, doesn't mean you have to make sure that you regularly remind the rest of the world by wearing nothing but plaid shirts tucked into tapered jeans and by talking about nothing but the latest code which you've written for a computer science class or your own personal amusement. I'm not saying that I never wore plaid or talked about computer programming, but some people should broaden their horizons.

Zach Newman was a nice guy and a good acquaintance, and I'd known him since I moved into the ward three and a half years ago. He'd listen intently to my golfing joys and trials, and I'd let him talk to me about his computer programming. I'd listen to him 20 percent of the time, but recently I'd been having dreams about him, nightmares actually.

The dream would start on my wedding day outside the Mesa temple. The photographer would be taking pictures of me alone, and then ask my husband to join me. Zach would materialize next to me sporting a plaid suit and tie. Next, the dream would flash forward to me lying on a hospital bed waiting for my husband to return with our new born baby after his/her first bath and shots. Zach in a plaid shirt would come handing me a baby swaddled in plaid. Then, the dream would take me to a pew in a chapel sitting next to Zach in his plaid suit and seven children wearing plaid. I would start to look down to see what I was wearing and … I'd wake up in a sweat.

I was currently face to face with the husband of my nightmares.

"Would you like to dance?" asked Zack grinning ear to ear.

Before I said anything the Josh Groban song was winding to an end. I could have said yes, danced for a few seconds, and then would've been done, but I didn't respond quickly enough. People, my roommates included, were in the middle of the dance floor anticipating an upbeat song.

I smiled and said. "How about the next Groban song?" Zach smiled and skipped away…um…literally.

Emily shook her head. "You should stop encouraging him."

"How am I encouraging him?" I seriously tried to consider. "I guess that I've never said "no" to him, but he's only asked me out a couple of times."

"You've gone with him to every First Presidency Christmas devotional since we've been in the ward together." Emily usually joked about this with me, but she was speaking earnestly now. "Guys like that might consider that going steady. You never know."

I, however, laughed. For last year's Christmas devotional, I even had it in my planner assuming Zach was taking me before he asked. I always wanted to go and never wanted to go through the hassle of getting my own tickets and driving to Salt Lake. The opportunities came up, and I took them. Unfortunately, it was always the same person who would ask me to go with him, and I'd go even though I had no enamored feelings for the guy outside of the sisterly/brotherly love the scriptures talk about.

After two fast songs, I heard Josh Groban's voice again. Our D.J. that the stake hired had a thing for Josh. I wished someone would tell him that too much of a good thing can be annoying.

I blinked, and I was dancing with Zach Newman.

"CS 430 is an awesome class. The sweetest part isn't until the final, though. We're playing capture the flag, us vs. EE," he said.

"That's awesome!" I said. I guess I really did encourage him. I genuinely thought it was cool. I wanted to be a EE (electrical engineering…pronounced "double E") major for awhile, and I did enjoy the CS (computer science) and EE classes I took even though I never got descent grades in them. After talking about it with my mom, I decided it might be better to major in something I was good at. Some of the basic CS classes were required in the EE major, but EE majors took the upper level CS classes as electives or in some cases just for kicks. I hoped the EE majors would win, but I kept that to myself.

"Yeah, I've played around with some code, but I'm not sure if I'm on the right track," he said.

"Oh." I never did code in my spare time.

Most people stay in one spot and circle during a slow dance, but Zach's lead was similar to a bishop's in chess—diagonally. I wasn't surprised to find us nearing the main entrance where Will was still leaning with his back against cutout hearts and lights. That's when I wondered to myself, _what kind of person would spend an entire dance against the wall and look around him as if everything was beneath him? Why doesn't he just leave?_

Over Zach's shoulder I saw Kyle, Will's roommate, whisper something to his dance partner and walk with her toward Will. Zack and I were moving closer. Hoping Zach wouldn't notice, I stopped our progression out the main door, but I didn't realize we were still in hearing range.

"Will!" cried Kyle. "Dance!"

"No," said Will.

"Dance and you might have fun."

"Fun?" Will laughed without humor. "I'd rather play FIFA."

"You hate FIFA."

"Exactly."

Kyle wasn't giving up. "You said you'd dance."

"I already said no a couple times. I'd be rude to start now."

_What was that? Was Will trying to be polite? No, can't be._

Kyle shrugged. "You could start with the ones that have already asked you. Red was the first one. She's pretty cool. She was on the golf team, and she's cute."

"Cute? Are you blind?" Will said, smirking. Then he leaned closed to Kyle and said something to him I couldn't hear.

My checks burned, and my hands started to sweat. I repeated over and over in my mind, _he did not just say that_. I meet Zach's eyes wondering if he heard what Will said. Since he gave me a blissful smile, I assumed he didn't. I looked around me to see if anyone else had heard. No one gave any indication, but if I heard, someone else must have as well.

I looked back at Will. He was condescendingly gazing over the dancers again. Out of nowhere, as if I had called his name, his eyes meet mine. I wasn't more than 10 feet away from him. I felt my cheeks burn hotter and hoped I wasn't blushing. I tore my eyes away from him, but instinctively they returned to his. He was still staring at me—probably confirming how…how uncute I was…or most likely just trying to figure out if I'd heard him.

_Why should you care what he thinks? Kyle thinks you're cute and he's on your list of hotties._

"Are you alright?" asked Zach.

"Uh, yeah. It's just…" I began without knowing how to finish. "Can you excuse me? I need to use the restroom."

Zach smiled graciously, but he couldn't hide the disappointment. I felt bad for a second, but I had to leave before the stubborn tears came. With Will's eyes still on me, I made my exit.

_Jerk!_


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Looking good, Red." said Jenna. "Is that dress new?"

I nodded, "I got it at on sale at Dillards last week."

As Jenna left the bathroom, she licked her finger and made a sizzling sound when she touched my hip.

As I checked myself out in the mirror, I noticed that all the darts were in all the right places. It's amazing what a dress can do for your body when it fits, and the navy blue color contrasted nicely to the spice and fire of my red hair. The lack of stress in my life left my face clear and flawless. I debated whether or not I put too much makeup around my eyes and did end up toning it down a bit. Why should I hide my crystal blue eyes?

After I made sure the pencil skirt of the dress went well below the knee, I pranced to the room Emily and I shared and sat on my bed to put on nude tights and strap on my mahogany pointy-toe high heals. I had to admire myself in our bedroom's full length mirror.

I looked hot. I vainly admired the wonders my high healed shoes were doing for my ankles and calf muscles. Then, I laughed at myself. I hadn't paid this much attention to detail in my appearance since I first had my crush on Jared McClean, the same Jared who got married the day before. Obviously, nothing came of my efforts, but this time I wasn't doing it for a crush. I was doing it to prove to myself that I was not only cute, but also hot. Yes, I probably did need a lesson on the dangers of pride and vanity, but my self-esteem at the time was pretty low.

Jenna, Katie, and I made it to church with five minutes to spare. Church wasn't in a normal church/chapel. We had it in the same room where we had the dance the night before. A makeshift pulpit and piano stood before rows and rows of chairs that had been laid out sometime between 11 pm the night before and 8:30 am the next morning.

Emily, the ward chorister, had come early to post the hymn numbers and talk to the pianist. I looked for her in her normal isle seat near the front, but I saw the back of a guy's head and was impress with the breadth of the guy's shoulders in a suit coat next to other guys in just white shirts. As we walked closer, Jenna and Katie jetted passed me and started giggling. The row where we usually sat was occupied by "the house" which meant that the owner of the shoulders I was admiring was Will Grandison. I flushed and slowed my pace. Who was I fooling? I didn't dress up to proof that I was hot. I dressed to make Will, the hot jerk, eat his words and regret not dancing with me, and of all days to connive, I chose Sunday…at church. I wanted to turn around and sit in the back, but Emily was saving me a spot next to her in the row in front of "the house."

_Okay, Kerstin. Head up, shoulders back, and avoid eye contact at all cost._

When I reached where Emily was sitting, I stepped over her scripture bag but missed the fact there was a pile of loose choir folders on which I slipped and tumbled (luckily rear first) into the vacant set between Emily and Jenna.

I heard Ian's voice behind me say, "That was graceful, Red."

"Perfect 10?" I asked.

"Not quite," he said. "For that the chair needed to fall backwards."

"I'll go for that next time." I gave him a nervous smile and giggle. _So much for an inconspicuous entrance, but I did avoid eye contact._

While Emily got up to conduct the opening hymn, I searched for a hymnal. There wasn't one near Jenna or Katie either. While I was looking, I felt a tap on my right shoulder. I spun around and was eye to eye with Will Grandison who offered me a hymnal. I smiled and whispered, "thank you," as I took it. He didn't even blink or change his impassive expression. I should have thanked him for condescending his grace to offer me a hymnal. He did, however, lower his eyes to his own book as the hymn's introduction ended which buzzed me out of my staring trance. I wheeled back around to share the hymnal with my roommates.

I took my time moving from sacrament meeting to Sunday School which I immediately regretted once I reached class. Will was in my favorite spot near the back next to the window which you could lean your head against. He wasn't even utilizing the window. Avoiding eye contact, again, was fruitless as he was basically staring at everyone who came in. When our eyes meet, he rolled his toward the window.

"Jerk." I mumbled and sat down in the front row.

"Red," Emily whispered. "We haven't ever sat in the front in the three and a half years we've been in the ward."

I shrugged and looked over to see who sat on the other side of me. It was the husband of my nightmares again in the flesh, Zach Newman, who was sporting a plaid tie and his ear to ear grin.

"Morning, Red," said Zach.

I smiled, "Good morning."

"You know in my CS 430 class we're coding a java compiler. Isn't that sweet! Checking for errors, exceptions and everything! Takes you back to CS 142 and 235, doesn't it?"

I continued smiling, but added periodic nodding. Luckily, the lesson began.

That night our ward held a "mix and mingle" ice cream social in our apartment's clubhouse. The clubhouse contains couches, a ping pong table, a mini kitchen, a piano, and a TV/VCR/DVD system. The door to the clubhouse was easily broken into for last minute ward choir practices and late night movie extravaganzas.

The fun factor of the "mix and mingles" weighed heavily on who was there, who you got to talk to, and how good the ping pong matches were. Often times, I didn't feel like socializing, but I went regardless because Katie and Jenna were on the social relations committee that put it together.

Once I entered the clubhouse still in my navy blue dress, Zach Newman cornered me and sheparded me diagonally toward the piano in the farthest corner. I waved my chances for ice cream good-bye. Zach was telling me how he was planning to attack his java compiler project. I should have been able to tell you the particulars of the conversation, but frankly, I wasn't listening. I was watching the ping-pong match where James and Jason were schooling Ian and Kyle. It was never fair when the twins were on the same team, and the unevenly matched teams made the game a drag. However, the game was much more exciting than Zach's explanation of his java compiler.

While the twins put the beat down on Ian and Kyle, Will was leaning against the wall on the other side of the ping-pong table next to the ice cream. Unlike the other guys in the room, he was still in his suit pants, white shirt, and tie. The little blond and little burnet girls from the dance squealed and giggled on either side of him. I found watching them giggle and pull on his sleeve without him paying the slightest bit of attention to them more entertaining than the game. I flushed when I noticed he was staring at me, and his stare was as far from enamored as you can possibly imagine with his brow furrowed, his jaw clenched, and his mouth scowled. _What did I do to him_?

After a few seconds of a staring contest, he blinked first and started walking towards me. Because he moved rather quickly, the girls who were on either side of him lost their balance. I couldn't hold my laughter, and by the time Zach finally realized I wasn't paying attention to him, he noticed there was a third party among us.

Zach introduced himself sheepishly, "Hey. I'm Zach Newman." and held out his hand.

"Will Grandison." He said briefly shaking it. They made an odd couple—the plaid shirt and tampered jeans on my left and white shirt and tie on my right…short, sandy and lanky on my left and tall, dark and incredibly hot on my right… one who wouldn't hurt a fly on my left and one who would burn the fly with the lazars that zap out of his eyes on my right.

"The Will Grandison?" Zach took a step back. "The Will Grandison!"

"Yes." Will sounded bored.

"You're chess match with Dr. Gales is legendary." Zach shook Will's hand again.

I switched focus from Zach's awe filled face to Will's uninterested one and back again. "Chess match?" I asked.

"At the end of CS 360 the final is a chess match," Zach said. "They say Will's program beat everyone else's in the class in less than 30 seconds each, and it beat Dr. Gales' in 4 minutes. Too bad he's EE."

"Oh," I said and swung my gaze to Will who apparently wasn't listening or didn't care about what Zach said at all.

"What's your major?" Will asked me.

"Statistics."

"Where're you from?"

"Phoenix."

"I hear you played golf."

"Yeah."

That's when Zach had an epiphany. "You're in my CS 430 class, aren't you?"

Looking down on Zach, Will contemplated for a moment. "Yes."

"You're going down in April. We'll capture your flag."

In an indifferent tone, Will responded, "You can try." Then he turned and walked off.

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

"He…what?" Emily cried.

"Yeah, he said, 'you can try,' and then left, out of the clubhouse," I said.

"I saw that part. Kyle, Ian, and the twins dropped the ping-pong game and ran after him. They were hogging the table anyway."

As we silently lay in bed, I couldn't get Will's face out of my mind, the furrowed brow, the set jaw, the scowl and the stare. If I hadn't measured up to his qualifications of a cute girl the day before, why was he still staring at me? Did he expect me to wither away under his gaze? "Jerk," I muttered.

"Hey, forget about it." Emily whispered through the dark. "Yeah, he's creepishly into himself, but we can ignore that."

"Maybe we could ask him about it at FHE tomorrow," I said sarcastically.

Emily laughed. "When's the last time anyone from "the house" has come to FHE?"

I was the FHE group co-leader of our apartment, the girls in apartment #14, and "the house." Kyle did come once last semester, but Ian, Jared McClean, and the twins never came. Jared was my co-leader, but I wondered if he even knew who I was. I'd call him many times to plan with him, but he never returned them. The girls from apartment #14 were close friends with Jenna and Katie; giggly sophomore girls naturally gravitated toward another. Emily and I served as chaperones making sure that the lessons lasted longer than 30 seconds and interrupting their gossip when it got out of hand. After months of eight girls and no guys, I was surprised that the other apartment still came. I'm sure they thought FHE was a righteous way to spend Monday night, but I think they came with the hope that someone from "the house" would come. We probably would have been more creative with our activities if the guys came, but we rotated between scategories, truth or dare, and drinking games some of the girls learned in high school (using water of course).

On that particular Monday night, after I settled down the girls for an opening hymn, we heard a knock at the door. The girls yelled in unison, "Come in!"

One by one the guys from "the house" filed in, all five of them. While Emily and I gaped motionlessly, the rest of the girls couldn't contain their excitement and squealed in delight. Most of the guys who were all return missionaries weren't sure how to react to squeals of six nineteen year old girls, but Will simply ignored them. When all got quiet again, I had everyone around the room introduce themselves since I doubted the guys knew or remembered any of the girls' names, and it was our first fully attended FHE.

"Hey, I'm Angie Arnold from Seattle majoring in biology"

"Erin Larsen from Portland, Organ. MFHD."

"I'm Sarah Fields from Mesa, Arizona, doing exercise science."

"I'm Rebecca Weight. I'm from Ogden, trying to get in the nursing program."

"My name's Jenna Clark from Seattle studying El Ed."

"I'm Katie Funks studying El Ed from Tallahassee, Florida."

"Hi. I'm Kyle from San Diego studying finance."

"I'm Ian Laird, Madden extraordinaire, from the great city of Highland, Utah studying exercise science."

"Um…I'm Jason from the Bay Area doing rec management."

"I'm James, no relation at all to Jason. I just…um…happen to be from the Bay Area and study rec management as well."

"Will Grandison (sighs from the girls) from Henderson, Nevada, EE."

"Are you an El Ed major, too?" asked Katie.

All the boys laughed except for Will.

"No," said Will.

"Electrical Engineering," added Kyle.

"Oh," said Katie without a hint of embarrassment, but I blushed for her.

"I'm Emily Richardson from Henderson, and I'm majoring in accounting."

I finished the round by saying, "And I'm Kerstin Ashby from Phoenix, Arizona, stats major."

"Are you Swedish?" Will asked.

Ian spoke for the rest of us. "That was random."

Will shrugged, "She looks Scandinavian."

"And her name's Kerstin." Kyle laughed. "No one calls you that. Even the Bishopric calls you Red."

"Yeah." I paused to stare at them for a second. "I'm half Swedish. Did you guys serve your missions there?"

Kyle nodded while Will just stared…no, wrong word…he glared at me. Anyway, after everyone declared their family lineage concluding that I was the most Swedish, we finally began FHE with a full house.


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

During my fifth year at BYU, I still had my athletic scholarship that covered tuition and room & board, as long as I took more than 12 credits a semester and worked for the athletic department in some capacity. The athletic department constantly and desperately needed tutors for the general education classes and had a particularly high demand for statistic tutors. Each week I spent about 15 hours with ten to twelve athletes.

To take advantage of ones tutor, one should have gone over the materials, attempted the homework, and have questions ready to ask before the set meeting time. What ends up happening, though, is that I teach them the material they weren't awake for in class as we work throw the homework (with me holding their hand the whole way). Getting the homework done and passing the class was far more important to them than learning the material. I might sound like I hated it, but I didn't. I met with the athletes on my time, and the department didn't make me keep track of hours or anything because I wasn't getting paid by the hour. Besides…I looked forward to meeting the athletes, talking with them about their upcoming or preceding events, listening to their successes and goals, and helping them with their statistics homework.

It was a test week for stat 221 which meant tutoring sessions would consist of me waiting patiently while my pupil worked through the practice exam. I told them the week before to have the practice exams finished, but they never did. When two hours were up and we had still 1/3 of the practice exam left to go through, they begged me to do a test review. I told everyone that I'd do one on Thursday at 7 pm.

On Thursday at 7 pm, three people were there. By 7:15 PM twelve more people came. I assumed word got out about my review because I didn't recognize everyone there. The stat department didn't do reviews for their Basic Principles class because they figured review sessions spoon feed answers to students and stifled learning. However, I knew my pupils better than the stat department. They cared as much about stats as I did about the random ants I squish with my thumb.

"Alright, does anyone have any questions to begin with?" I inquired. I didn't have to ask, though, because I already knew what questions they'd ask.

"How long's the test?" One asked.

I debated whether or not to be blunt and say, "If you'd go to your lab or stay awake in lecture, you'd know," but I said, "The test usually has 80-85 questions, 70 or so multiple choice and the rest true and false. Then there's the free response question."

"How long is that?"

"It's about the same as answering one of the longer homework problems with five or six parts to it." I was always tempted to tell them what the free response question was because it's been the same question since I took the class three years before, but that would be against the honor code.

"How long does the test take?"

"Plan about two hours."

"When's the last day to take the test?"

"Wednesday. Remember you need to have the test in your hand by 4 pm. Are there any other questions?" Silence. "Okay. I'll get started then. Who can tell me what a distribution is?" Silence again. I waited 30 seconds. "Anyone? What's a distribution?" _You guys are in trouble._

After a couple more questions to which nobody responded, people finally began to answer, so I began to reassure myself that our tutoring sessions hadn't been a complete waste of time. At the end of two hours, I was spent and one of the athletes was asleep in the back against the wall—_his loss not mine_.

I finished the review by saying, "You guys need to study more…I mean…start studying. I recommend learning the vocabulary on the class web site. There is also a link to an outline that has a brief summery of everything you need to know for the test. Any last questions?"

"How long's the test?"


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Ring, Ring, Ring! The apartment phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Red. It's me!"

"Hey, Emily. What's up!"

"I ran into some friends from home who're headin' to Vegas in about a half hour." It was 8:07 PM. "I know we're planning to watching Pride and Prejudice tonight and then the Trading Spaces marathon on Presidents day, but…"

"Hey, it's fine. Go!"

"You want to come?"

"To Vegas?"

"Yeah. We're staying at Hannah's tonight and then at mine on Saturday and Sunday. How about it?"

I paused. Indecisiveness is not a virtue. Emily's home friends were cool, but there'd always been a distinct line between me and the home friends. You'd think that after so many years, I'd catch on to their inside jokes and not feel like a fly on the wall when they came to hang out at our place or we at theirs. I'd been to Vegas with them before. The choice was between being a fly on the wall or alone with the giggly nineteen year olds in Provo.

"No, I think I'll hang out here."

"Okay." Emily said sounding worried. "Promise me you won't have ramen every meal."

I looked down at the pot of ramen boiling on the stove. "Okay, I promise."

"And make sure you get the mail. Jenna and Katie never do and…neither do you. Make sure the door's lock before you get in bed. Remind Jenna and Katie to turn off the lights and TV when they're not using them. Oh, and don't forget to turn off the curling iron before you go to church. Do you want me to call and remind you Sunday morning?"

"No." I rolled my eyes.

"I saw you turn it off when we got home from church last week." Emily said, and when I didn't say anything, she added, "Hey, I'll be by to pick up some things in a little bit. Are you sure you don't want to come? It'll be great."

"I'm sure it will, but no."

"See ya in a bit, then."

"Yeah, bye."

Thirty seconds later…

Ring, Ring, Ring!

"Hello?"

"Hey, Red. It's Dan."

_Who the heck is Dan?_ I heard girls laughing and music blasting through the phone.

"Dan Erickson. You're my stats tutor."

"Oh, Hey! Sorry about that."

"It's okay. Um…I had trouble doing some of the practice exam problems. Do you have time to help me next week before Wed?"

I heard a girl in the background. "Dan, you wanna go hot tubbing?"

"Just a sec." Dan said, and then to me. "I know the student athlete building's closed on Monday, but could we meet in the library?"

"Sure. How's 1 work?"

"Great. Yeah, thanks."

"No problem."

"See ya then."

"Okay, bye."

"Bye."

Ring, Ring, Ring!

_What's up with these calls?_ "Hello?"

"Hi, honey!"

"Hey, Mom."

"Why aren't you out tonight?"

"Mom!"

"You didn't go out last Friday either."

"Mom, can we skip this conversation this week?"

"Honey, you can't find a husband if you don't have any friends, and you won't have any friends if you sit at home alone eating ramen on a Friday night."

"Mom, please. I'd rather do my own thing."

I heard Mom sigh before she said. "I was hoping that you'd deny what I said about eating Ramen."

"To deny, would be to lie, and 'wo unto the liar, for…'"

"You told me that you quit." Mom interrupted.

"I did…for awhile. Old habits die hard, Mom."

"Honey, high blood pressure and heart disease runs on your dad's side of the family."

"We all got to go some way or another."

"Kerstin, I'm serious. Watch yourself."

"Just once more won't hurt."

"Kerstin…" Mom gave a warning tone.

"Everybody's doing it."

"Kerstin…" Mom tried again.

"It'll make me look older."

"Oh, honey, stop it. You need to eat better. You won't feel good physically or emotionally if you only eat Ramen, Pop tarts, and starburst jelly beans." Mom took a deep breath. "And, dear, remember…" I started mouthing with her. "…living single is easy, but not as fulfilling and rewarding as living with a spouse." Mom sighed. "I worry about you. I thought that you'd open up more after golf—make more friends, date more."

I didn't say anything to that. I loved doing my own thing, when I wanted…where I wanted. No limits. Nobody to check in with or have responsibilities for. But…at the end of the day…I dreamt of love, romance, happiness, eternal life. You really can't have it all sitting on your rear on a Friday night.

"I love you, hon." Mom said.

"Love you, too."

"Call me Sunday."

"Okay. Bye."

"Bye-Bye."

Ring, Ring, Ring!

_Cheese! _"Hello?"

"Hey, Red. It's me." A masculine voice said. "It's Zach. Zach Newman."

_Is it that obvious that I'm the only one at home?_ "Oh, hey."

"Are you doing anything tonight?"

_I'm going to eat Ramen and watch the 5 hour Pride and Prejudice movie_. "No."

"You wanna see a movie? I hear 99999999 is hilarious." Zach sounded like an energetic seven year old.

_No, Kerstin. No!_ "Sure."

"Sweet! Meet me in the parking lot in 5 minutes."

_So much for the Ramen_. "Okay. See ya in a bit."

"Bye."

I ran to the bathroom to make my appearance at least reasonable, and then ran out the door. I bumped into Emily knocking her into one of her home friends.

"Where are you going?" She asked.

"I'm going to see a movie with…" I didn't want to admit it.

But Emily persisted. "…with…"

"Zach," I said.

"Red!" She said shaking her head. "You're _running_ to see a movie with Zack."

I stopped and stood still. "We're seeing ­­9999999999," and I liked seeing movies, even better when somebody else was paying for it. However, I slowly walked the rest of the way to the parking lot. "Have fun in Vegas!" I called.

"Hey, Red!" Zach glowed with excitement, and I regretted saying "sure." Watching Pride and Prejudice by myself would have been better than this, but I couldn't back down now. At least we wouldn't be staring at each other or talking during the movie, and I was curious to see if his yellow, orange, and red plaid shirt glowed in the dark.

Because Zach didn't own a car, I'd be pleasantly and unpleasantly surprised each date with what car he borrowed. In December for the Christmas devotional he borrowed his roommate's new Ford F250, and his roommate had him sign his name in front of the other roommates (witnesses) that Zach would pay financially and physically if anything happened to the truck. Zach had told all this as a joke, but knowing the Ford F250's owner, it was no joke.

For the movie, Zach had borrowed a Nissan made in the early 90's that should have been buried in the 90's as well. Still glowing, Zach opened the door for me. As I sat down, I saw that it once had a working automatic seat belt. It was no longer connected. I fumbled around for the lap belt, but couldn't find it.

"Um…Zach." I swallowed. "I can't find the set belt." I moved my hand around in the crack to my right and under the set…weary of what my hand would find other than a set belt.

"Let me." He said while unbuckling himself. My lap felt the weight and warmth from his body as he stretched out over me. I could tell that he was wearing allspice deodorant and had some sort of pasta and marinara sauce for dinner. I looked up and pressed my eye lids together. _Why did I agree to this? Can this get any more awkward?_ After an eternity with his upper body in my lap, he cried "I found it!" and belted me in.

"Great." I replied. _Just great._

In sacrament meeting at church, I was excited to sit in the middle of a row and not in the front because Emily wasn't there to conduct the music. Jenna and Katie sat on my right and were joined by the girls from apartment 14 who were all verbally disappointed that "the house" residents weren't there. I blinked, and Zach materialized onto the set to my left.

"Fun movie Friday night, huh," said Zach.

"Yeah." I would not face him. I was trying to give him clear hints about my feelings for him with my body language and actions. At the movie, he had his arm stretched out behind me, and for the duration of the film I made sure that my back wasn't touching anything and my hands were unreachable. After Zach walked me to the door at the end of our "date," I quickly said "good-bye" and did not linger. I even tried not to smile throughout the evening which was hard to do especially since the movie was a comedy.

After the sacrament was over, I felt something brush my shoulder, and then I felt a limb that was definitely not mine weigh down on the back of my chair. I jolted forwards, and for the remainder of sacrament meeting I sat on the edge of my set. I thought that people had DTR's (determine-the-relationship discussions) before putting arms around the opposite sex.

As we left for Sunday School, I grabbed Jenna's arm and whispered, "I'll explain later." I forcibly dragged her to the Sunday School's classroom. I sat in my usual window seat with Jenna on the other side of me, but Zach sat behind me whispering commentary into my ear throughout the lesson.

In Relief Society, I was finally free.


	6. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

On Monday night, President's Day, it had been a day and a half since I saw Zach Newman. Well…I should admit that I'd been making it difficult for him to catch me. I spent all of Sunday at apartment 14 with Jenna and Katie which was weird because I'd never hung out with them before, but when they saw that I'd brought Mouse Tracks ice cream and didn't laugh too much at what the girls called crises, they were fine with my presence.

However, during truth or dare, the girl named Sarah asked, "Why are you here?"

"You mean 'Why am I at BYU?'" I asked hopefully.

"No." She looked annoyed. "Why are you hanging out with us? You never do that."

All the girls stared with anticipation drooling from their lips (not really…but funny image).

"I want to get to know you guys better." I tried to look innocent, but they weren't buying it. "I'm avoiding someone."

While Jenna and Katie were bursting with laughter, Sarah asked, "Who?"

"You're only allowed one question." I said, but Katie screamed through her tears and laughter, "Zach Newman!" and everyone else started laughing, too.

Rebecca said, "You can stay as long as you want."

"Come on, guys." I said. "He's a good guy. Don't laugh."

"Why are you hiding from him then?" Rebecca asked with a giggle.

I didn't feel that I needed to answer that question.

During the day on Monday, I spent as much time as I could on campus, but even the library had limited hours. After tutoring, some studying, and reading a random book, I went home. I ran into Jenna, Katie, and the apartment 14 girls leaving for a movie. They invited me to come along.

"What movie are you guys seeing?" Movies perked my interest.

"999999999" Rebecca announced. "I hear it's funny."

"Yeah, it is. I saw it on Friday."

"Oh." Rebecca sounded disappointed. I was touched, but they only had one small car for the six of them assuming they didn't invite anyone else. But…hey…it's good to be wanted even though it's for your car.

Jenna and Katie started cracking up. "Is that what you did with Zach on Friday?" Jenna asked.

I blushed, and everyone laughed.

"Did he try to put his arm around you like he did in church?" Katie asked.

My blush deepened, but I gave a quick laugh before running inside.

When a knock came to the front door Monday night, panic rushed over me. Maybe the knocker would give up and go away. The knock came again louder. I heard, "We know you're in there," and some masculine laughter.

I opened it and viewed all the residents of "the house" staring at me as if they caught me red handed.

"I was…w-washing my hands." I stammered.

"Sure you were," said Ian with a smirk. At that, he and everyone else filled our front room. While Jason and James turned on the TV to ESPN, Kyle, Ian and Will headed to the kitchen with grocery bags and started emptying them on the kitchen table—eggs, milk, bacon, Bisquick, syrup, oranges, bananas, etc.

"Hungry?" Kyle asked me.

"Uh…" I blinked.

Will looked into the pot cooking on the stove and turned up his nose. "Ramen."

"Ramen." Kyle groaned.

"Ramen!" said Ian with mocking disgust.

Will took it off the stove, poured it down the sink, and started the disposal.

"Hey, that's my dinner!" I protested.

"Obviously," Kyle said. "Not anymore."

Will sighed and stared at me for second before he and Kyle proceeded to look through all our cupboards and drawers.

"What are you guys doing here?" I asked still fuming about the lost Ramen.

Everyone stopped what they were doing (even the TV seemed muted for a second) and stared at me.

Ian stated what was obvious to everyone else, but me. "FHE."

"Oh." I said, and everyone went back to what they were doing.

"Do you mind us looking for pans and…salt?" Kyle asked.

"Go right ahead." I said.

"Where is everyone?" Ian asked.

"They went to a 5 o'clock show. They should be back soon."

"Why didn't you go with'em?"

"I saw it on Friday."

"Hot date?"

"Not exactly."

Ian manned the bacon on the stove next to Will who was sautéing vegetables for scrambled eggs. Kyle was making pancakes. While I was enjoying the scene (a little too much) of three hot guys making breakfast before me, I decided to start cutting up the oranges while Jason and Jame's watched sport center.

"They'll clean up with the girls." Ian told me. "The twins will enjoy that."

I wasn't paying attention when the next knock on the door came, but I heard a familiar male voice ask, "Red here?"

Jason yelled, "Red! Some guy's here to see you!"

As I walked to the door, I heard the commotion from the kitchen cease followed by some snickering.

"Hey, Zach." I said.

"Hey." He peered pass me wide eyed and pale. I looked behind me as well. Jason and James had made themselves comfortable on the coach and love seat. Kyle and Will were busy with pancakes and eggs, and when my eyes reached Ian, he winked at us. "What's going on?" Zach asked softly.

"FHE."

"Oh." He took another look around the apartment. "Where are the other girls?"

"It's just Red and us for family time," yelled Ian from the kitchen. "We're making her breakfast."

Zach looked at me intently as if questioning the validity of Ian's remark.

"The rest of the girls will be here any minute." Before I even finished my words, familiar giggles sounded from the parking lot. When Jenna, Katie, and the apartment 14 girls spotted Zach and me talking, their laughter raised 30 decibels.

"Red, you should have come with us!" cried Rebecca.

"Yeah!" Sarah said. "Do you want to finish FHE at our place?"

I shock my head and said pointing inside my apartment, "The guys are cooking us breakfast."

The girls squealed and rushed passed Zach and me into the apartment. Boisterous laughter and smells of breakfast filled the apartment making it seem smaller, warmer, more inviting.

"Zach, you coming?" Kyle cried and the girls giggled. _Oh, how I wish they would restrain themselves!_

Zach asked me, "Do you want me to come?"

"Only if you want." I didn't smile.

"Okay," and he stepped right in. I rushed back to the kitchen to finish cutting the oranges (they bought 10). Ian stood next to me and whispered, "So, was that your hot date Friday?"

"More or less." I responded.

While he playfully flipped out my hair, Ian suggested, "Shouldn't you go freshen up?"

I elbowed him in the ribs, but Ian laughed and cried, "What'd I do?"

We sat and ate in the front room, half on couches and half on the floor with ESPN providing the back ground music/noise. Everyone except Will was talking at once, even Jason and James were animated with all the girls.

"Where were you guys?"

"Vegas. We stayed at Will's place."

"That's where Emily went."

"Yeah, we saw her yesterday at church."

"Will's dad has a stuffed rhino in his 10 car garage."

"No way!"

"Yeah. He shot it in Africa."

"Hey, isn't that poaching?"

"Not when it's legal."

All the guys oohed and awhed about the coolness of Will's house. It sounded fascinating as if it should be toured on HGTV or TLC, but all through the conversation Will sat quietly on the floor with his back and head leaning against wall away from everyone else. I couldn't believe that he wasn't saying anything, and we were talking about his house for crying out loud.

The conversation then took twists and turns until we rested on the movie that the girls had just seen and I saw on Friday. Zach was more animated in this topic of conversation, but I remained silent. Ian whispered in my ear, "You weren't paying attention to the movie at all, huh." and motioned toward Zach.

I discreetly elbowed him in the ribs, again. I wasn't sure if Zach had heard what Ian said, but Zach did turn to me and said, "I got to go."

I blinked a few times—not knowing what he expected me to do. "Okay." I said slowly. I got up with him and followed him (a whole five feet) to the door.

"Thanks for din…breakfast." Zach said.

"No problem." Kyle and Ian said.

"Bye, Zach." The girls cried in unison through their laughter.

"Bye." Zach announced and then personally gave me a "see you later."

After the door closed, I was faced with the "ooos" from the girls and laughter from most of the boys. I reddened, but luckily nothing more was said.

Emily burst through the door and was greeted with "Emily...Emily…Hey, Emily!" from just about everyone. She smiled, blushed prettily and excused herself to put her belongings away. When she returned, Kyle jumped up and helped her get some din-fast.

After Emily was done eating, the clean up went slowly because of the crowd crammed in the kitchen. Jason and James did most of the work, but you could tell by the laughter that they didn't mind too much being surrounded and crowded by seven girls.

Kyle and Ian were deep in conversation while Will and I were facing the TV showing Steve Nash at a press conference. Will turned to me to speak his first words in a couple hours. "Do you like him?"

"Who? Steve Nash?" I looked at him questionably. _Was he really trying to small talk with me? _"He looks better with his hair…"

"No. Newman." Will interrupted. "Zach Newman."

"Oh." I wished that Will could have eased his gaze a little. The intensity was freaking me out. "He's a nice guy."

Will scowled. "You should tell him."

"What?"

"He needs to know that you're not interested in him." He said. I sensed strain in his voice as if he were focused on keeping it low and steady.

My jaw clenched. "I'm giving him all the hints."

"Really," said Will. "I see mixed signals."

"Like I said, he's a nice guy. I don't want to hurt him."

"Let's put this in his perspective. Tell me what's worse, Kerstin." He paused. "Being told out right that the girl you like isn't mutually interested or being made a fool by that girl and her friends behind your back."

I swallowed what little saliva I had left in my mouth while trying to release my clenched jaw. "Is that what you think I'm doing? You…" _He thinks that I'm not only unattractive, but heartless as well. _I used every ounce of my self-control to say slowly and quietly, "Who are you to tell me what to do?"

We stood face to face for a few breaths while Sport Center switched from basketball to hockey highlights and people were still cleaning, clearing, and chattering all around us. Then, I turned and escaped to my bedroom. I heard Ian cry, "Let's go!" and several "Bye's" and "Thank you's." Finally, the front door opened and closed. Silence.

_Why does the hottest guy...in my world...have to be a jerk?_


	7. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Zach Newman and I would run into each other periodically on campus. The computer science department and the statistics department shared the same building (the Talmage Building) along with the math department. However, the week after Presidents' Day, the number of times I ran into Zach increased significantly…uncomfortably so. We'd say, "hi," and I'd try not to smile, but ultimately I'd give in to the habit. He'd stop to chat with me if he saw me studying on one of the couches that lined the main hall way.

"Red!"

I looked up from my Bayesian homework. "Hey, Zach. What's up."

"My Java compiler ran sweetly. I just sent in the code."

"Awesome. What's next?"

"We're taking a break for the midterm." Zach sighed, but added with more energy, "Did I tell you about my 'secrets to viruses and hackers' class?"

"Yeah." I said with a little jealously. The class sounded cool. What can I say? I was and would always be a nerd.

"We're writing our own viruses and then sending them to a classmate."

"Weird! How does that work without messing up the lab's computers."

After listening for 30 seconds, I spaced out while staring at him. After a pause to let his words sink in, he said, "Well, I got to get to class. See you around."

"Yeah." I smiled, but stopped when he blushed with his signature ear to ear grin. I watched him turn and prance off…literally.

_Shoot._

The apartment phone rang. Ring, Ring, Ring!

"I'll get it!" yelled Katie. Then, a knock came to my door.

"Red, it's a boy!" Katie giggled as if I never got calls from boys which was true if you didn't count the ones related to me or the athletes calling for a tutor…or Zach. Katie threw me the phone.

"Hello?"

"Kerstin Ashby?"

I gasped. He said my name correctly. "That's me."

"Hey, I'm Cooper McCoy. I am looking for a stats tutor."

I hung on every word coming from his deep, rusty voice. "I only have a couple times left. Monday morning at 8, Friday morning at 8, and Friday after 5."

"Could we do it earlier on Friday, like 7:45? I've a 9 o'clock class."

"Sure."

"How about tomorrow?"

I winced. It was 10 pm Thursday night, but with a shrug I said, "Sure. At the SAB (Student Athlete Building)?"

"Could we do it somewhere else?"

"We could do it in the library...in the "no shhhh!" zone?"

"Yeah, that'd be better," said he.

A pause.

"Hey," Cooper began. "Just so you know. I'm white with brown hair, brown eyes, 6'3" and 238 lbs. You can't miss me."

I laughed. "Football?" Would a basketball player weigh that much?

"Yeah."

"I'm white with red hair, blue eyes, 5'7", and 130 lbs." I blushed after I said it, but thankfully he laughed.

"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow." He said.

"Bye."

That voice played over and over in my head in bed that night. He had said my name right. No one says my name right the first time without hearing it right first. He must be another Swedish missionary. I'd never been as excited as I was that Friday morning for a tutoring session before. For the second time that semester, I took extra care about my appearance, I woke up around 6 am to pamper and beautify myself. After a few smiles to myself in the mirror and pop tarts, I drove to school.

Students sporadically dotted campus that morning. The crowds didn't usually come until 7:53. My watch read 7:42 when I entered the library. As I headed to the "No shhhh!" zone, I foolishly began to worry that we wouldn't meet up, but as I neared the information desk, I saw a guy that wouldn't ever go unnoticed. His chiseled body leaned casually against the information desk, and his black jacket outlined the breadth of his shoulders and chest as if it were designed specifically for him. After he looked up and studied me for a bit, a smile grew on his face revealing a dimple on his left cheek.

"130 lbs?" He asked as he walked toward me.

I could tell that he was looking me up and down, and I did my best impression of a cat walk turn accompanied by my blush and giggle. He laughed and said, "Now, that's a stats tutor. Cooper McCoy." He held out his hand.

I shock it. "Kerstin Ashby."

"Let's get this started." He motioned me to lead us to a table. I did so feeling his eyes burning my back. After I sat down, he took a set next to me and took off his jacket. A fresh whiff of 88888888 flew from his jacket. I was glad I was sitting down.

"I hear you're a golfer." He said.

"Yeah."

"Get out much?"

"Not as much as I used too."

As I wondered how he knew about me, he said, "Al gave me your name?"

I smiled. "Good old Al." Al had duel responsibility as an academic advisor over the women's golf team and half the football team, and he gave his "golfing ladies" the preferred treatment. I owed him a lot for helping me organize my stat classes after my fourth year, so I could graduate by the next April. The majority of those I tutored were sent by him.

"So," I said. "Where would you like to start?"

"I'd like to…" He pulled out his stats book and thumbed through the pages. When he stopped thumbing, he pulled out a notebook with the homework assignment. He continued, "ask you a few questions about the homework."

I gawked at the homework he'd done. I didn't remember the last time anyone had come to me with homework already done. Most of the athletes that do it themselves don't even bother with a tutor…feeling, "what's a tutor for if you can already do the homework?"

"Go ahead." I said.

Instead of asking me general questions like "what's a p-value?" he asked me questions that made me think and sometimes look in the book real fast to make sure that I was right. After 30 minutes of asking questions and having me look over his homework, he said. "Thanks. That helped a lot."

I smiled. "It's been a while since I haven't spent the entire tutoring session doing the homework."

As if repeating great old Al himself, he said, "You don't learn as much that way." He returned my smile and added a wink. "Does this time work for you next week?"

"Sure." I said.

"Thanks again."

"No problem." I watched him back up his stuff and put on his jacket sending another wave of his cologne my way.

He gave me another glimpse of his dimple and said, "See ya."

"Bye."

For the rest of the day, I pictured his face, his dimple, and how he smiled when he saw me. I heard his deep, rusty voice echo in my mind as I tried to relive the freshness of his cologne. _I have it bad. He probably has a girl friend._ Like I said…I had a thing for the tall, dark, and handsome. I hardy ever flirted, but I blushed when I remembered how I turned when I noticed him checking me out. That wasn't like me.

That night, I stayed late in the Talmage building to finish a couple of homework assignments that I didn't want to be bothered with on Saturday. Around 10:35 pm I suppressed a cheer when I finally logged off the computer at which I'd that been sitting at for the last seven hours. As I headed out to the main hall, I saw a blue/green plaid shirt.

"Zach!" I called with glee still lingering from logging off for the weekend. "Hey!"

"What's up, Red!" He said giving me a toothy grin.

"I've no work over the weekend." My smile faltered when I realized that I shouldn't want Zach to know that information. "What are you doing here so late?"

"Just finished debugging a computer in the Math lab."

"Cool." I turned to leave, but Zach stopped me.

"Hey, Red?"

"Yeah."

"Can I've a ride?"

I hesitated but felt mean for not having offered it first. "Sure."

On the drive home, while tuning out Zach's account of his upcoming tests, I remembered Will Grandison's condescending expression as he said, "He needs to know you're not interested." Will's voice in my head taunted, _you know I'm right._ I snapped back, _Well, Will, how do you suggest going about it?_

After Zach paused for a breath, I interrupted. "Look, Zach…"

"Yeah?"

"I…um…" I swallowed. "Could we…"

_Say it, Kerstin. Say it._

Zach misunderstood my hesitation. "Do you want to go out with me tomorrow?"

"Uh…no…" I fumbled for words. "I've plans." I wasn't lying if you count running to the dollar theater to watch a couple movies by yourself as plans.

"Oh."

"Look, Zach…" I tried again. "You're a good guy and…"

"You're a good egg." Zach interrupted.

"A…what?" I cried.

"A good egg." Zach repeated. "My grandma says it all the time." He went on to talk more about his Grandma. I didn't interrupt him.

_I'm such a chicken._


	8. Chapter 7

A/N: If you haven't noticed, I'm not the best speller, and unfortunately, spell check doesn't help me when I'm not even close to begin with...so...Help! I luckily did fix the Roman/Ramen problems I had earlier although it was a little late. Thanks for reading and reviewing! I appreciate it.

Chapter 7

"Where are you going?" Emily asked.

I looked down at my BYU Athletic Dep. sweats and adidas shoes. My hair was stuffed into a hat that I usually wore golfing. "Running," I said.

Emily's eyes narrowed, and she crossed her arms. It was Saturday 4:22 pm. She knew me too well.

"Emily." I said. "Come on. I haven't done it in a while."

"Just one. No more." She said, "and don't just eat candy tonight."

"Emily," I whined. "I need this."

Emily rolled her eyes. "Give me your car keys and call me when you're done."

"I can run home."

"You're not running home after 11 o'clock at night."

"It's less than a mile."

Emily shook her head, held out her hand, and waited. I relented.

After my first movie at the dollar theater, I walked next door to Shopco to bug candy and look around for a while. When I headed back to the theater, cars flooded the parking lot, pedestrians were dodging cars, and the ticket lines blocked traffic. I cautiously stepped through the parking lot and into the theater grateful that I'd already gotten my ticket. _Haha!_

With 20 minutes still to go, I took a seat in the middle of the back row where a lot of people (for some reason) over look to sit. While incognito in sweats and no makeup, I stared freely at people. I smiled at the girls and guys obviously dressed to impress, laughed at those who were oblivious to their predators, and sighed at those who were impressed and meant to be impressed. In the midst of the chatter and overdone giggles, Cooper McCoy stood out with some plus sized Polynesians, most likely offensive or defensive lineman, and a couple porcelain Barbie dolls in tight jeans and cashmere cardigans. I made the mental note to duck out as soon as I could.

As time drew nearer to show time, I felt some commotion to my right. I stifled a cry of disappointment and turned to see who it was.

_Will Grandison?_

Will and a large group of people were headed down my row. I recognized the blond and brunette who were with "the house" before. Behind them, I saw Ian and what looked like some couples. I stared at Will's expressionless face as he counted the seats to see how far he needed to move down.

"Would you move down two?" He asked.

I moved down, and he sat next to me and pulled out a cell phone.

"Hey…yeah, she's here…sure," he's brow furrowed as he said, "seriously?" and turned toward me for a second. "sure…no problem…yeah."

He put his cell back into his front pant pocket and took off his jacket. His scent made me melt in the cushioned chair, sweat and blush. I couldn't pinpoint if it was a cologne or just laundered freshness.

"Aren't you hot in that?" asked Will.

I shook my head (not necessarily in response to his question), "No."

Will lifted an eye brow. "You often see movies by yourself."

I heard the blond girl next to him giggle to her brunet counterpart "who does that?" and turn to look at me.

"People do it." I retorted defensively.

"Uh-huh." said Will.

While the two girls on the other side of Will were laughing, I waited for Will to crack a mocking smile or make a comment. Nothing came.

"It's not like you talk or get to know the people next to you at a movie." I said while trying to open my ring pop.

Will leaned back in his chair using up his leg room as well as some of mine, "We're talking now."

I leaned forward to look back at him. "I like taking breaks from…people and well…" _reality…_ "It's fun and relaxing." I fought to open the ring pop to no avail and threw it down into my lap.

Will grabbed the ring pop, opened it while saying, "Some people smoke to relax, but that doesn't mean that it's right…or healthy," and handed the candy back to me. "There are other outlets."

I popped the ring in my mouth and leaned back in my seat. _Who does he think he is?_

As the previews started, Will leaned his head in my direction and asked, "Did you tell him?"

"Who, Zach?" I took his silence to mean yes. "In so many words, but…"

"…but…" He prompted. "Does he understand you're not interested or not?"

I shrugged.

During the first half of the movie, I struggled to keep my body shifting minimal while Will and the other girls sat motionless to my right. I couldn't say if my restlessness had more to do with the movie's slow beginning, Will sitting next to me, or seeing my second movie of the day. While the main characters were crying over the death of a friend—that frankly deserved to die for how many drugs he used, I slipped out my unopened bag of starburst jelly beans. As with the ring pop, I fought to open it. I heard hushes near me, so I stopped fighting with the bag for a few seconds before giving it my all. As soon as the package opened, precious jelly beans scattered all over the floor. Will handed me some that landed in his lap.

During the second half of the movie, the action finally began, but the frequent random slow motion scenes (the car colliding with a gas tank, John Doe falling in style, the bullets flying out of a machine gun) grew ridiculous. By the last scene when the bad guy and John Doe were running at each other with machetes in slow motion, I couldn't suppress my laughter any longer. Needless to say, I was the only one laughing in the theater in the midst of hushes and heads turning. I buried my mouth with my sleeves.

Before I stood up when the credits began, Will said, "I can see why you see movies by yourself." I turned to him, but found him expressionless, looking as if he said nothing at all.

Outside the movie theater, Ian and the girls inhaled my appearance and laughed.

"Was that you laughing, Red?" Ian asked while he laughed.

I gave a weak smile and rushed off. When I reached the out skirts of the nearly vacant parking lot, I heard foot steps following me.

"Red!"

I turned around and saw Will followed by the rest of the crowed who were with him in the theater.

"What are you doing?" Will called as he walked closer to me.

"Going home."

Will's eyes narrowed, "Walking?"

"Running."

"It's nearly midnight."

"This is Provo. Nothing happens." I said.

"Yes, stuff happen in Provo." Will was still walking nearer to me. "I'll give you a ride."

"No thanks."

"Emily asked me to give you a ride."

"Emily?"

"She asked me if I saw you to give you a ride home. She saw a different movie with Kyle."

A ride would have been nice, but I didn't want to get one from Will. "I'm running home." I tried to sound authoritative. "Thank you for offering."

As I turned to run, I didn't notice that I had backed into a huge white SUV. Will caught my arm, opened a door to this same SUV, and said, "She also said that I might need to use force if necessary. I thought she was kidding."

I plopped down on the leather seat behind the drivers'. Ian squished next to me with the little blond girl on his lap.

"You know, Red." Ian said. "The movie wasn't a comedy."

"Yeah," I shrugged. "But there were too many slow motion scenes. It was ludicrous. The last one was the worst."

"I don't think I would have agreed with you if someone in the theater wasn't laughing. Somebody spilt candy in the middle of it as well."

I swallowed. Knowing that Will knew I spilt my lovely starburst jelly beans, I felt as if I needed to confess. "That was me, too." _I guess I ruined the movie for everybody._

"That was you?" Ian laughed and leaned in to whisper in my ear moving the blond in his lap with him. "No wonder you see movies by yourself. Bring scissors next time." The blond laughed.

"I'm glad I didn't pay full price for that one." A beautiful brunet boy said who sat behind me with his arm around a beautiful brunet girl. "I thought it would be better. I can't believe Kyle liked it."

"Sometimes the mood of the theater plays a large part on how much people like it." Will said.

"Gee, thanks, Red." Ian scoffed and slapped my thigh with the back of his hand.

"I tried to hold it, but you got to admit…what were John Doe and the other guy doing with machetes in Manhattan."

"No one else was laughing."

"I tried covering my mouth." I even demonstrated in front of Ian. At that, he pulled his head back and laughed causing the cute blond in his lap to bounce up and down…as if I needed anything else to make me feel ten years younger.

I gazed out the window the rest of the way home. I regretted wearing sweats and a hat and hated being stuffed into a car full of beautiful people wearing designer slacks. Beneath the chit-chat, I was comforted by the strains of the U2 and mumbled the words to myself.

In sacrament meeting the next day, the first counselor in the Bishopric announced that there was ward business. My face flushed. _What if Will was my FHE co-leader?_

"We'd like to call Will Grandison as…" I held my breath as I felt Will stand behind me. "…a Sunday School teacher." I exhaled and sustained him. "We'd also like to call Ian Laird as an FHE co-leader." I smiled as I sustained him as well. _This could be interesting._

During Sunday School, Will gave his first lesson. He transformed before my eyes from the quiet, haughty man in the corner with a deadly gaze to the awesome orator and discussion leader with a relaxed countenance who taught with the Spirit. I looked around me. Everyone had their scriptures opened and their eyes were fixed on Will as he spoke. It had been a while since the majority of our Sunday School class had been so attentive.

Near the end of the lesson when my thoughts were deep in processing our class discussion, what he had said, and the scriptures we had read, I raised my hand to give a comment while Will was asking a basic question. As his eyes meet mine, his gaze hardened a touch, and I completely forgot my comment. He said with an attempt at a polite smile, "Red, that question wasn't meant to be answered."

"Oh." I blushed, but smiled. "Was it a rhetorical question?"

While some people in the classroom chuckled, Will looked at his watch and said, "Go ahead and make your comment."

"Um…" I said. I really had no idea what my comment was anymore. Will looked at his watch again, and my blush reddened. "Never mind…You go on." He immediately bore his testimony and ended the lesson. After the closing prayer, he transformed back into the guy whose jaw never relaxes and brow never de-furrows, but the moment he and all the guys left the girls alone for Relief Society, I heard multiple girls exclaim, "He is so hhhhhhot."

Later that day, the apartment 14 girls came over to play games bearing cookies with them. In the middle of Apples to Apples, a knock on the door came. All the girls except for Emily looked at me and laughed.

"Are you expecting anyone, Red?" Erin asked with a smirk.

Rebecca couldn't resist. "Yeah, anyone in plaid."

I opened the door revealing Ian and Will still looking good in white shirts and ties.

"Hey partner!" Ian cried. "We were home teaching next door, and I said to myself, 'Self, I need to talk to my lovely FHE partner.' So I ask you now, partner…can we talk?"

"Sure. Come on in."

As six girls melted in front of them, Ian smiled and said, "I'm your new Daddy, girls." The girls giggled, and Will rolled his eyes.

"Let's do it at the table." I said.

While Will declined the invitation to play Apples to Apples with six giggly girls and Emily, Ian and I sat at the kitchen table to discuss an FHE game plan.

"Well," Ian started. "We might as well do it at our place tomorrow."

"I agree." I said.

"The activity won't be creative, though. We can play pool or Mario Cart."

"Sound's good."

"Will! Could you give the lesson tomorrow?" Ian looked between Will and me and added with a laugh, "just be careful with your rhetorical questions."

Will looked up from the spot he made himself on the floor as far away from Apple to Apple as he could get. He nodded, "Can do," and went back to reading from the Ensign in his hand.

We conjured up a few ideas for activities, but Ian didn't seem satisfied with it.

"We could add some service projects." I suggested.

"That's it!" Ian cried. "Girls," opening it up for discussion, "What do you suggest for service projects."

"Let's have a dance!" exclaimed Katie.

I winced. "That's not exactly a service."

"We could have a dance at a nursing home." added Sarah. "My cousin work's at one. I could talk to him about it."

"How about a St. Patrick's Day dance!" Katie cried.

"That could work." Ian smiled.

"Sarah, just let Ian or I know if we can. Then, we'll work it out from there." I said. I wasn't so sure how it would work, and…I never liked going to nursing homes. In fact, I had a phobia of very old people.

After Ian and I finished up, the girls begged Ian and Will to play a round with them. Ian didn't need persuading, but Will finally relented. Before the cards were dealt, a knock came to the door.

"Come in!" the girls yelled.

The door rolled open revealing Zach Newman…pale and sheepish. The girls giggled and cried. "Hey, Zach!…Zach!…Fancy to see you here!"

"Hey, Zach." I said, "I didn't see you at church."

"Did you miss me?" Zach smiled.

I definitely didn't help the awkward silence by blushing to the shade of hot tamales and staring open mouthed at Zach for at least 20 seconds. Someone coughed, and I meet Will's eyes which urged me to go outside. _Can someone really do that with their eyes_?

"Zach," I stood up, walked outside, and closed the front door. "We…we need to talk."

"Yeah," Zach grinned wider. "You want to come to my place? No one's there."

"No!" I said that too loudly. I lowered my voice. "I mean I'd rather talk here."

"Oh."

"Zach, um." I cleared my throat. "Look. You're a great guy, but I'm…"

"You're a good egg." Zach interrupted, "and you look really pretty with your hair up and how your makeup looks now."

"Wait. Zach, let me finish."

"Your makeup isn't overdone like other girls. You even look good without it. That's a plus. Just let me say that I really admire you." Zach blushed. "You're very Christ-like, and you'll be a great mother one day."

"Uh, Zach…wait."

"Do you want to start a…" He paused for dramatic effect. "…relationship?"

I let it out too fast. "Iamnotinterestedinyouasmuchasyourintersetedinme."

"What?"

I took a deep breath. "I am not interested in you."

Zach at first looked crestfallen, but then he lightened to a smile. "You're playing hard to get, aren't you?"

"No, Zach. I'm…I'm serious. I'm not interested in you. I'd say let's just be friends, but I don't think that would work between us. I don't like you as much as you like me."

"I know," Zach smirked, "but that can change."

Zach left me standing dazed for a second before I ran after him, I whispered as forcefully as I could. "I don't like you…like that!"

All I heard from him was, "I know!"

_Shoot._

I don't how long I sat outside the door…thinking. I knew that I had to go back inside eventually. I walked through the front door with my eyes down. They hushed as I walked passed the Apples to Apples game into the kitchen to get a drink of water. _Why can't they a least act like they didn't hear what Zach and I said?_

"Do you want to play?" asked Emily following me to the kitchen. "Will won. We're playing for second."

"Could you hear us outside?" I whispered.

Emily paused before lowering her own voice to say, "We couldn't hear what you were saying, but we heard Zach."

"Oh." My attention unconsciously went to the game. Everyone except for Will was taking turns looking at me. I just noticed that Will was sitting on a kitchen table near us reading the Ensign.

"He probably would have believed you if you told him a while ago." His head was still bent over the Ensign as he said it, but he looked up when he felt the heat of my gaze.

The front door opened. "Red?" a female voice called. I looked and saw Petra Maxwell in a navy jumper (tent) with her dark locks wildly curling out of her head like Medusa's snakes. Even though saying Medusa paints an evil picture, Petra served, worked, and smiled like an angel. "Red! You said you wouldn't forget. We scheduled it three weeks ago. You said that you'd write it down!"

"What are you taking about?"

She released a sigh. "Visiting Teaching!"

"Oh, I'm sorry, Petra!" I slammed down my cup and ran out the door.


	9. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Emily and I shared the rest of the girls' excitement and anticipation to enter "the house" for the first time that Monday night. Ian's parents owned "the house," and each of Ian's five older bothers lived in it during their post mission bachelorhood.

Ian took us on a tour…noting his older brothers' contributions to the place as if he were a king recounting the improvements each of his predecessors made to the castle. To his oldest brother, "the house" owed the collection of 8 recliners along with the ridiculously enormous white screen in the media room. For the remaining brothers in descending order, the additions included the pool and foosball tables, the hot tub, the outdoor grill/gazebo, and the huge plasma TV in the basement. Ian being the last in his family line felt he didn't need to add much more than a queen sized "love sack." Yes, "the house" with its two stories and furnished basement was large and over the top to say the least for any group of college students.

The media room might have been at one time two rooms, a living room and family room or dining room on the main floor. One of its wall shelved every video game in every video game medium known to man, and the opposite wall stored masses of VHS's that tapered into masses of DVD's. The eight recliners lined up in two rows, two in the front along side a large couch of the same design and the rest in back. The love sack lay between the recliners and the big screen as if it were a pool of water.

After singing an opening hymn and an opening prayer for FHE, Will transformed into his approachable teacher mode for five or so minutes to give a lesson about the teaching with the Holy Ghost. When he was finished and turned back to his unapproachable mode, Katie asked or thought out load, "How do you teach so well?" Silence followed the question because Will apparently didn't feel he needed to answer the question and the girls really did want to know before starting the Mario Cart tournament. Kyle coughed and nudged Will in the ribs.

"I just finished a lesson on Teaching with the Holy Ghost." Will said obviously trying to hold on to his patience. "I pray and listen for the Holy Ghost to help me as I prepare and speak."

"Oh," said Katie.

Everyone sat reflecting until Ian started rubbing his hands together. "Let the tournament begin."

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

I spent the week looking forward to my tutoring session with Cooper McCoy while dodging Zach Newman left and right. However, dodging must have triggered Zach's "playing hard to get" theory. He smiled when he saw me, and to my everlasting shame, I smiled back. It showed progress that he wasn't talking to me, or…so I thought.

While walking through the BYU bookstore staring at Easter and St. Patrick's Day décor, I bumped into something hard.

"Sorry," I said looking down.

"It's hard to believe that people's apologies are sincere when they're looking at their feet." I would recognize that low voice anywhere.

I meet Cooper's smiling eyes with a blush. I squeaked, "Hey!" and then cleared my throat. "Hey, Cooper."

As a smile broadened on his face showing off his famous dimple, he said, "I saw you at Movies 8 on Saturday. You were with quite the crowd."

I swallowed. My mission to exit the theater incognito apparently failed. At least, he didn't bring up what I was wearing that night. Then again, I didn't look much better in front of him at that moment…sporting no make-up, hair loosely pulled back, and a t-shirt that read in bold all-caps, "I LIKE MATH." Moreover, I couldn't come up with anything brilliant to say other than, "Yeah."

"You don't often see people wearing their Athletic Dep. sweats to the dollar theater. You might be staring a new trend."

I debated whether Cooper was laughing with me or at me. "I shoot for comfort at theaters."

"Cute and comfortable." He said. "I couldn't pull that off."

I laughed uncomfortably. "I'd like to see you try." _Did I just say that?_

He responded with a crooked smile and asked, "So, Friday?"

"Yeah, bright and early at 7:45?"

"In the library."

I nodded. "See you then."

"Bye."

Despite all the smiles from Zach that I endured that week, I maintained a good mood. Even the animosity radiating from Will Grandison's glare, which I saw every once in a while on campus, didn't dampen my spirits. I contently chanted over and over…_I'm seeing Cooper on Friday, I'm seeing Cooper on Friday…_ When the end of the week finally arrived, I followed the same morning ritual as I did the week before. I didn't want to be too obvious about dressing only to attract Cooper's particular attention, but I wasn't sure if that could be avoided. My little brother, Allen, who's three years younger than me in everything except for sense, maturity, and logic, told me that boys don't read into clothing like girls believe they do, but I was not convinced. Conversely to what he had said, however, Allen said that I was too obvious for my own good when I wanted a guy's attention. Well, I tried to forget Allen for the moment and beautified myself.

When I meet Cooper on Friday morning, I couldn't keep a straight face for the life of me. _I should take lessons from Will._ As soon as I saw him wearing Athletic Dep. sweat pants and a white tee holding the Athletic Dep. hoodie in hand, my face light up. This time, he made his impression of a cat walk turn and asked, "So, can I pull it off?"

"You don't need to ask."

He raised an eye brow.

"Cute and Comfortable." _And indisputably hot._

He smiled. _He knows he's hot._ "Well, shall we?" He said while walking to a table where his books were already placed with his homework already done, ready to go over.

_Wow._

That night, a very plaid Zach stopped by my apartment…much to my chagrin.

"What's up?" I said.

"You want to go to a movie with me tonight?" Zach asked.

"No."

"Just asking." said he.

I shut the door on his ear to ear grin.

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

On Saturday, I ran away again. Homework? Schromework. I ran to Barns and Noble on University Pkwy and spent the day reading children's picture books.

While searching for mice in _The Eleventh Hour_, I fell asleep. I felt something wet and cold sliding around my face…disturbing my slumber. I opened my eyes to find two strange wet blobs.

"HO GEE COW!" I cried scrambling out of the arm chair falling to the floor. While laughter filled my ears, I found ice cubes around me. I looked up to see Ian holding a topless McDonalds drink while laughing uncontrollably. Everyone else, Kyle, Emily, the blond, the brunet, and some other guy I hadn't ever seen, weren't hiding their glee at my expense either. Will, however, glared. I cried, "What did I do to you?" Everyone laughed harder (if that seemed possible). They thought I was talking to Ian…which was okay because I meant to keep that comment to myself. "What are you guys doing here?"

"Giving you a Saturday night." Ian said helping me up.

Emily shook her head. "I knew you'd be here. We're going bowling."

"I don't have any money." I said.

"We'll take care of that." Kyle said.

"I haven't eaten anything."

"Taken care of, Miss Ramena Noodles." Ian said holding a McDonalds bag along with the topless McDonalds drink. "Chicken nuggets and fries were a safe bet, right?"

_Why don't they just leave me alone? Normal people would do that. Will obviously would have done that._

As my dad needs a couple days notice before my mom serves liver for dinner, I would like a couple days to digest the idea of going bowling. It's not that I hated bowling as my dad hated liver. I just wished that bowling a 68 was as good as shooting a 68 in golf. I had done both, but it would be more awkward for me to say no to free dinner and bowling with a group of people that drove to Barns and Noble to find me only to drive back to Fat Cats on University and Bulldog.

"Right," I said. "Thanks."

The best part about bowling aside from the shoes was watching people's reactions to what they did. Ian displayed the most body movement in his successes and disappointments although Kyle's back flip after making three strikes in the tenth frame to barely beat out Will was impressive. Seth, the new guy who turned out to be Ian's cousin, took the role of the "high fiver" giving one to everyone no matter what they did. Emily, Tiffany (the blond), and Britney (the brunet) would warp their triumphs and failures into a dance move to the music. Will, on the other hand, would stand up, pick up his ball, roll a strike, and then sit down. After six strikes in a row, however, Will sort of smiled to Kyle.

For me, my reactions were similar to Will's except I didn't roll any strikes. After 8 frames, I had accumulated a score of 50 points or pins or whatever.

"Alright, Red." Ian squatted in front of me in a coaching position. "I want you to head to the lane with a vision in mind. See the ball rolling. See the pins falling over. See it, Red."

I nodded.

"You're going to break 60 this next turn, right?"

I nodded.

"Now, get to it." He said and slapped me on the shoulder.

I nodded and stood up…probably taking Ian more seriously than I should have, but…hey…desperately awkward times call for desperately awkward measures. As I visualized my shot, I couldn't get the visual of me…turning around and rolling the ball through my legs…out of my mind. I inhaled and exhaled slowly before turning my back to the lane.

"What are you doing?" Ian asked.

"Trust me!" I cried. "I know what I'm doing."

Everyone, except for you know who, cracked up laughing. I bent over, re-visualized my shot from the upside down position and then rolled the ball through my legs down the lane. The ball moved slowly, but knocked over every pin. A roar of cheers, screams, and applause erupted, and I raised my hands in triumph. While waiting for everyone to stop laughing, I thanked Ian for the peep talk that inspired the strike. I'm not sure if he heard me, but he picked me up in a bear hug (which, thankfully, cracked my back…I needed that). It took a while for everyone except Will to compose themselves to resume play in both our lanes. I finished last out of the eight of us with a 68.

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At the end of church the next day, my visiting teaching companion, Petra, ran into me while I was walking with my roommates.

"Let's make our appointments. I'll be out of town in two weeks. Can we do it next week?" Petra said.

"I'm open. I'll hunt down our sisters and give you a call."

"We'll meet you at the car." said Emily.

It didn't take me long to find and make appointments with those I visit taught, and once done I headed out to the parking lot. As I weaved through the cars to get to mine, I bumped into Zach Newman who brightened when he saw my face.

"Red!" Zach cried with excitement.

"Hey, Zach." I said. He was blocking my way through two parked cars. I turned around to go through the next opening between cars. However, Zach countered my movement and was still in my way.

"Red, we need to talk."

"Not now. We're in the middle of a parking lot, and my roommates are waiting for me by my car."

"I need to talk to you now. It's about us."

"No, Zach." I sighed. "I told you last week that…"

"But I want to marry you." Zach interrupted. My limbs froze, and a cry of "Nooooooooooooooooo" ran through my head. However, Zach took advantage of my initial shock to continue. "You see, Red. I've prayed and prayed. I've prayed to let the woman that I'm going to marry meet me in this parking lot. And here you are."

"There are a lot of girls in the parking lot right now."

Zach was undeterred. "You're the one I want to marry. We'd be perfect together. I'd be good for you, and you'd be a wonderful mother."

"Stop, Zach." I walked closer to him to push my way through the cars. "I…"

He held a finger to my lips. "I'm worthy to take you to the temple. You can't take a marriage proposal from a worthy priesthood holder lightly."

I quickly put my hand on his chest and pushed him through. I ran ahead, but he physically cut me off, again.

"I will not be discouraged easily." He said.

"I will not change my mind." I retorted. "I don't want to marry you. I told you last week I wasn't even interested. I never play hard to get."

"But you are."

"I'm not. I promise that I just want you to leave me alone." I tried walking away, again, but he grabbed hold to my wrist.

"What about all of those times we went to the First Presidency Christmas devotionals together?" He asked.

"I was being selfish." I said looking down.

"What about all those beautiful smiles you gave me?"

"I have a bad habit of smiling at people."

He knelt down in front of me. "I love you, Red."

"You don't even know my first name."

He looked confused, but set my comment aside. "You have to marry me. I'm a good man. I'll be wonderful to you. We'll have a celestial marriage."

As I looked down on him, my dream of him flashed before my eyes—his plaid suit at our wedding, our newborn wrapped in swaddling plaid clothes, and our seven children wearing plaid to church. It was too much. "There's more to live than just plaid!" I cried. I flicked his plaid tie in his face. "I don't want a plaid husband! I don't want plaid children!"

After I closed my mouth, I regretted my words, but I couldn't take them back. They were out, and I had yelled them. While he gaped up at me from his knees, we heard bursts of laughter to my right. We both turned to find Kyle, Ian, Will, Emily, Jenna, and Katie enjoying our tête-à-tête.

"Why did you guys choose the parking lot to talk?" Katie asked.

"And specifically behind my car?" A random guy behind me said while waiting to back out his car. To my left were more people, people from our ward, with bemused and amused looks on their faces.

"Uh!" I yelled at the sky and stomped toward my car.

"I won't bother to ask you again!" Zach cried behind me. "You shouldn't turn your back on a chance at eternal life! I'm worthy to take a lucky girl to the temple! I might be your last shot! How do you know anyone else will ask you?"

His words triggered my legs to run. As soon as I sat behind my steering wheel, I slammed my door closed and screamed, "I still have my agency!"

4 ½ hours later…Ring, Ring, Ring

"Hello?"

I gasped. A guy's voice was answering our apartment phone. "Is Emily there?"

"She's handling raw chicken at the moment." the voice answered.

"Kyle?" I guessed.

"Red?"

I heard Emily's voice in the background, "Red? Where is she?"

"Where are you, Red?" Kyle asked.

"I'm at my grandma's." I said, and Kyle relayed the message.

"What!" I heard Emily cry. "In St. George!"

"Yeah," I said to Kyle. I heard water rushing and then Emily's voice.

"Are you okay?"

"I needed to drive…to think. I'm fine. Grandma about had a stroke when she saw me, though."

"I can't imagine why." Emily exhaled into the phone.

"I'm sorry, Emily." Tears escaped my eyes, but I tried to keep my voice steady. "You were right about Zach. I was stupid. Now the whole ward knows." I couldn't control my voice anymore. "I wish that I could disappear…or transfer to Snow College."

I heard a door close which hopefully meant she was alone in our room. "Don't say that. In a couple of weeks everyone will stop talking about it. In a couple of months, you'll be able to laugh about it."

"In a couple of decades, Zach will stop cursing my name."

"You don't know that. It might be sooner."

"I shouldn't have said that…about the plaid."

"Probably not, but…" She failed to suppress a giggle. "You should have seen your face as you said it."

"How much did you guys hear?"

"That was the first we heard…about the plaid. We weren't exactly sure what was going on until…" She breathed deeply, "until we heard what he said after that."

"What if he's right? What if I won't get another chance to marry?"

"Red, do you want him to be your husband?"

"No."

"Then that's the risk you're going to have to take, but Red…" She paused. "You're 22. Yeah, that might be old for BYU marriage standards, but that's still considered young outside the bubble. Besides, it's not a commandment that one must find a husband in Provo…thank goodness."

"True."

"Don't forget we're in this together. I'm not married either if you haven't noticed."

"Not yet anyway."

"Hey!" She cried. I could see her blushing 240 miles away.

"When's Kyle going to ask?"

"We haven't been on a one-on-one date since the movies."

"Why is he over, then? I didn't hear anyone else when Kyle answered the phone."

"Everyone else is coming soon. We're having dinner at our place which you'd be enjoying too if you were here. Will drove everyone to pick up some food from 'the house' and probably will bring back Britney and Tiffany as well." I heard Emily's bed creek. "Hey, I need to get going. When are you coming back?"

"When Grandma kicks me out…which is probably in an hour."

"Are you sure you'll stay awake on the way home?"

"Grandma always hands me a Mountain Dew as she kicks me out the door in case of emergency."

"Are you going to tell your mom about Zach?"

"Not unless she asks if I'd gotten any marriage proposals lately. My Grandma's sworn to secrecy."

Emily laughed. "I couldn't keep stuff like that from my mom. Hey…I really got to go."

"Thanks, Em. Tell Kyle to hold your hand. I'm dying for some M&Ms. Ice cream would be nice, too."

"Ha. Ha." Emily said. "Drive safe."

"Yeah, see ya."

"Bye."

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The clock on the lab computer that I was on read 6:48 pm. FHE was going to start in twelve minutes. I would hear what they had to say about the "Zach proposal" whether I liked it or not. They wouldn't hold anything back (knowing Ian). _What would Will say? _To go or not to go…that was the question. I alternated my gaze between the delete key and the backspace button wishing that one of them could erase time for a do-over. _Cheese!_ The clock read 6:51. I wouldn't be able to hide from my FHE group for ever. Besides, I was the FHE group co-leader for heaven's sake.

At 6:52, I logged off my computer and headed home.

When I opened my door to my apartment, I beheld five guys standing in the middle of the front room watching what sounded like ESPN…all wearing plaid. The guys apparently enlightened the twins about the situation. One by one their faces turned toward mine, and they all broke into laughter. All the girls were already there, too, giggling.

"You don't know what you're missing, Red." Ian said, "When you turn your back on plaid."

"I'm going back to school!" I cried while turning to head out the door, but Ian caught my arm and dragged me back in.

"Oh, come on, Red." Ian said.

"There's more to life than just plaid!" Kyle cried with his arms flaring about like an actor in the Manti or the Hill Camorra pageant.

Jenna finished with the same arm movement. "I don't want a plaid husband! I don't want plaid babies!"

"Did you seriously have dreams about that?" Jason asked.

I stared daggers at my roommates. Jenna and Emily pointed at Katie who giggled and cried. "She would cry out in horror."

Everyone laughed except me. I said, "Don't make fun of this. I shouldn't have said those things. They were horrible."

"You got through to him, though." Will said.

"Apparently, he's experimenting with different patterns." Kyle added.

"He wore vertical strips today in class." Will said.

Ian smiled. "Maybe, next week he'll sample solids."

Will said. "Maybe I should lend him some."

All the guys, except Will, laughed, but the girls gapped at Will before joining the laughter.

My embarrassment couldn't hold back my laughter anymore, but the laughter turned into those stupid, stubborn tears.

"Red," Ian said. "How about a hug?" He lifted me off my feet and squeezed. Every connection in my spine cracked, and I started laughing again.

"Whoa. Was that your back?" Ian asked laughing.

"Yeah."

"Feel better?"

I nodded.

"Well, start FHE. It's your week to conduct."

As I started, I was distracted by the ooos the girls were giving the guys while they took off their plaid shirts revealing…don, don, don, daaaa…t-shirts underneath.

While everyone else played games after the lesson, I snuck away to the kitchen to have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and ice cream. I didn't notice a shadow behind me, watching me, until I put everything away. I turned to see Will with an eyebrow raised.

"What?" I asked.

Without a word, Will walked to the refrigerator, opened it, and took out the ice cream and peanut butter. After he put the ice cream in the freezer where it should have gone in the first place, he replaced the jam with the peanut butter in the cupboard and put the jam in the refrigerator. When he was finished rearranging my mess, Will faced me again with an eyebrow still raised.

"I…" I started. "Just…just give me a few days."

"You drove to St. George and back yesterday?"

_Why does he need to ask? _I sat down at the kitchen table and took a bite of sandwich while Will's infamous gaze analyzed my profile.

He said, "This didn't have to happen."

I shoved a spoonful of ice cream in my mouth.

"Think next time." He said.

"Next time?" I repeated.

"Next time a guy show's interest in you. Guys like to be told outright when a girl doesn't like him."

"I told Zach."

"You were a little late."

"How was I supposed to know?"

"That's why I'm telling you to think."

I took another bite of sandwich.

"And paying attention to what's going on around you wouldn't hurt either." He said with one of his microscopic hints of a smile.

"Thank you for your advice." I said and stomped to my room to finish my dinner in peace.


	10. Chapter 9

A/N: D.I. is a thrift store run by the LDS Church.

Chapter 9

The kitchen table in "the house" resembled the long slab tables and benches in western movies. While Ian and Emily sat across from me scrolling through what Ian had on iTunes, Will sat on the far end of the table typing at a maddening pace on his own laptop. Kyle must have been still setting up the x-box for Jenna and Katie. We were over at "the house" to watch a Friday night movie, but Ian wanted to pick a playlist for next week's St. Patrick's Day dance before we started the movie. Emily was more on top of new music than I was, so she helped Ian more than I did. I just made sure that there was a healthy balance of Josh Groban songs vs. other slow songs. However…as always, I wasn't really paying attention.

"Red." Emily's voice said. "Red!"

"What?" I moved my focus from the refrigerator back to Emily.

"You're loosing it faster than you usually do! Who are you thinking about?"

"What?"

"You never get that dense unless you're thinking about someone?"

"Is Red smitten?" Ian looked up from his laptop revealing a crooked smile.

"You're blushing, Red." Emily teased.

"Tell us." Ian said with eager eyes. "Who's the lucky guy?"

"I'm not just thinking about one person." I said. It wasn't a lie. In addition to Cooper, I was thinking about this guy in my Pearl of Great Price class who forgot to shave this morning. _Ho Gee Cow! Did he look hot or what!!_ Oh…and then there was this guy in the Athletic Dept. weight room. _Ode to the perks of being an ex-athlete! Those abs one sees are priceless._

"Interesting. I never thought you a player, Red." Ian smirked. "Start naming them then?"

I rolled my eyes.

Ian persisted in getting some sort of answer. "What's your type?"

I wasn't going to satisfy him, but Emily had to answer, "She's a romantic…looking for someone tall, dark, and handsome."

"What? Like Will?" Ian asked.

The three of us turned toward Will who didn't even blink or remove his gaze from his computer screen. Emily, the traitor, said, "Exactly."

"Will." Ian called.

"What?" Will called back…still typing.

"Would you go out with Red?"

I kicked Ian under the table, but neither he nor Will flinched.

"She's not my type." Will responded.

Ian threw back his head and laughed. "Why not, Will? She's cute and hot when she wants to be. And she's Red. What more could you want?"

I wished my checks didn't burn so easily. _Why can't Ian shut-up?_

"I don't date red heads." said Will…again without moving his eyes from his laptop.

"Hmmm." Ian titled his head. "Yeah, but is that all that's keeping you?" Ian smiled at me. "I think you still have a chance with him, Red, if you work it."

"I'm fine if I don't." I said.

"You give up too easily."

"He's not the only tall, dark and handsome guy out there."

"Yeah, but he's Will Grandison, the mastermind, the non-blond James Bond without the extensive history with women…"

"Who doesn't date red heads." I added. _And has a stick up his pants._

"What are you guys talking about?" Kyle asked while walking toward Emily.

"Will and Red." Emily said.

Kyle shook his head. "Will doesn't date red heads."

"But Kyle," Ian said raising a finger to make a point. "If Red were to…you know what I mean…and…" He lifted his eye brows a couple of times, and continued, "…you know what I mean, then Will would...you know."

Kyle split his focus between Will and me, and shrugged. "It could happen. Red's got it in her. She's even done it a couple of times, but I doubt Will really would."

Emily and I looked at each other with wrinkled brows. She asked me. "Did you follow that?"

I shook my head.

Ian and Kyle both sent a cautious glance toward Will who had closed his laptop and walked out the kitchen. "Nice going, man." Kyle slugged Ian in the shoulder.

Ian apologized, "Don't stay that I didn't try, Red. I don't think it'll happen."

"I wasn't interested in him to begin with." I said.

"We've been trying to set him up for a while." Ian laughed.

"Really?" _Why would Will need help with that? Well, he does need a personality change._

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Ring, Ring, Ring! If you haven't gathered already, I didn't have a cell phone then.

"Hello?" _Who would call at 8:27 Saturday morning?_

"Gooooood Mooorning, Red!"

"Ian?"

"The greatest FHE partner you've ever known!"

"What's up?"

"I wanted to call you before you ran off anywhere this fine Saturday. You up for a party?"

"A what?"

"A P-A-R-T-Y!"

"Uh-huh."

"Come on, Red! You've got to sound more excited than that." I held the phone away from my ear to let out Ian's laugh. "Emily and Kyle have a hot date tonight. Katie and Jenna found guys fresh of the mish. Will's fallen of the face of the earth. I think he slept in the CADEM lab last night, so it'll just be you, me, and Brit-n-Tiff. You game?"

"Whose party is it?"

"Ah, you know…a friend of a friend of a friend." Ian paused. "I actually think it's a birthday party for somebody's girlfriend, but we'll see. It'll be fun."

"What should I wear?"

"Red, I'm a guy. You don't ask me that. I'll have Brit-n-Tiff call you."

_That'll be interesting._

Ring, Ring, Ring.

"Hello?"

"Is this Red?"

_Yes, I have no life. I am the only one home._ "Yeah."

"It's Tiffany."

"Hey. What's up?"

"Ian said that you don't have anything to wear to the party tonight."

"He said that?"

"Yeah. We'll take you shopping."

"Oh. You and Britney?" I said.

"Yeah," she said slowly as if I was stating the obvious (which I was), "We'll pick you up in five. Ciao."

Click.

I said "Bye" out of habit.

Shopping with Brit-n-Tiff wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be. For starters, they laughed at my reaction when we pulled up to our shopping destination—Target. As we walked into the store, Tiffany and Britney walked on either side me as if we were friends already or they were wary that I'd run. It was hard to tell.

"You don't mind us dressing you, do you? It's like therapy for us." Tiffany asked.

"Uh…no," I said.

"We're getting something, too." Tiffany said as if that would relax me. "We usually go to D.I., but I don't have the patience required for such an excursion today. We wouldn't even have time to do alternations if needed."

"Target's easier." Britney said summing up.

Britney and Tiffany, while each trying on stuff for themselves, threw outfit after outfit at me. Through the changing, sorting, and throwing, the three of us got to know each other pretty well. Tiffany was a neuroscience major who was taking the MCAT in April. Britney whispered to me that Tiff had a photographic memory, but she would drop the med school idea as soon as "the one" swept her off her feet. Britney herself was studying chemical engineering. I immediately felt intimidated again being surrounded by two girls who were not only beautiful, but freakishly brilliant as well and who shopped at Target and D.I. for "new" clothes. The intimidation factor eased, though, as they gladly gave me fashion advice and talked about what was wrong with Al Gore's global warming movie.

"When in doubt, Red," said Britney. "Go with what's classic…the straight-legged neutral trouser and the low-neck tailored top with tank top underneath." She handed me the 32nd outfit over the dressing room door. "Show us, Red." She said impatiently, minutes later.

They whistled as I stepped out toward the mirror. Tiffany turned me around. "What a cute butt!"

That's not exactly what I wanted to hear, but the grey "trouser" gave me height, sophistication, and apparently a cute…rear. Top-wise, my golfing days left me uncomfortable in everything but V-necks, so the burgundy scup-neck took me some getting used to, and a white tank top hid what only my mother should see. I completely trusted Tiffany and Britney's judgment and…astonishingly…for the first time in casual dress, "I feel like a woman." I said.

"You should." Britney said while playing with my hair. "I have to do your hair. You know, people kill for this color."

"Do you ever wear make-up, Red?" Tiffany asked.

_Well, on Sunday and when I tutor Cooper. _"Twice a week." I said…a little too honestly.

"Hmm." She studied my face.

"What?" _What does 'Hmm' mean?_

A smile grew on her face. "I know some tricks that'll make you never want to go without make-up again."

_I doubt it. _I had laziness issues when it came to make-up, but then again…I don't know exactly what to do with an eyeliner pencil in my hand.

After they recommended other outfits and I spent more money than I should have (even at Target), we headed to Brit-n-Tiff's for hair and make-up.

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I was intimidated when I first entered the house with Ian and Brit-n-Tiff in the tree streets (east of campus) for the party, but Ian reassured me that I'd have fun if I stayed next to him. I took him more literally than what he probably meant. During the party, I never strayed more than two feet from him, but he didn't seem to mind. Britney and Tiffany didn't wander that far from him either, but I wondered what being constantly surrounded by a female blond, brunette and red head did to his social agenda. When I asked him about it, he said, "I'm with the hottest girls here what else could I want. It's my buddies I'm here to see. _If _I wanted different female attention, I would have gone solo or made sure Will and Kyle could have come, but where's the fun in that, knowing that I could have Red here with me." He picked me up in a hug and cracked my back for me.

His words surprised me. I never expected any guy besides Zach wanting me to stand next to him at party. Well…he had Brit-n-Tiff there, too. However, that's when I realized that Tiffany, Britney, and I (whether intentional or not) stood as bait or enticement to lure Ian's friends in his direction. Sure enough, groups and groups of guys approached where the four of us stood. The boys joked with Ian while flirting with Tiffany, Britney, and…to my surprise…me. I enjoyed the attention at first, but as the night drew on, I grew tired of giving phone numbers to guys who most likely wouldn't call, being told the line, "we should go golfing sometime," which was never backed up by a specific date and time, and the nodding and smiling I received when my listeners obviously didn't hear what I just said (a little taste of my own medicine).

Obviously, I wasn't the most practiced flirt because Brit-n-Tiff got dates out of it and I just got a bunch of smiles and nods. Once Ian sensed my discomfort and put a protective arm around me, the direct flirting and attention stopped. Tiffany and Britney were still going strong, though, so the guys didn't stop coming to talk to Ian. My role changed from bait to the tired red head leaning against him until Will Grandison unexpectedly came to the party. Immediately after he walked in the house, Will gave Ian and me a disapproving glance. Ian promptly dropped his arm from around me. I staggered to a surprisingly vacant love seat, and Will followed and sat by me.

"You know he doesn't mean anything by it." Will said without looking at me.

"What? Ian? Even though my naïveté might imply otherwise, I'm not the type of girl who thinks every touch from a guy means something. I needed the…" I continued hesitantly. "support and he…gave it to me. Besides if he did like me, we would have come to the party alone or gone somewhere else."

"Do you know that for sure?"

"No, but…" I didn't know what he implied by that. The question seemed to contradict the first thing he said. "Maybe you should tell Ian that I didn't mean anything by it either."

Will didn't respond. His potent gaze focused on the blank television across the room while I stared at him and the party whorled around us. When I finally gave up on getting a response from him, I noticed girls around the room looking in our direction. I don't blame them. He was a beautiful specimen of the opposite sex. I probably would have stared at him, too, but little did they know that he didn't have a beautiful personality to compliment his looks.

It wasn't until after I noticed Tiffany and Britney…in addition to other girls…curiously glance our way a couple of times that I wondered why he was sitting silently next to me and not laughing with Ian…or flirting with Brit-n-Tiff…or any of the other girls staring at him (if he ever really laughed…or flirted for that matter).

"Do you often go to these kinds of parties?" I asked him.

"No." He said.

"Why?"

He shrugged, but didn't answer.

"Why?" I asked again.

"Don't usually have the time."

"Oh." _Makes sense. He's an electrical engineering major._ _But then again…_ "What makes tonight different?"

He looked at me for a few seconds before turning back to the television screen. At long last, he said. "I needed the break."

"Oh."

From looking around the room, I noticed more and more girls sneaking glances at him. A couple of them even sent him flirtatious smiles his way. I turned to see his reaction, but I was disappointed...no reaction from him. His face never changed nor flinched. It made me curious.

"What is your type?" I asked. "…of girl, I mean."

Although he remained focused on the TV, he raised an eyebrow.

"No red heads. I got that much." I continued even though I doubted that he'd even answer if he didn't respond to my first try at the question. "How about Brit-n-Tiff or those girls that are over there smiling at you?"

As if I snapped my finger, his undivided attention turned toward me, but he still didn't answer.

"Try this question then," I nagged. "Why not red heads?"

He smirked. "Why do you want to know?"

I blushed. I didn't expect any reaction from him, but indifference and blankness. I said defensively, "Why can't I ask a simple question out of curiosity? Besides, you make it a point to get in my business, and you of all people should know that I'm not prying to see if I have a chance with you." I reddened even more when his smirk didn't disappear during my retort. _Jerk!_

"Do you know the relationship between those three?" He said motioning with his eyes toward Ian, Tiffany, and Britney.

"Tiffany explained a little before the party. She said it was a…sort of a symbiotic relationship. From watching them tonight, it's an interesting twist on friends with benefits."

"You seemed to enjoy it." That's when his smirk finally disappeared.

_Jerk! _Through clenched teeth, I said, "Sometimes a girl has a need to be girly and flirt, and some guys are more than willing to respond."

His focus returned to the blank television through the crowd, and I stared at him, waiting for a response. When I started to think that he'd stare at the TV until doomsday, he looked down as if a bug landed on his hand. "I'm not interested in meeting anyone at this party." He said.

"What are you doing here, then?"

"Haven't we established that already?"

"For a break…yes, but…don't you find any of them…attractive?" I couldn't help smiling.

He glared at me for a second before responding. "Attractive…yes. Enticing…no. They're all the same."

"You don't know that." I said.

"I'm not interested enough to find out if I'm wrong." He stood up, took a step forward, but abruptly turned back around. For a second, his hands were calm at his side, but then he rubbed them together and ran a hand through his hair just above his ear…all the while…his glare never left my face. I thought he was going to say something, but his lips formed a thin line, and he walked off to talk to Ian.

_What was that about?_

Directly after he left me seated by myself, I heard multiple people yell, "Cooper!" I looked over to the front door, and sure enough there stood my dreamy statistics pupil. Cooper's eyes searched the crowd greeting faces he knew. When his gaze met mine, a dimpled smile grew on his face, my lower stomach knotted, and he walked toward me. Wanting to help jump start my blood circulation again, I stood up to greet him, and he gave me a hug. He said, "You look hot."

"Yeah, I wish they had a fan in here." I said dazed and confused by his hug.

"No, I mean…well, it is hot in here, but…" He laughed. "You look good."

"Oh." _Brilliant, Kerstin._ I laughed and blushed. "Thank you."

"Sorry, I bailed on you yesterday for tutoring." He said. "I called, but you were already gone."

"It's fine. I got the message." I jumped when a hand grabbed my shoulder. Startled, I cried when I saw who it was. "Oh, Ian!"

"Are you ready to go?" He asked. I'd never seen Ian's expression before. _Angry? No, apprehensive._ All the usual mirth was gone from his face.

"What's up, Laird?" Cooper greeted him with a nod.

"What's up?" Ian's expression didn't change when he faced him.

"I can take her home." Cooper said facing me again with a smile.

Ian's eyes narrowed which made me nervous. I told Cooper, "Thanks, but I need to go home with Tiffany and Britney. I left some things at their place, and…" The blood drained from my face when I saw Will standing across the room. Will's eyes had never looked so…so evil—full of abhorrence and disgust. Cooper turned around to see what I was looking at. Through the crowd of people, I saw every muscle in Will's face, neck, arms, and chest stiffen and flex. Cooper faced me again. His smile had diminished slightly, and he asked, "Are we still on for Friday?"

I hesitantly smiled back and nodded, "Yeah."

"Cool. See ya then." He said before nodding to Ian and retreating toward the back of the house out of sight.

I felt Ian and Brit-n-Tiff close behind me as I walked toward Will who was now standing next to the front door. As I walked past him trying to avoid eye contact with him, he grabbed my arm and hissed, "How do you know him?"

Instinctively, I took a step backwards. I would have fallen if he wasn't still holding on to me. "I'm…I'm tutoring him in stats." I said.

He released me and rushed out the door. I followed him out, but headed for Ian's car while watching Will jump in his SUV and peal out.

"What was that about?" I asked Ian.

Ian scratched the back of his head. "It's not my place to say, Red. Ask Will about it when you get the guts."

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Well…church meant seeing Zach Newman for the first time since the proposal. You'd think that I would have seen him during the week. I thought so, too. Before his proposal, I would run into him everywhere in the Talmage Building…between classes, in the hallway of couches while studying, or near the vending machines, but not that week…he had completely disappeared…at least from my sight. It wasn't as if I was looking hard for him either. Looking back at that time, I laugh at myself for wasting so much time worrying what would happen if I did see him again, how he'd react when he saw me, and…worst of all…what I'd say if he tried proposing again. _He wouldn't do that. Would he?_ The dread nagged and gnawed at me that entire week, but the Friday night movie at "the house," shopping with Brit-n-Tiff, the party with Ian, Cooper calling me hot, and Will's reaction to seeing Cooper took my mind off Zach's marriage proposal episode for a bit. However, the panic of seeing Zach and facing everyone in the ward who had witnessed it hit me twenty minutes before church started that morning.

"Ouch!" I just wish that the panic didn't kick in while putting on mascara.

"Did you poke your eye out?" Katie asked.

"Almost." I said.

"You're hands are shaking." Katie put down her curling iron. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." I lied. I couldn't stop shaking.

"You're not having caffeine withdrawals, are you?" She laughed. "Should I turn you into the Honor Code Office for anything?"

I rolled my eyes, cleaned up the massive smudge in the corner of my eye, and tried to apply mascara again.

"Kidding…I'm kidding, Red, but stop before you hurt yourself again." Katie grabbed the mascara out of my hand and applied it for me. "I wonder if the whole ward knows about Zach's parking lot proposal by now. Apartment 14 knows, of course. We told someone in apartments 15, 16, 9, and 6 when we saw them on campus. We told the guys in apartment 4, yesterday. They almost died laughing." Katie giggled.

Yelling at Katie wouldn't have accomplished much…strangling wouldn't have either…maybe an outlet of energy, though…but I decided to bite my tongue instead…which hurt.

"Are you crying?" She asked.

"No." I don't think I was lying that time, but my tongue did hurt. I also wished that I didn't want to skip church that day.

"I'm proud of you, Red. You've been actually making an effort with your appearance more and more lately." She laughed. "Oh, next time invite Jenna and me when Brit-n-Tiff take you shopping. That outfit you wore last night…oh my gosh…you were smokin' hot when you came home. Gawl…I wish I saw you fresh. You said that Tiffany did your make-up? Do you think she'd teach me? Your smoky eyes were…"

That's when I stopped listening and started dreading the inevitable again, but I forced smiles and nods until she noticed that we had just seven minutes to get to church.

I avoided looking directly at anyone once Jenna, Katie, and I got there, but my ears didn't have an off switch. I heard muffled giggling and chattering from girls a couple rows behind me as I sat waiting for sacrament meeting to begin.

"Did she really yell that?"

"She flipped his plaid tie in his face as she said it."

"No way. That's so sad."

"She also had dreams about…"

"Poor Zach. Look at him. He's sitting alone in the back. Where are his roommates? That's so sad."

"You'd think at least he would wear a different tie."

"No, you shouldn't change something like that for just for a crush."

"It wasn't just a crush for him."

"But who would Zach be without his plaid tie?"

"Why did Red lead him on like that?"

"Wait, is that Will Grandison sitting with Zach?"

"No way. That's too sweet of him."

"No, he's not sitting with him, but Zach's getting up with him."

I turned around and saw Ian, Kyle, Will, and Zach walking together toward the front. Zach's sunken shoulders and lowered head contrasted mightily to the confident walk of the other three. I whirled back around when my eyes meet Will's glare. Kyle sat in the seat Emily was saving for him, but I felt Will, Ian and Zach sit behind me.

After sacrament meeting, Sunday School didn't start right away.

"Where's Will Grandison, Ann?" Ron Lindsey, our Sunday School President said. "He's scheduled to teach today, right?"

"Yeah. I taught last week." Ann said. "I saw him in sacrament meeting."

"Maybe he's getting chalk."

"There's some already on the piano. Wait, aren't those his scriptures and manual?"

"Weird. Where is he?"

The door to the classroom flung open. Everyone's heads rose in anticipation, but dropped again when Ian walked in smiling.

After he sat next to me (I didn't get my window seat), he let out a booming laugh that caused the room to stir once more.

"What's so funny?" I asked him.

"You'll see." He said.

The door flung open again, and in walked Zach Newman…with his head held high…a changed man from just an hour and a half ago. _What made the change?_ As if answering my question, he held a look of perseverance and touch his…his solid red tie. Quite a few gasps and giggles were heard amongst the on lookers, and not soon after, Will Grandison rushed into the room.

"Alright," Ron started. "Welcome to Sunday School. Natalie Lambert will give our opening prayer."

After the prayer, Will stood up and said, "Today, we're discussing the parables of the lost sheep, the lost piece of silver, and the prodigal son in Luke chapter 15." As he said this, he buttoned up his suit coat over a…over a plaid tie.

"He didn't." I gasped.

"Recognize it, Red." Ian smirked.

"Is that Zach's tie Will has on?" Jenna giggled on the other side of me.

Ian nodded, and Jenna started whispering to Katie.

"He didn't." I said again.

"You know how some guys really get into trading ties on the mission?" I shook my head.

"Well anyway," he whispered while Will was starting the lesson. "The fad stops when you get home, but Will and the Newmanaider were randomly talking about it. Don't ask me how, but looking at you…it doesn't surprise me too much."

"What?"

"Anyway…Newman asked Will if he could trade ties with him sometime. Will said sure, but then Newman goes, 'Can we do it now?' and then Will goes, 'Now?' Then the Newmanaider gives him this sheepish grin, and then…get this…Will just shrugs and starts taking off his tie." Ian paused to snicker. "Of course, they took it to the bathroom, but…" Ian laughed louder, and someone shushed us from behind.

"He didn't." I said all broken-record-like.

"Get used to it," Ian whispered in my ear. "Will's now the proud owner of the famous Newmanaider tie."

Even while Ian leaned across me to see where Jenna had her scriptures opened to, my eyes were glued to Will's new tie. _Who takes off his tie in the middle of church? Who trades ties in the middle of church? What's he mean by it? What are other people thinking about this? I'm the bad guy. Zach is the victim. Will saves the day by switching ties with him. Zach stands a little taller because he's wearing a tie of Will's. Zach's telling me or everyone that he's not the plaid husband I thought he'd be. It's just a stupid tie, Kerstin! Yeah, that's haunted me ever since those stupid plaid dreams started. If I could only just pull it off him…or cut it of…burn it…_ I abruptly stopped my mental ranting when I'd noticed that Will had stopped talking. Once again, his furrowed brow, his set jaw, and his gaze were all focused on me. Quite a few heads in front of me were turned around staring at me as well, and Ian elbowed me in the side.

"What I do?" I said.

A heard a couple giggles.

"You volunteered to read." Ian said.

"I…what?"

"You raised your hand to read."

"No I didn't."

"What does this mean, Red?" Ian raised his hand and laughed.

_I didn't literally try to take the tie off of Will from where I was sitting, did I?_

"Can I've another volunteer?" Will asked the class.

"Oh, I'll read it, Will." I said, but then blushed. "Where are we?"

He pointed to the blackboard where it read, "Luke 15:8-10."

I turned to it and started reading, but I noticed more heads turning in my direction and someone cleared his throat.

"Red." Will interrupted.

"What?" I said.

"Are you in Luke chapter 15 verses 8 through 10?" Will said slowly.

"Yeah."

"Red, you're in John." Ian laughed.

_Well, I thought I was._

"Here, use my Bible. It's open to Luke." Jenna offered.

"I've got a Bible." I said stubbornly, and few more people started laughing around me. _Why are they laughing at me?_ However, I did stop mindlessly flipping back to Luke (because I found myself wondering aimlessly in the Old Testament) and took the book from Jenna.

Will looked at his watch and sighed. I reddened, but read from the right chapter and the right verses in Luke…after Ian doubled checked on behalf of the rest of the class.

As I walked with Jenna, Katie, Emily, and Kyle back to my car after church, I stopped abruptly when I saw Zach leaning against my car. Jenna and Katie immediately started giggling.

"Guys, I think that I need a minute with him." I said.

"No problem." Kyle said.

"We'll wait here." Emily added.

"We totally understand." Jenna had to add something.

"You'll speak loud enough that I can hear you two, right?" Katie laughed.

I gave her a scowl before I continued rest of the way to Zach. As I approached him, he looked down at his red tie and stroked the bottom of it with his thumb and forefinger.

"Good Morning, Red." He looked at his watch. "I mean…afternoon."

"Hey." I swallowed. "What's up?"

"Not much." He swallowed as well. "Um…Red, I…I'm sorry about last week. I've been thinking about what I said…at the end of it, and…uh…I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, too." I said.

"I should've taken you seriously…about not playing hard to get." Zach started rubbing the tie again. I'd be rubbing it, too. It looked like silk.

I nodded and looked at the floor. "I should have said something earlier."

"No." Zach said. "It's…no."

"I did enjoy going to the Christmas Devotionals with you, though."

"I did, too." Zach smiled. "You are a good egg, Red. I'll always think that."

I smiled. "And you're a good guy. Remember that."

Zach stared at me for a second, and his whole countenance fell. He said in a whinny voice. "Then why won't you…"

Someone cleared his throat.

"Oh, what's up, Will!" Zack's smile returned. "Thanks for trading ties with me."

"No problem." He said…without a trace of expression on him.

_Why didn't I notice him standing next to me?_

Zach looked at the ground a bit before looking back at Will with a sheepish grin. "Will…um…my mom made me that tie, and I…"

Will had already taken the tie off and was handing it to Zach.

"Gee…thanks." Zach's face fell, though, when he look down at the red tie he had on.

"You can keep it, man." Will said.

Zach responded with his signature ear to ear grin and a hearty handshake. Once he skipped off, Will and I stared at each other for a second before he asked, "Why don't you pay attention when I teach Sunday School?"

I scowled. "I pay attention."

He raised an eyebrow.

"Okay, I tuned in and out, but I'm processing something that was said."

"What were you doing today when you raised you're hand? After I called on you to read, you were mouthing something. It looked like you were saying 'burn it?'"

"I…uh…" _How can I say this without lying? Avoid the question. Right…um…_ "What were you doing grabbing my arm like you did last night after you sent Cooper and I the death glare?"

Will took a step back as if I knocked him off balance, and he narrowed his eyes and swallowed. _I guess he didn't see that one coming._

"Will!" Ian shouted from where he was talking with Jenna, Katie, Emily, and Kyle. "I'm starving. Let's go!"

With his eyes still on me, Will took another step back before heading toward his car.


	11. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

At the last minute, the St. Patrick Day Dance at the nursing home fell through. We might have been able to pull it off, but Ian and I didn't try very hard. We decided to go to the nursing home on Monday night and have a dance at "the house" on Friday night. My roommates and apartment 14 looked forward to the nursing home, but I didn't add to their buzz of anticipation. Being around the elderly made me nervous. It's not that I thought that they were secretly children eating witches or world domination seeking wizards, but once you get old you're either a mind trapped in a decaying body or a deteriorating mind occupying a…well…decaying body. Moreover, the only remedy for a decaying body is death. That's depressing.

We all crammed into Will's SUV to head for the nursing home. Once we got there, the sophomores and Emily had brought nail polish and were painting nails and giggled with the elderly. While Kyle obviously was wherever Emily was, Ian was talking with two ladies who seemed to be flirting with him. I had no clue where Will went, but I sat nervously in the back until two old men beaconed to me to sit with them at a table.

"Have you played Parcheesi before?" One of them said as I sat down.

"A long time ago." I answered with a weak smile.

"Good." The other grinned broadly and said in a clogged whisper, "Just don't cry when you lose."

"I won't." I reassured them.

"I'm Joe, by the way." The first one said. "This is Ron."

"I'm Kerstin. Nice to meet you."

"Share-who?" Ron said.

"Kerstin." I pronounced slowly, but then added. "They call me Red."

"I wonder why." Joe said, and they both laughed.

"Are you going to stand there staring, son?" Rod said looking over my head. "…or are you going to join us?"

Will Grandison took a seat between Joe and me, across from Ron. Ron eyed Will and wheezed. "We've an added challenge, young lady. This boy hardly ever looses. Your changes of winning were scarce to begin with, my dear, but I'm afraid now they're non-existent."

My eyes jumped wide open. "You know Will?"

Ron nodded. "You owe me another game of Stratego, Willie?"

"Losing twice isn't enough?" Will said.

"Rookie's luck. We'll see how you fare in Parcheesi."

It was nice to see Will glaring at someone else for a change, but I didn't think it was exactly appropriate for him to glare at a man three or four times his age. However, I do have to say that Ron's wrinkly skin, crooked nose, thinning white eyebrows, and multi-colored teeth added an extra sinister oomph to his own glare to combat Will's. After Joe started laughing at the two of them, slight smiles grew on Will and Ron's faces.

As we played, I talked little and mostly stared at my pieces while Joe, Ron, and Will talked mostly about politics and healthcare. In the middle of their discussion, Ron started coughing…coughing uncontrollably. Mucous oozed out his nose, and…well…something else…seeped out of his mouth. Joe started patting him on the back. While he still coughed, Ron's eyes seemed to plead with me to do something for him, but what could I do? I could play golf and tutor in statistics…nothing of any worth to Ron. Wishing my touch had some sort of healing power, I put my hand on his back and started rubbing while Joe patted. Will stood up to grab a nurse's attention. Finally, a nurse came to calm his coughing down and clean him up.

The game resumed, but I was even quieter than before. I didn't know what to say or where to look. That's when I remembered a ring pop in my pocket. I tried opening it, but the stupid thing wouldn't open.

"Red," Joe said. "You said you wouldn't cry when you lost."

"I'm not crying," I said, but I felt two tears roll down my cheek. I quickly wiped them away, but then a few more came down.

"Red, what's wrong?" Will asked.

I hesitated, but whispered close to his ear and pointed to the ring pop. "The stupid thing won't open."

Will's eyes narrowed. "You probably shouldn't eat it in front of them."

Not in the mood to argue or hit him, I took a deep breath and put the ring pop back in my pocket.

Will whispered in my ear, "They don't expect you to heal or translate them. They just want you to smile, small talk, and play Parcheesi."

_How'd he…Why'd he… _I had a hard time believing the novelty…his words weren't offensive. In fact, they were thoughtful. Yet…his face still featured narrowed eyes, a furrowed brow and a set jaw.

He leaned toward my ear again, but said louder. "You are loosing pretty badly, though."

"She said she wouldn't cry," Joe said.

"I'm not," I said.

"Good. Let's get this game going, but…" Joe split his focus between Will and I. "…no alliances."

"No worries, Joe," Will said. "Red will fend for herself. I was only telling her how badly she's loosing."

"Right, of course you were." Ron smirked.

I couldn't take not knowing any longer. "How do you know each other?"

"Ron's my great-uncle." Will said. "My paternal grandpa's brother."

"Is that what I am to you? No wonder you keep bothering me here." Ron laughed. After completing his turn, he said. "Are you still planning to waste your engineering degree and going to medical school?"

Will shook his head. "Law school."

"Same thing." Ron sighed, "Just what this world needs…another lawyer."

"I thought you were going into business." Joe said.

"I am." Will said.

"So…eventually…you're getting an MBA as well?"

Will nodded.

Ron turned toward me. "A sadistic overachiever, like his grandfather." He winked and asked me. "What do you do when you're not loosing at Parcheesi?"

_Dang…what do I do?_

Will cleared his throat. "She played golf for BYU."

_Yeah, but that's what I did…not what I do now._

"Why didn't you say so?" Ron's eyes light up. "What's your handicap?"

I smiled. "Scratch."

"No kidding." Joe said. "Did you win any tournaments?"

"As a team, yeah, but not personally. I lead a couple of tournaments into the last day."

"Then you choked?" Will said.

I glared at him. "No, somebody would come from behind."

"How'd you get started with golf?" Joe asked.

"It's a family thing. My dad played for Weber years ago. My older brother and sister played for BYU. But then…my mom is a fair weather golfer and my little brother retired his clubs when he was 11." _Yeah…more than they needed to know._

"Who's the best in your family?" Ron asked.

"I am." I smiled. "…but the answer to that question varies…depending on which one of us you ask."

"Have you thought about turning pro?" Joe asked.

"Yeah, but it's not for me. After 14 years of straight golfing, you kind of wonder what else is out there besides golf." I said. "I'm still looking for a job after I graduate. I'm a statistics major."

"Statistics." Ron said. "When you could be golfing?"

I didn't know how to respond to that, but thankfully I didn't need to. Ian, Kyle, and Emily came up to our table and asked us if we were ready to go. While Will was completing his game winning move, he said. "Yes."

After Will and I cleaned up the game, there was an awkward silence that was supposed to be filled with some sort of good-bye.

Ron broke it. "You're going to bother me again before you leave Provo, right?"

"Probably." Will said.

"Bring the young lady with you." Ron smirked. "She lightens your mood."

Will glared at his great-uncle, said "Bye" to Joe, and then left the premises. I'm not sure how wide I was gaping, but Joe and Ron started laughing when they turned towards me once Will was out of sight.

When Ron stopped laughing, he said to me. "He's shrewd and painfully blunt, but he's a good young man. All he needs now is an angel like you."

_Me…an angel? for Will? _"I…uh…well…" I blushed. "We're not exactly on good terms. I wouldn't even call us friends."

"Ron," Joe laughed. "Don't jump the gun on them. They don't even see it themselves."

"Uh…" _There's nothing between Will and me except glares, Cooper, and red hair._ "I should get going. It's nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you, too." Ron smiled. "Miss Kerstin."

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The rest of the week slid by casually—the highlights being the ice cream that showed up in our freezer on Wednesday and tutoring Cooper McCoy.

I cornered Emily in the kitchen on Wednesday. "Emily, do you have something to tell me?"

"What?" She said…all too innocently.

"There's ice cream in the freezer. That can mean only one of three things. Someone's had an emotional brake down, it's that time of the month, or someone's been kissed. Everyone in this apartment is very vocal during their emotional brake downs. I'm the only one PMSing this time of the month. For reasons against all logic, I follow the three of you by a week. Therefore, evidence shows that someone's been kissed." I fold my arms. "Give me the gory details."

"It… He… Well…" Emily blushed.

"Follow Fraulein Maria's example, and start at the very beginning."

"Well…"

"Emily, you've never hesitated before."

"It's not just a high school crush."

"You're the only person I know that have kissed all of her high school crushes. How hard can it be?"

"Well, this one seems more…private." Emily rubbed her middle finger and thumb together in her left hand. "…as if the kiss should only be talked about between Kyle and me."

"How does it rank?"

"Nothing compares." She said. I didn't think I'd ever seen Emily so swoonish.

"Can you tell me where it happened?"

She sighed and pointed to the front door.

"Inside or Out?" I asked.

"Inside."

"When he walked you home from campus yesterday?"

"Uh-huh."

"You have it bad, Emily."

"Uh-huh."

"I expect a ring on your finger by finals." I said, but she couldn't hear me over her sighs.

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Cooper was asleep at a table in the library when I got there Friday morning. I nudged his shoulder.

"Cooper, time for stats."

He rubbed his eyes and stretched. "Morning, Kerstin."

"Late night?"

"All nighter. I've a report due at 10."

I shook my head. "I'm glad I haven't done one of those in a while. I'm useless for days."

Cooper shrugged. "It's been a while for me, too. I'll buy candy to get me through the rest of my classes, and than I'll crash." After he asked me a few stat questions, he asked, "Are you doing anything tonight?"

I blinked at him a couple of times.

He continued with his dimpled smile. "One of my roommates' girlfriend found this Lepricon/St. Patrick's Day movie with Sean Connery in it. I've no idea if it's any good, but hey…it's Sean Connery. Would you like to come over? Granted I get some sleep this afternoon, I might stay awake."

_How could I say no to that smile? But I have no choice._ "I can't. My FHE group is throwing a dance tonight, and I'm the mom. But you could come if you wanted. I'm not exactly sure how many people will be there. It's at a house on 2230 N in Provo."

"At Ian Laird's place?" His smile faltered a touch.

"Yeah."

"I won't be much of a partier. I might fall a sleep in the middle of a slow dance. I don't think you could hold me up."

"238 lbs… you're right. I couldn't."

"I'll take a rain check."

After a few more stat related questions, I asked. "How do you know Will? Why did he…" I didn't know how to finish.

Cooper said. "He was the best companion I had on the mission. We hung out a lot after we got back, but we got in a fight last summer."

"A fight?"

"Over a girl." He added.

"Over a girl?" _Would that stimulate at least eight months of aggression?_

He looked down at his stat homework. "Yeah."

"Why's he still mad?"

"Oh, you noticed that?" He rolled his eyes.

"Who didn't?" I pictured Will's death glare.

"It was a pretty big fight."

I blinked and asked, "A fist fight?"

He said, "Yeah," as if there was more to it than that.

I tried to picture Will punching Cooper. Although Will had aggression, he didn't exactly seem like the type to loose control of himself. However, I remembered how all of his muscles clinched at the sight of Cooper and how he grabbed my arm. I asked, "How did it end up?"

"I don't remember who or how many it took to get him off of me, but I remember a couple my friends icing my face afterwards. He broke my jaw."

"What? You're jaw?" My mouth dropped, and I sat stunned silent for a moment. "They had to get him off you? I would have thought…" I blushed. I should have been wondering why someone didn't hold Will back in the first place, but my mind was comparing the participants. Cooper had a bulkier build than Will. I thought that Cooper would have had the upper hand.

Cooper shook his head. "Will knows how to carry himself in a fight."

"Oh." I said. "I'm sorry."

He shrugged. "It was a while ago."

"But, apparently, still fresh in his mind."

"Apparently," he agreed.

"Who was the girl?"

"Her name was Amber Tomlinson. She's graduated now from BYU, and I believe she's engaged."

"So, neither of you won her than." I said before thinking that I was only stating the obvious.

He nodded and took a drink from his water bottle.

I asked randomly, "What color hair did she have?"

He started coughing and cleared his throat, "Why do you ask?"

"Just curious." I shrugged.

"Her hair wasn't much different from yours. Maybe…more auburn."

"And she was gorgeous, of course." _Could you imagine Will or Cooper with anyone looking less than a goddess?_

Cooper smirked. "Of course."

"Huh. I'm sorry," I said.

He smiled at me.

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"I can't picture Will fighting." Emily said as we were getting ready for the dance. "He doesn't seem the type to lose his cool like that."

"Are we taking about the same Will here…Will Grandison?" I said in frustration. "You didn't see him grab my arm at the party last week." I grabbed my own arm and hissed with the evilest voice I could muster, "How do you know him?"

"True." Emily laughed, "…but if Ian knows about it and doesn't hold it against Will, then the whole thing can't be that big of a deal."

"Emily! Will and Cooper had a fist fight over a girl. Will started it. He broke Cooper's jaw and had to be pried off a 238lbs fullback. I don't know where Ian fits in to all this, but last week, Will looked at Cooper and me as if we were evil aliens sent to destroy the cosmos."

"Okay…okay…that was random…but, Red, you haven't heard his side of the story."

"Will? He wouldn't tell me. He didn't even tell me when I asked him about it after Church last week."

"What did he say?"

I looked down. "Nothing."

She crossed her arms.

"He could've, though." I said. "…but then Ian yelled, 'Will, I'm starving! Let's go!' And then he glared at me for a bit before he left without a word."

Emily shook her head.

"What?" I said.

"Why are you so set against Will?"

"I'm not against him." I scoffed. "It's just…why does he glare at me…why did he give me such a hard time about Zach…why did he switch ties with him last week…why does he always find fault with me…why is he such a…"

"Whoa! Breath, Red! I understand, but you still need to hear his side of the story before jumping to conclusions about it."

"Okay, Mother."

"Red," Emily laughed and rolled her eyes. "You remember what a self-absorbed prick we thought Ian was until we got to know him. And now…you ask him to crack your back for you all the time. If that isn't a wake up call to repent and stop judging, I don't know what is." She shook her head. "How do we know that Will didn't have a good reason to fight?"

I didn't say anything.

"Do you have the guts to ask him?" She asked.

I wished that I could sigh inaudibly, but Emily heard it.

She said. "Yeah, Will's not really the most approachable person ever."

"You think?" I scuffed.

After a few minutes to let me cool off, Emily asked. "Is Cooper coming tonight?"

"No. I'd like you to meet him, though. He's…" I sighed. "He's something else."

"Apparently!" Emily smirked, "I don't think anyone's taken your breath away since Jared McClean."

"This time the boy actually knows my name, and he…" I blushed.

"He…what?"

"He told me that I looked hot last week at the party."

"Ooooo!" Emily raised an eyebrow and laughed. "Was that the first time a guy's told you that?"

"I wasn't a prom queen and Miss New-Boyfriend-Every-Other-Week in my high school like somebody else I know." Like the mature adult I am, I stuck my tongue out at her.

She rolled her eyes.

"And you have a special someone now that hasn't taken his eyes off you for almost a month." I said.

"Red," She hesitated. "I…really like him. I know we've made fun of people that get engaged fast, but…if he asks, I…"

"Hey," I stopped her and smiled. "It's fine."

"You think I'm a hypocrite."

I shrugged. "No. It's one of those things that people make fun of until and even after it happens to themselves. Besides…when you know, you know, right?"

She smiled and blushed.

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Our mouths dropped open the moment Emily, Katie, Jenna, and I walked in to "the house." Everything was cleared. The recliners and the love sack had all disappeared, and Kyle was holding a ladder in the middle of the floor while Ian was putting up a disco ball.

"Wow!" Katie cried. "Where'd you fine it?"

"Sam, my bro number 4, found it at D.I. about five years ago. Who knew?" replied Ian. "Sweet, huh."

While my roommates and I set up a green snack table in the kitchen, apartment #14 was already there blowing up green balloons and taping them among the video games, VHS's, and DVDs, and the twins were setting up folding chairs around the room. I'd never seen the place seem so empty and huge, but that didn't last too long. About an hour later the media room, kitchen and foyer were packed with people. I recognized a lot of people from our ward, but everyone else…friends of a friend of a friend.

I didn't dance at first. I made sure that people didn't trash the snack table. I was cleaning up diet caffeine-free coke when Emily rushed toward me, "Isn't hell supposed to be a condition and not a place?"

"As far as I understand it, yes…why?" I asked.

"Out of all the boys that I dated in high school five of them are here." Emily caught breath, but spoke quickly, "and all of them are talking to Kyle right now. I've never been so…"

"What!"

"Yeah, they're talking about high school." She whispered. "I had to leave."

"What are they saying?" She didn't answer, so I continued trying to ease her distress. "That you had the most sought after lips in high school and freshman year of college."

"No!" She cried. "I guess it's not so bad as that. They're talking about the musicals and plays I did with some of them, seminary, and group dates we did, but still…why are they all here? Of all my break ups, those were the worst."

I paused before asking, "Wouldn't Will know them?"

She bolted her head upright. "Yes, he would, but he was older and didn't hang out with us much. Though, he'd be the only one that would have invited them. I didn't. Come with me."

She dragged me out of the kitchen to the corner of the media room that turned into a Henderson YSA meeting. I recognized quite a few of the girls and some of the guys as Emily's home friends whom she still hung out with. I didn't recognize the rest of the guys who must have been her ex-boyfriends who were gathered around Kyle and Will (with a few girls mixed in the circle). When Emily reached Kyle's side, Kyle put an arm around her waist causing one guy to choke on his drink, another to raise an eyebrow and gape, and another to untie and retie his shoe laces. _I guess some of them never got over her. Interesting._

_His eyes…man, his stupid, amazing eyes_..._why can't he look somewhere else?_ To my annoyance, every time I'd look around or over a shoulder on a dance partner I'd see Will (surprise…surprise) staring at me, and while I took a break from dancing for a few songs and leaned against a bookshelf of VHS's, Will's condescending gaze never left my face. When I'd had enough, I abruptly stomped toward him and demanded, "Why are you staring at me?"

He smirked. "What makes you think I was staring at you?" He gazed back to where I was leaning. I turned around and saw a beautiful brunette, Jill Garnet from our ward, standing not too far from where I was. She sent a flirtatious smile our way (obviously, not intended for me). I grunted in half-embarrassment…half-frustration and tried to retreat toward the kitchen (_Maybe there's Mountain Dew left for me…caffeine free of course._), but an all too familiar grip seized my arm.

"Hey," I said pointing to his hand. "That's three times you've grabbed my arm like that."

Will shrugged and let go. "While you're here, you're going to dance with me."

"Oh, am I?" _For the one millionth time, who does he think he is?_ But...then again...I did walk up to him at the beginning of a slow song. _Brilliant, Kerstin._

He smirked again. "I bet you've never turned down a dance before."

Of course, I hadn't. I was looking at the only person I had ever known to turn down a dance. "I could start following your example." I crossed my arms.

"Suit yourself." He said and walked towards Jill Garnet.

"Wait!" I cried, and he stopped abruptly. I couldn't control my blush when I realized that I had just grabbed his arm. "It'd be rude of me to say no to you and then dance with other people."

"True."

"And I still want to dance."

"Just not with me." He said.

He grabbed my right hand in his left and put the other in the middle of my back as I rested my left hand on his shoulder. I wasn't surprised by the stiffness of his manner when dancing; it suited his character, but I still had a hard time meeting his gaze. When I did, we had another staring contest. _Do normal people stare at someone inches away from them? _I blinked first this time. I couldn't get over how hardnosed and stern he appeared and…yet…his dark eyes, his strong jaw and defined cheekbones all made me wonder how much more amazing he'd look if he smiled…if he ever really smiled.

"Well." I said trying to stop myself from staring as openly at him as he stared at me. "Dancing would be a good time to figure you out."

"Figure me out?" He said. "What would you like to know?"

I knew that it wouldn't be wise to start questioning first about Cooper, but I still started my questioning too bluntly with "Why are Ian and Kyle friends with you?" I half expected his countenance to turn menacing, but he maintained a pokerfaced expression. Well…his eyebrows turned in a little.

"Why don't you ask them?" He said.

"Maybe, I will." I took a moment to focus on my breathing...to keep my frustration in check, and then I asked the first thing that came to my head. "What's your favorite color?" _That was lame._

A corner of his mouth raised. "Blue. Do you think Ian and Kyle would still be my friends if I liked green?"

"Why did you switch ties with Zach last week?"

He let out a short laugh and looked away from me for a second. "He offered, and I'd never worn a plaid tie." His gaze on me intensified as he added, "I think he regretted his choice of tie that day."

"No one was making fun of him for wearing it."

"That doesn't mean a change wouldn't help his confidence."

_True. Huh. _I swallowed before I demanded…for the second time that night, "Why do you stare at me?"

All expression wiped off his face. _He's good at that._

"Are you going to answer?" I asked.

"I've said it before…what makes you think I'm staring at you?" He said.

I stomped my foot. _Why doesn't he answer?_

"Anymore questions?" He asked.

"You never talk unless provoked or nagged. You never let anyone outside of 'the house' get to know you. You're completely unapproachable except when you're teaching. I've never seen you smile—really smile." I paused hoping he'd comment, but I should have known better. I aimlessly continued, "You don't… I don't…" …_understand why you're so conceited, stuck up, and such a jerk. Yeah…I probably shouldn't say that._

"Are you going to finish that thought?"

My checks flushed. "No." I waited in vain for him to say something, but…again…what did I expect? "Say something." I pleaded.

"I'm waiting for the question." He said.

_Cheese Me A River! Gah! What a j…_

Will's smile ceased my thoughts. It wasn't only a smile. It was a full blown eye-twinkling smile. My eyes shot wide in an instant, but my mouth gradually morphed from a thin line to a full drooling gape (I don't think anything came out…I hope, anyway). As I willed myself to start breathing again, his furrowed brow and a cruel glint in his eyes wiped his smile away. He asked, "Are you alright?"

"Um…fine?" I'd just witness Will Grandison smile for two seconds. Would you have been okay? Probably, but I sure as heck didn't know where the smile came from or why it disappeared so fast. However, I concluded that he was just smiling (genuinely for the first time in my sight) because I was frustrated. _Jerk!_

At my reply/question, his sternness and stiffness amplified 100 percent. He asked slowly. "Are you fine or not?"

"Fine!" I said too loudly. "I'm fine."

His expression eased back to pokerfaced. The slow song finally ended, but neither of us moved out of middle of the room. We stood face to face while people were "getting jiggy with it" in a PG sort of way all around us. He folded his arms and held my gaze as if waiting for me to make the next move.

_I might as well do it now. _I cleared my throat. "What happened between you and Cooper?"

He didn't cringe, flinch, or throw another punch. In fact, he had been expecting the question…probably since he never got a chance to answer the last time I asked it, and he probably wondered why it took me so long to bring it up again. However, if he really was expecting me to ask about Cooper again, he failed to prepare an answer…or maybe he only prepared himself not to blow up in my face when I asked. Regardless, he answered, "It's none of your business."

"Cooper told me what happened." I watched his jaw tighten. "Can't you tell me your side of it?"

"It's none of your business." He repeated.

"Why'd you fight?" I persisted.

He shook his head.

I took a deep breath and counted to ten before asking. "Why are you still mad at him? It was last summer." I waited for a response. None came. "I invited him to come tonight."

"He wouldn't dare enter that door knowing I was here." Will clenched his fists.

"Why can't you forgive him?"

"This isn't about forgiveness."

"Oh, really? Tell me what it is then."

"No."

The conversation was going nowhere. I spun around and stormed away from him, but his annoying grip caught my arm again.

"Watch your back with McCoy." He said in my ear.

"Spoken like someone who's truly forgiven, and might I remind you that you were the one pried off of him in the fight." I said.

Then, he took his turn to storm away from me.

I found refuge in the kitchen…checking up on the snack table. Sure enough, all that remained on the table were empty bowls and plates with a chip or a half of a cookie here and there. While washing the bowls and plates in the sink, I noticed a huge presence on my left drying the dishes.

"Cinderella didn't start work again until midnight if I'm not mistaken." Ian said.

"Cinderella didn't have a burly man helping her either. The girl and I have little in common."

"True." A smile grew on his face as he put a couple bowls away in a cupboard. "I saw you dancing with Will. Did he finally say, 'yes,' to a dance?"

"He asked me." I said, but corrected myself. "No, excuse me. Let me rephrase. He told me to dance with him."

Ian paused with his drying while he let out a burst of laughter. "Really? Miracles never have ceased, have they."

"What do you mean?"

"The Book of Mormon's true." Ian continued to chuckle.

_What does that have to do with me dancing with Will? _After his laughter died down, I dared myself to ask him a question. "Ian?"

"Yeah?"

I hesitated, but I'd already started. "Why does Will stare at me?"

Ian started laughing louder than he was a second ago.

"What?" I asked.

He shook his head.

"Well, I asked him about it." I added.

Ian dropped the bowl that he was drying (luckily, it was plastic), and he stayed bent over—making it hard to tell if he was coughing up a lung or laughing. He regained some composure, and upon seeing my serious features, he apologized and asked, "What he'd say?"

"He never really answered." I furrowed my brow and deepened my voice to say, "What makes you think I'm staring at you?"

While Ian's boisterous laughter challenged the volume of the dance music, I turned to hide my blush and to wash the last few platters. I made a mental note never to ask Ian questions about Will again. We continued our work in silence, but after several seconds, I felt a kick in the rear.

"What was that?" I cried.

"Nothing." Ian said.

I felt the kick again. "Ian!" I whined. "Stop!"

He snickered and asked, "What'd I do?"

Out of the corner of my eye, I caught him flicking back his heel…kicking my rear. I tried doing it back to him, but I missed. He was too tall. _Cheese!_ I tried again, but with a jump. _Cheese! I missed, again!_ He did it to me, again. As I tried to kick him again and again (while jumping), I cried, "I…can't…reach…you! No Fair!"

He collapsed on the kitchen floor in laughter. Still peeved, I whipped him in the arm with a dish towel.

"Hey!" He cried while standing up, and he had no idea how vulnerable he was. I took the opportunity and whipped him with the towel in his rear.

"Haha!" I exclaimed, but I forgot that Ian was fast for a huge, white guy. He had the sink sprayer in his hands before I could duck or shield myself. Well…I got wet and quickly gave Ian another whip in the rear before we noticed the audience we'd attracted. In the forefront stood Will, arms folded, feet standing shoulder-width apart and square-jaw set.

"What?" I asked ready to whip him as well.

"Red." Ian laughed and shook his head.

The crowd averted their eyes and dispersed, but Will walked toward me and started taking off his polo shirt.

I backed away from him as he drew nearer toward me. "What's he doing?" I asked Ian.

"Will, what's up?" Ian asked.

When Will didn't say anything, Ian looked at me, but quickly moved his eyes else where. I looked down at myself and gasped. _The day I choose not to wear a tank top underneath my shirt… _As I folded my arms across my chest and turned my back to Ian, Will and the rest of the world, a shirt went over my head and covered me. I shot my arms through the sleeves, turned back around, and found myself face to face with Will again. We stared at each other for a few seconds…him in an old white Far-side T-shirt with a bunch of smoking dinosaurs on it over the caption "No wonder they're extinct"…and me in his polo that he had just taken off…to put on me. _Huh._ I blushed and said, "Thank you."

Will nodded slightly, and we both took a step away from each other when Ian cleared his throat.

"Red, I'm…um…yeah…that won't happen again." Ian said.

I responded with a weak smile and dug my hand into my pocket to get out my keys. "I should go," I said while walking toward the kitchen screen door, but stopped and turned around. _What about my roommates?_

"We'll take them home," Will said.

"What?" _Did I say that out loud?_

"Your roommates," he said as he opened the screen door for me. "Either Ian or I'll take them home."

"Thanks," I said and quickly left.


	12. Chapter 11

Author's note: I don't know who all uses the term VL, but it means "virgin lips" or in other words "never been kissed." In chapter two, you found out that Red was half Swedish. I haven't done anything with it until this chapter. I think I should have brought it up some other times as well, but I didn't think about it. As for the slow update, I wish I wasn't as slow at the writing process as I am, but I love doing it. Bare with me, though. I'm determined to finish this story. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

Chapter 11

It was the Tuesday after the dance, and I was studying at the kitchen table in our apartment when I heard someone cry, "Red!"

"What?"

"Did you not hear me ask you a question?" Emily said with her hands on her hips.

Frankly, I didn't even notice her come home from campus, but she didn't need to know that. I figured giving her a blank look would suffice in answering her question. A part of me expected Emily to chew me out for ignoring her, but she didn't. Her eyes welled up with tears, and she ran off.

_What was that?_ After I stared blankly at the wall for few moments, I got up and found Emily staring at her reflection in the bathroom mirror. A couple tears dripped down her cheek.

"Em, what's wrong?" I said.

She weakly smiled, "Oh, it's probably nothing, but …did Kyle call?"

"Here?" I cleared my throat. "The apartment?"

She nodded.

"Doesn't he usually call your cell?" I asked.

She pulled out her cell phone and looked at it. "Well, yeah...usually, but…did he call here?"

"No."

She looked down at her phone again.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"Kyle didn't meet me in the Tanner building for lunch today…or yesterday. He didn't even walk me home. I waited for him, but…" Fresh tears started streaming down her face. "I've called him twice since church on Sunday, but he hasn't returned them."

I leaned against the bathroom doorframe. _This isn't good._

"Red," she continued. "I love him, and…I thought he…at least liked me."

All I did was stare at her.

"Why is he avoiding me? But…really…how do I know he is avoiding me?" Her eyes pleaded for answers. "Did I do something wrong? Was it something I said? Why doesn't he return my calls? Should I call him again? What should I do?"

I wished with all my heart that I could know what to say, but the only person I knew with enough boy experience to answer those questions was…in fact…Emily. She needed more fingers and toes than just her own digits to count the number of her boyfriends. "Hasn't something like this happened to you before?"

She shook her head. "This is the guy that I want to spend all eternity with."

_Huh._

She didn't sing in the shower that next morning as she usually did. She didn't even smile or say, "bye," when she left for the day. I have no idea how many times Emily looked longingly at her cell phone or how many moments she spent wondering where she went wrong with Kyle, but I knew that's what she would be doing that day.

I wasn't having a great day either. I'd be walking to class, strolling through the WILK or going to the restroom in the Talmage building…when a random girl from my ward, who I had no idea even passed me on campus…let alone knew my name or…nickname…as it were, would ask me, "What's up with you and Ian?" For the first 2 million times (alright…it was really just 5, but…still), I responded, "We're just friends," but when Zach Newman asked me, I lost it. I screamed, "Why can't you see we're just friends?" in the middle of the BYU bookstore. Then, I realized the ambiguity of what I just screamed, who I was screaming at, and that I probably should apologize profusely. Poor Zach.

That night, after I got home from working on a group project at the Talmage building, I found Katie and Jenna watching TV and giggling.

"Hey," I said.

Their giggles ceased abruptly. They glanced at each other, exchanged smirks, and muted the TV.

Jenna crossed her arms and asked, "What's up with you and Ian?"

I groaned, "Can't I have some peace?"

Katie rephrased. "Are you two together?"

Not trusting myself to say anything rational yet, I took a couple deep breaths. Then, I said. "No, we're just friends."

"Sure…whatever," Jenna said.

"Ian's always flirting with you," Katie said. "…like at the dance when he got you all wet, on Saturday at the dollar theater you two sat together, and he sat next to you at church."

Jenna added, "And last night at FHE you two fought and made up like an old married couple."

"Yeah…and every time we hang out he picks you up and squeezes." Kate said.

"Those things don't mean anything," I said.

"Whatever," Katie smiled. "I think you'll owe us ice cream by General Conference."

"No! Grow up," I cried. "A girl and a guy can just be friends."

"Red, I've always thought that the guy, who dares to coax out the flirt inside you, will steal your VL status." Jenna laughed. "I say Moose Tracks by this weekend."

_Gah! _I marched to my bedroom, threw down my bag, and collapsed on my bed. After I stared at the ceiling for a while, I heard a sob and looked for the source. Emily was prostrate on top of her bed.

"Emily?" I said. "What's wrong?"

No reply.

"What happened?" I said.

Again…no reply, but she muffled another cry.

I got up and sat on her bed. I reached my hand out to touch her, but hesitated. When it came to being around people, I loved my space. If you want to see me ticked, invade my personal bubble without my permission. Yet…I remembered how good it felt when she rubbed my back when I cried about missing a three inch putt on the 18th hole, loosing my spot on the travel team sophomore year. Just last semester, she let me cry on her shoulder when I found out that Jared McClean, my crush of that semester, didn't know who the heck I was after two months of trying for him, and I thought of a million other times in between that she'd been there for me. _Had I ever done anything for her?_ I started rubbing her back.

"Did Kyle talk to you today?" I asked.

She nodded.

"What did he say?"

She lifted her head to turn it toward me. "I ran into him in between classes. He wasn't going to talk, but I asked him what was up." She bit her lower lip and took a deep breath. "He wants us to take a break. He wants to date other people. He doesn't think we're right for each other."

I gasped, "He didn't."

"He did," she said before burying her head in her pillow.

"What a…" I started.

"Don't you dare say anything about him," she cried. "I'm sure he has his reasons."

"What? He didn't tell you?"

"No, but that doesn't mean you should say anything bad about him."

I bit my tongue. I wanted to hate him. I wanted to curse his name and his posterity, but Emily was right. Christ did say to love our neighbors. He even said to love our enemies, and on top of that, He said, "If you love me, keep my commandments." So…if I didn't want to shoot myself in the foot, I needed to think nicer thoughts about Kyle. Besides…people fall in and out of love all the time. Maybe he didn't like Emily as much as she liked him and freaked when he realized she loved him, but…really…that didn't make sense. From the things he did for her, the stuff he said to her, and the way he looked at her, I would have sworn that he loved her…or at least liked her enough not to drop her like he did. I sighed. "Did he say anything else?"

"No. He had to get to class."

That was the first night she cried herself to sleep.

* * *

Cooper didn't show up for tutoring on Friday. I didn't mind too much because I had a test that day, and while I reviewed the material, I realized I forgot to study an entire section of the notes and used classes that day as extra study time. Although a normal person would have skipped the classes, I figured I'd hit two birds with one stone. My professors were used to me not paying attention, but, ironically, they were annoyed that I was studying for another class during their lectures. Honestly though, I think I got just as much out of their lectures as I normally did.

Luckily, I ran into some classmates cramming for the test. We quizzed each other until we could quote our notes word for word. When one of them started singing our nastier proofs to the tune of nursery rhymes, I slammed my book shut. _Enough is enough!_

"You going to take it…now?" a girl asked.

"Yeah," I sighed.

All the singing, chanting, and quizzing stopped. Everyone stared at me as if I was a pig headed for the slaughter.

"Good luck," she said.

"We're all going to need it," I said.

"Yeah," a guy said. "May the force be with you."

"Thanks," I smiled weakly. "You too."

The guy hummed the Darth Vader's theme as I left my classmates. From the Talmage, it was a long walk south to the testing center.

The nursery rhymes were stuck in my head, but as soon as the testing center came into view all thought went blank.

In upper level classes, one learns to be grateful for in-class tests because the professors create the tests knowing that their students only have the duration of the class period to complete it. It's a nice atmosphere as well…sitting in a familiar seat, next to familiar people who you've had enough classes with to know who taps their pencil to beat of "Abide with Me; Tis Eventide" and who rubs their nose every twenty seconds.

But…in the testing center…

Picture a room…a massive hall…vaulted ceilings…filled with 300 desks in rows, columns, and along the walls…85 percent full of students taking tests ranging from freshman level English to graduate level chemistry classes. You hear echoes of pens scratching and pencils circling in bubbles. You hear people coughing, sniffing and shifting papers. Face clocks dot the walls. Windows frame treetops, clouds, and sky…a gentle reminder that no matter what happens while you're filling in bubbles, life still goes on outside the testing center. As you walk along and down rows of occupied desks in search of a vacant one, you see mouths silently muttering…a question, a written response, or a prayer.

As I opened the door to enter the testing center, I bumped into Kyle. We stared at each other…motionless and silent. I struggled keeping my thoughts nice, but prevailed with…_he's a normal guy who's suffers from tactlessness. It's unfortunate that our tactlessness affects other people._

"Hey," I said at last.

He cleared his throat, "Hey...um…"

"Yeah?" I said.

"Well…uh," he said while playing with the top button of his shirt. "How's Emily?"

"Um…" _Crying her eyes out every night over you, jerk…I mean…um…brother in the gospel._ "…not herself."

"Oh." He gazed at my feet for a moment. I thought he opened his mouth to say something else, but I didn't know for sure. He did, however, walk away from me, and after he took twenty or so steps (yes…I was staring at him…and counting), he turned and said, "Tell her I…"

"Why don't you tell her?" I interrupted.

He sighed and shook his head.

_Um…Shoot. I probably should have let him finish._

As he strolled away, he said, "Good luck on your test."

_At least he asked about her. That is a good sign, isn't it?_

Inside the testing center, I waited 30 minutes in line to pick up my test. When I finally got it and entered the massive hall, I walked to the far west side of the room, and as I chose what desk to sit at, I made sure that the sun wouldn't glare on the desk in the late afternoon. I squeezed down a row trying to avoid hitting elbows and tripping over people's backpacks and bags. When I sat down, I thumbed through the test—38 pages of tables for reference and 17 pages of white paper with a single lined question, equation or item to prove written at the top of each page.

My testing strategy was very similar to taking a handful of spaghetti and throwing it against a wall to see how much would stick…especially when I had no clue how to answer a question. I wrote down everything I knew that somehow related to the question, and I hoped that my professors or TAs would get two cents out of all the "hooptedoodle" I wrote and would take a couple of mild pain killers before grading it. My motto: _When in doubt, go for partial credit._

After spending about two hours answering most of the questions, I took a forty minute nap and then cleaned up the small puddle of drool on the desk. After that, I spent another hour or so finishing the rest of the test and read over my answers. It's amazing what solutions you come up with after taking a nap.

After I turned in my test, I headed back downstairs toward the "results screen" for the scan-tron tests (which…obviously… mine was not) and started out the door.

"Kerstin?"

I spun around. "Hey, Cooper." _Looking good as ever._

"I saw you passed out in the testing center." He smirked.

_Great. I bet you saw the drool puddle, too._ "Yeah…um…my brain needed a break. How did your test go?"

"See that 'Congratulations' flashing." His grin broadened as he pointed to a "Congratulations" flashing next to a Student ID number…meaning that person got an A on his or her test. "That's me."

"Wow. I can't remember the last time I got one of those. What test was it?"

"The stat 221 exam." He lifted a hand for a high five.

I gave him one. "That's awesome."

"Thanks to you."

I giggled nervously.

"Hey," he said. "Some buddies and I are meeting up to play Ultimate tomorrow afternoon. You want to come?"

"Yeah, sounds fun."

"I could pick you up."

"S-sure," I said.

"Cool," he said. "I'll call you tonight."

After he left, I started breathing normally again. I ran to the library, ran down three flights of stairs, and ran into the lower-level accounting class lab/study/get help/um…yeah room.

"Emily," I cried. "He asked me out."

All the students with earphones on, sitting at the lab computers, listening to the accounting lectures stared at me…most giggled.

_Thoughtful entrance, Kerstin._

"Um…good, Red," Emily said. "Who?"

I whispered, "Cooper."

"Oh…I thought it'd be Ian," she smiled.

"What?" I cried. "Why would you…"

"Red, wait one minute," she said. "I'm helping someone."

_Well, Em, my bubble's definitely burst._

After she finished answering a girl's questions, I asked, "Why would you think that I'd be that excited if Ian asked me out?"

"Red," she sighed. "Quite a few people have been asking me 'what's up between you and Ian?'"

"What? You, too? What did you say?"

"To ask you about it."

"Why didn't you tell them? You know the answer, Emily," I said. "We are just friends."

"Um…Red," she said. "It isn't so obvious for me. I've never seen you flirt like you have with Ian."

"We don't flirt," I cried…which grabbed the attention and the giggles of the room's occupants again.

Emily lowered her voice. "On Monday, you two fought for ten minutes about the best way to get to Wal-mart, and then when he conceded and apologized for disagreeing, you two hugged and kissed cheeks."

"We were playing…not flirting."

"What about at the dance on Saturday? How'd you get wet?"

"He sprayed me with the sink sprayer."

She folded her arms.

"He only did it because I whipped him in the rear with a towel," I said.

She raised an eyebrow.

"I whipped him because he was kicking me in the rear with his heal."

She cleared her throat. "Red, that is flirting."

"No," I said. "We were just messing around."

Emily opened her mouth (I'm sure) to contradict me, again, but a guy on one of the back computers raised his hand. As the guy was asking questions, I could tell he had the hots for Emily. _Poor guy. As long as Kyle's still breathing, she'll never think twice about him. _

When she was done helping him, she said, "Have you and Ian talked about this?"

"About what?"

"Red," she shook her head. "Girls are crossing Ian off their ward directories as taken."

"What?"

"Do you know what Ian thinks about you?"

I swallowed. Being with Ian was like being with one of my brothers again. I assumed that he felt the same about me. On the other hand…he was a male…who wasn't related to me…who cracked my back whenever I ask him. My cheeks flushed as I remembered a young women's leader telling us to be wary of guys who like to hug. _Come on, Kerstin. You can trust Ian. He's your friend, but…maybe you should figure out what's up with…_

"So," Emily said breaking my train of thought. "Cooper's taking you on a date."

"Yeah…well…I think so. He's taking me to play Ultimate with his friends tomorrow," I said. "You'd consider that a date, right?"

"Is he giving you a ride?"

I nodded.

"Then yes, my dear reformed hermit, it's a date," she smiled, but I saw the formation of tears in her eyes.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

She shrugged.

I was tempted to tell her about running into Kyle, but decided to keep the incident to myself and hoped…oh did I hope…that Kyle would explain things to her…whatever he was about to say to me. I gave her a quick hug before I left, though.

* * *

Once Cooper and I got to Rock Canyon Park and started walking toward a large group of beautiful people, feelings of intimidation and inadequacy overwhelmed me. I often felt that way around beautiful people. It reminded me of how I felt entering that party a couple weeks ago with Ian and Brit-n-Tiff, and I started wishing that Ian and Brit-n-Tiff were with me again. I recognized a lot of people there from the Student Athlete Building, and I'd even tutored some of them. I recognized other people as couples that were with Will and Ian at the dollar theater a while back, and I hoped they didn't remember me as the girl who laughs when people are attaching each other with machetes.

After I looked though the crowd of people again, my heart sang the Hallelujah Chorus. Ian and Brit-n-Tiff were there. In my excitement (and forgetting momentarily about Cooper), I ran toward them.

"Ian!" I cried.

"Red," he smiled. "I didn't know you were coming."

He opened up his arms, I jumped up in them, and he cracked my back. _Ah, heaven. Ooo, wait a minute._ I forgot that I was limiting the back cracking for the time being.

"Cute yoga pants," Britney said.

"Thanks," I said.

"Are you wearing makeup more than two times a week now?" Tiffany asked.

"Yeah," I confessed.

"I knew you'd see the light." She gave me a hug.

_Did I see tears in her eyes?_

"Ian," a random guy said. "Who's your redhead?"

"She's with me." Cooper said. He walked up next to me and turned me to face the guy.

I wasn't paying attention as Cooper introduced me to that guy. Ian's features had change from mirth to apprehensiveness…as if we were at that party a couple weeks ago all over again. Panic seized me. I looked for Will Grandison, but thank goodness he wasn't there.

Ian, Britney, Cooper and I ended up on the same team (Tiffany pouted). It was fun overall, but I was surprised by the manner Ian interacted with Cooper knowing that Will and Cooper were a little shy of mortal enemies (at least on Will's side). Ian and Cooper joked, laughed, and played Ultimate together as if they'd been hanging out for years, but between points…when I'd be with Cooper, Ian's forehead would wrinkle and his mouth would go thin…not in anger, but uneasiness. Who knows why? Cooper and I would be shooting the breeze or celebrating if our team had scored (high fives or a side hug if either of us had anything to do with the point…nothing big).

My team was quick to learn that I couldn't throw a Frisbee to save my life, but…ironically…I could catch it. I became the designated receiver in the end zone (or whatever they call it in Ultimate). As long as the Frisbee was thrown to a 5 yard radius around me, some how I'd catch it…even if I was being covered by the other team. Who knows…I might have gotten the skill from having brothers…we didn't just golf all the time.

Well…our team won. After I said bye to Ian and Brit-n-Tiff, Cooper drove me home. He opened the car door for me, but after I stepped out of the car, he still had one hand on the car door and the other on the car…pinning me in. His eyes traveled from my shoes to my eyes. Then he smiled as he shook his head.

"Gah, you're hot," he said.

My knees started quivering, but I couldn't help giggling at the outburst. "Gee, that was eloquent."

He looked away from me while he laughed, but when his eyes returned to my face, his hand that used to be on the car door…um…wasn't there anymore. His fingers were curved around my neck and in my hair, and his thumb was stoking the apple of my check. As he leaned in and pulled me towards him, he said, "Would you rather me tell you that your eyes are mesmerizing? It's true, but…honestly…who says that? Most guys prefer actions over words."

_Ho. Gee. Cow._ I tried swallowing, but that didn't work. I tried thinking rationally, but that didn't work either. Looking back, I can't even imagine to what shade of red my cheeks were. All I remember is…they were burning. _He's closing his eyes. His face is getting closer. This is freaking me out. What the heck do I do?_

"McCoy!"

We both jumped and turned to find Will Grandison, Zach Newman, and Zach's roommate, Cory what's-his-face, staring at us. While the latter two's expressions comprised of being everything from embarrassed and perplexed to scandalized and upset, the former was trying to kill us with his gaze.

_Some things shouldn't be done in a parking lot._

I quickly separated myself from Cooper as Will started speaking. Will didn't yell, but his tone wasn't pleasant. Why am I not telling you what he said? It was all in Swedish. I don't know about you, but I had never heard anyone chew someone out in the tongue they learned on their mission. It's not that Cooper was silently taking it. He had quite a bit to say as well…in Swedish.

I don't speak the language, but when your mom's Swedish, her siblings call all the time, you know she's talking about you, and you want to know what she's saying, you pick some words. The words/phrases I understood from their heated conversation included…yes, no, back off, red, three, girl, sister…among other words, but nothing made sense.

While Will and Cooper were still going at it in tongues, Cory and Zach approached me.

"Are you okay?" Zach asked.

_Emotionally? No! Physically? _"I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" Cory asked. "You were looking at that guy like he was a vampire ready to bit or a dementor ready to kiss or an alien sent to…"

"Yeah," Zach said. "I'm not talking from much experience, but I'd never try to kiss a girl that looked as scared of me as you did of him."

Tears threatened to flow. I was scared…freaked beyond imagination. I was still VL. It was just a first date…not even a romantic date. I didn't expect Cooper to…or ever try to…., but…_Shouldn't I want Cooper to kiss me?_

After Will and Cooper abruptly stopped arguing, Cooper cleared his throat and gave me a weak smile. "Well, thanks for coming, Red. It was fun. I'll see you Friday."

"Yeah…thanks," I swallowed. "S-see ya."

After receiving a final glare from Will, Cooper hopped in his car and speed away. I turned toward Will. His eyes had softened, but that didn't make him anymore approachable. A black smudge ran along the right side his clenched jaw, and his hair wasn't styled to its normal gelled perfection. It looked like someone rubbed a balloon against it. His hands were filthy, and a couple black drip lines ran up one of his arms. He wore dirty, navy jeans and a faded black shirt with its sleeves pushed up.

At the time, it would've been hard for me to explain what affect Will's appearance had on my insides, but I did know that…black on Will…should be illegal. The shirt fit him well—dang well, but I didn't dwell on that because Will Grandison almost witnessed Cooper McCoy kissing me.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him, but my voice was barely above a whisper.

Cory answered for him…pointing to his weather worn Mazda still on jacks, "Will's changing my oil."

"Isn't it against the apartment contract to work on cars in the parking lot?"

"My uncle owns the place," Zach said. "I asked him if we could."

"Oh." I looked down.

"You shouldn't let a guy take advantage of you like that," Will said.

"He wasn't taking advantage of me," I said.

"When a guy scares you with his advances, say something or move if you can't think of what to say. The worse thing you can do is to stand there and take it."

"What if I wanted it?" I said still looking down.

"That would be a different story," he said. "I wouldn't have said anything if I thought you wanted it. I don't think I've ever seen a girl look so terrified. You obviously weren't ready for it, and he should have seen that."

I knew that Will, who happened to be everywhere I didn't want him to be, was right. _Gah! __And why did Cooper choose a parking lot to make a move? Why did he make a move at all? Why did I feel like I was being attacked? _I broke down, and tears sprayed out of my eyes in front of Zack, Cory, and…_dang it all_…Will. I turned my back on them and ran to my apartment.

I stopped before entering my apartment. I didn't want my roommates to see me hysterical. I was determined that no one else would know just what happened (well…actually if I had it my way, I would erase the witnesses' memories). When I entered the apartment, Katie was on the couch reading.

"Where is everyone?" I said.

"Out," Katie said. "Where've you been?"

"Out," I said.

"I thought you were playing Ultimate."

"Then why'd you ask me where I'd been?" I snapped.

She shrugged, but smirked. "Did Ian take you?"

"No," I said.

"You're lying, Red."

I bit my tongue and walked to my room.

"Emily wants you to call her cell," she called.

After I showered, dried, and dressed, I picked up the phone in the kitchen to call Emily, but I heard a knock at the front door. Katie wasn't making a move to open it, so I opened it. When I saw Will leaning against our door post…all fine looking in his I'd-been-working-on-cars attire, I shut the door.

"Who was that?" Katie asked.

"Nobody," I said.

The knock came again.

"Don't answer it," I said.

"Why not?" She asked standing up. The knock came again, and she took a step closer toward the door.

"Don't let him in," I pleaded.

"Oh, it's a boy?" Katie cried and ran to open the door. "Come on in, Will!"

Will smirked, "Thanks, Katie," and stepped in.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"You're being rude, Red," Katie said.

Maintaining the smirk, Will asked, "May I wash my hands?"

"Guys can't use our bathroom," I said.

Will sighed, "I could wash my hands in your kitchen."

"No," I said. "You should leave."

"Red," Katie gasped and then pointed to Will. "A hot guy like that would look nice in our kitchen."

"Katie!" I cried.

Will's smirk morphed into a broad smile.

"Why don't you use Zach and Cory's?" I said.

"Uh…Red," Katie said. "Why would a hot guy want to use a guy's kitchen when he can use a girl's?"

"She has a point, Red," Will said.

"He can't use a girl's if the girl doesn't want him within a twenty mile radius of her," I said.

"You forget, Red," Katie said. "You're not the only girl here." She walked over to Will, grabbed his arm, and led him to the kitchen sink. "I happen to like having hot guys in my kitchen."

I grunted and retreated to my bedroom. I paced back and forth while listening to what was going on in the kitchen. The water was rushing, and Katie was giggling while she sang a medley of songs. _What the heck?_ I pressed my ear against the door. She was singing a mixture of pop and primary songs, but only one line or two of them. Beneath that, I heard something faint. I opened the door to see if I could hear it better, but no…I had to walk toward the kitchen. I stopped dead in my tracks when I realized what it was…Will's laugh.

They stopped laughing when I rushed into the kitchen. Will was scrubbing off the smudge on his jaw line, and Katie was sitting on the counter next to him. Will paused to look at me and smiled.

I glared at Katie. "What were you singing to him?"

"The songs you sing when you're asleep."

"You didn't,' I gasped.

"I can't give your facial expressions justice, though." Katie sighed. "Emily has more practice."

Will laughed under his breath.

It was the second time that semester I fought the urge to strangle Katie.

"So, Red," Will said. "Did you have fun playing Ultimate?"

"How do you know where we were?" I asked.

"Ian called me," he said.

Katie smirked, "I knew you went with Ian,"

"Ian didn't take me," I said. "Cooper did."

"Who is Cooper?" She asked.

Will said, "Watch out for McCoy."

"Who is McCoy?" Katie pouted.

"I think he has a girlfriend…or two," he said.

"Ooo, a player," Katie said. "I'd watch out for him, too, Red."

"How do you know?" I asked Will.

"Ian told me," he said.

"How does he know?"

"He tells me what he sees."

"Cooper wouldn't have a girlfriend if he tried to…"

Will lifted an eyebrow and folded his arms.

"What did this guy try to do?" Katie asked.

I swallowed, "Why would Cooper want to…kiss someone else if he has a girlfriend?"

"Uh…Red," Katie said. "That's the definition of a player."

As Will stared at his reflection in the microwave…trying straighten out his hair, he said, "I've asked him several times, Red, but I've never gotten a straight answer." When he gave up on his hair, he said, "Thanks, Katie." He gazed at me a second before smirking. As he left the apartment, he whistled one of the songs that Katie, Jenna, and Emily insist that I sing in my sleep. _Gah!_

Katie sighed, "I told you he'd look nice in our kitchen."


	13. Chapter 12

Author's note and FYI: During the Sunday School hour at church, you have several options for class you can choose from. In the singles ward I attended in college, you had the option to attend Gospel Doctrine (we're they discuse the scriptures), Gospel Essentials (discuse basic principles of the gospel), or Marriage and Family Prep. class (for engaged people or people that wanted to go). The _Daily Universe _is BYU's campus newspaper. I know my chapters are inconsistent in length, but I basically write until I've accomplished what I want in my outline and then post. So I guess they're more sections than chapters.

Chapter 12

Emily and Kyle didn't sit together in sacrament meeting at church on Sunday as they had the last couple of weeks. In fact, Emily sat on one side of the room while Kyle sat on the other…causing quite a stir in our ward. I didn't think that people would notice, but apparently when you sit in the front rows at church, your life might as well be on the front page of the tabloids. I sat with Emily of course, and much to the merriment of Jenna and Katie, Ian chose to sit next to me as opposed to Kyle and Will.

While Emily conducted the music, she warned me that she'd keep her eyes on me to avoid any chance of eye content with Kyle. I plastered a smile on my face while singing to keep Emily's countenance bright until I noticed the bishopric behind her giving me odd looks, Emily failing to keep herself from giggling, and Ian shaking with laughter next to me. I toned down my facial expressions. I knew that the bishopric already thought I was odd, but I didn't want them to think I was an escaped wooden doll from Disneyland, the "It's a Small World" ride.

In Sunday School, I sat with Ian and Emily again. Jenna, Katie, and the girls from apartment 14 were giggling behind us, and I heard them whispering about the guys in apartment 4. I couldn't help laughing. Ian asked me what was up.

"Apparently, Jordan Height's biceps are amazing," I said. "I can't believe I haven't noticed."

Ian smirked and deepened his voice, "How could you...with me around…" He flexed. The definition in his biceps could be seen through his white dress shirt.

"True," I said feigning amazement. "Jordan has nothing on you."

Next too my ear, Katie said, "Ooo, Ian's flexing for you."

I was tempted to say something not very nice, but luckily Sunday School began.

After the prayer, Will Grandison stood up in front of the class, buttoned up his suit coat, and addressed the class with a soft, bright countenance. Embarrassingly enough, I caught myself gaping at him…again. You'd think after seeing him transform into his teaching mode a couple of times that I'd get used to it. Think again. With his jaw completely relaxed and his eyebrows raises in anticipation, his lips formed a confident, yet inviting smile as he spoke. His eyes brightened as he outlined the teachings of Christ we were going to talk about that day. He immediately started a discussion and called upon volunteers by name to share their comments, and he maintained the bright countenance throughout their comments.

_Who are you? What do you do with the other Will Grandison while you're teaching?_

He even laughed at himself when he caught a spelling mistake he made on the chalkboard. _Gah!_ I really didn't think any guy could have made himself hotter in my eyes than Will did in those 20 or so minutes I watched him teach. _But this is still Will Grandison…the guy who glares, scowls, and makes it a point to be a thorn in my side._

When my thoughts finally started to dwell on the lesson…not on Will himself, I felt a tap on my shoulder and heard Jenna's voice whisper, "So…you want to try now to tell me that you and Ian aren't a couple?"

"What?"

She pointed to Ian's arm around my chair.

_Would the fact that I didn't notice help my case?_ "He's not touching me," I said. "Besides, he's a big guy who needs his space."

Despite my rebuttal, Jenna giggled and then started whispering to the other girls.

_Cheese!_

"What's up?" Ian asked me.

"They think we're a couple because you have you're arm around my chair," I said. "What grade do they think we're in?"

"Let's make it high school, freshman year during a biology movie."

He rapped his arm around me and pulled me toward him…which greatly stimulated the giggling and whispering behind us.

Even I giggled as I elbowed him in the rips. "I did not do this in freshman biology."

"You never lived then," he sighed. "That's a shame."

Someone poked me on the other side.

"What?" I said.

Emily was pointing to the front of the classroom. Will wasn't talking. He was glaring at Ian and me. In fact, the entire classroom was staring at us.

"What'd we do?" I whispered to Emily.

"You're distracting Will," she said.

"Oh."

As Ian took his arm from around me, Will smirked, "There's no PDA in this classroom."

"Sorry, man," Ian said looking as if he was about to stand up. "We'll take it to Marriage Prep."

I elbowed him in the ribs again while half of the class laughed and the other half stared/glared. After the laughter died down, Will promptly gave some last thoughts, bore his testimony, and sat down for the closing prayer.

After the guys left the girls alone for Relief Society, girls approached me and asked, "So…what's up with you and Ian?"

For the 1,000,000,000,000th time…plus one, I said, "We're just friends."

Then the girls looked behind me for a second opinion from Jenna and Katie.

_Like they would know better than me._

"Emily," I said as we were in the privacy of our bedroom after church. "Why does the entire Relief Society think Ian and I are together?"

Emily folded her arms and stared at me.

"Okay, what happened in Sunday School was bad," I said. "…but still…can't they see that Ian's just messing around?"

"Do I need to remind you that we go to a BYU singles ward and nearly everyone has marriage somewhere on their mind…not to mention the mindset that excess public flirting equals that-guy-is-taken? The logic's not perfect, but you can't control people's assumptions."

"But really, Emily," I said. "Why can't people take my word for it?"

"Just think of that line, 'she doth protest too much, me thinks.'"

"But I don't. I only say, 'we're just friends.' I don't yell or curse or start monologuing. Well, I yelled at Zach when he asked me about it, but…um…other than that I…"

"Red," Emily sighed. "Do you even know for sure that Ian's messing around?"

I sighed. _Is there anything I can say? _I thought of Brit-n-Tiff. "He has the human equivalents of Barbie and her brunette counterpart plastered to his side when he's not hanging out with the FHE group…or sleeping. Why would he be interested in me when he has them?"

"Maybe he likes Barbie's redheaded counterpart the best."

_Huh…I never had a redheaded Barbie._ I sat down of my bed and laughed at my next thought. "Maybe we're all just apart of his collection of dolls."

Emily didn't laugh. She glared at me.

"Sorry. I don't mean to sound…anti-feministic, and okay…I admit Ian and I flirt. But there's nothing more than that between us." I said.

"Do you hear what I'm asking, though?" she said. "Are you certain you're right?"

I didn't answer. Truth is…I couldn't answer. _Well, I guess I'm not._

"Red, you need to talk to him. I don't think you'll start getting people off your case until you can personally quote him or whatever," Emily said.

After a moment of silence between us, she shook her head and laughed. "I can't believe after Will told him no PDA in class, he said…"

"You don't need to remind me," I groaned.

Emily laughed harder. "If you want my advice, I recommend talking with him sooner rather than later."

I knew she was right, and second thoughts about Ian possibly wanting us to be more than just friends were brewing inside me. I even wondered why I hadn't asked myself yet if I wanted to be more than just friends with Ian. As I tried picturing Ian and me as a couple, I giggled thinking, _well…brute strength and loud laughter is better than plaid any day. But is it what I want?_ I couldn't answer that, and I figured it'd be best to know what he thought of me first.

I wondered when I could get a chance to talk to him. I couldn't do it during FHE. Everyone there would be eavesdropping. During the week would be tough because of class, and I didn't think it'd be a good conversation to have over the phone.

"Why not now?" I said out loud.

"What?" Emily said.

"Ask him about it."

"Now?"

"Now."

"Okay," she said slowly. "But shouldn't you…"

Her voiced was drowned out by Jenna's and Katie's giggling as I stepped out of our room.

"Where are you going, Red?" Jenna asked.

"To 'the house.'" I said.

"To talk to Ian?" Katie smiled.

"Yes," I said…wincing.

"Wait one moment," Katie cried. "We've got some things for you."

Jenna and Katie ran to their room and brought back bridal magazines and engagement ring ads I recognized from the _Daily Universe_.

"No," I said backing away from them. "I'm not taking those."

"Come on, Red." Katie said.

"You need to talk about it with Ian," Jenna said.

As they tried handing me the magazines and ads, I lunged to the door and got out just in time.

As I rang the doorbell, I felt that I probably should have called Ian before coming, but…_oh well_. Will answered the door and stared at me with his arms folded.

_Very welcoming._ "Um…" I cleared my throat. "Is Ian here?"

He nodded.

"Can I talk to him?"

He nodded, but he didn't move.

"Can I come in?"

He finally stood aside. "He's in the kitchen," he said.

Inwardly, I said a silent prayer asking that Will wouldn't follow me in the kitchen, but it didn't work. _Why can't other people's agency be taken away sometimes?_ I reminded myself, though, that the guy did live here and had more right to be in his kitchen than I did. Thus resigned, I sighed. We entered the kitchen to see Ian sitting at the table eating cereal.

"Hey, Red," Ian cried with his mouth full. "What's up?"

"Can I talk to you?" I said.

"Sure."

While telling Will telepathically to leave us alone, I eyed him as he filled a glass with water, and I continued staring at him and sending him messages as he drank. When Will finally sat the glass down, he let out a short, quiet laugh. "Don't worry, Red. I'm leaving, but you don't need to be that nervous." He motioned towards my hand buttoning and unbuttoning the top button of my shirt. "Ian's almost the easiest guy to have this conversation with."

"What? I'm not nervous," I said, but my voice cracked. Will smirked and left the kitchen with out another word.

Ian laughed while he got up to put his dishes and the cereal away. After he sat back down, he motioned for me to sit across from him and said, "So, what do you want to talk about?"

I stared at Ian for a moment. _Will apparently knows why I'm here._ "Don't you know?"

"I have my guesses…tomorrow's FHE, paint balling equipment, my brilliance and perfection, or…" Ian laughed. "…what happened today in Sunday School."

I sat down across from Ian, but stared at my hands.

"What's bugging you, Red?" Ian said.

I took a deep breath and looked at Ian's smiling face. "Everyone's been asking me what's up between you and me."

"Everyone?" Ian raised an eyebrow.

"I believe a representative or three of every female apartment, condo, and house in the ward has asked me…even my own roommates...a couple of times each."

Ian laughed. "Some of them have been bugging me about it, too."

"What? What'd you say?"

"What'd you say?" He countered.

"I asked you first."

"Fair enough." He sighed. "I told them we've been secretly engaged for 6 years."

"What!" I cried.

He burst out laughing.

"Ian, tell me what you really said," I demanded.

He continued to laugh, but managed to say, "I told you. That's what I said."

My face heated up. "Ian! Why'd you…do you know…what the heck…how could you…"

"Whoa, Red," he said. "They knew I was joking."

"Don't be so sure." I rubbed my forehead with the palms of my hands.

"Come on, Red," Ian smirked. "Six years?"

"I know, but Jenna and Katie have been saving the ring ads from the _Daily Universe,_ and they bought me a couple bridal magazines as well. They wanted me to bring them to show you."

Ian almost fell back off the bench in laughter.

"It's not funny." I said, but I couldn't keep from laughing for long.

Ian said, "Now…what'd you say about us?"

"We're just friends," I said.

"And no one believed you?" Ian smiled.

"Obviously," I said. "Emily told me that girls are crossing you off the ward directory as taken."

"That's a shame."

"Well, it's your fault."

Ian laughed. "Why is it my fault?"

"We flirt."

"And that's my fault."

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Because…" The truth hit me hard. I almost felt like crying as I spat the reason out. "…because you're fun to flirt with."

And I thought Ian couldn't laugh any louder. "Gah, if only more girls felt the way you do," he said.

I couldn't help laughing with him, but I was determined to dig the blunt truth out of him. I came to hear what he thought of me. I was not leaving until I did."Ian," I said slowly. "If you were asked at gun point, 'what's up with you and Red?' what would you say?"

"Do you really want to know?" he smirked.

I gulped as I nodded.

Ian said, "I would say that I don't know, but I wish we were engaged."

I waited for a punch line, but none came. Nothing in his looks gave way that his sincerity was feigned. My throat went dry, my forehead collected sweat, and my left leg started twitching. "You can't be serious," I whispered.

Slowly and steadily, a smile grew on his face. It didn't take long before his boisterous laughter filled the entire house.

"Ian," I cried as I wiped my forehead. "Be serious. Are we friends? Do you really want to be more than just friends? What are we?"

After he took a deep breath and cleared his throat, he looked me in the eye and said, "You are the sister I never had." Then he reached across the table to poke me in the stomach.

"Are you serious?" I asked.

"As much as you'll get from me."

"You swear?"

"That's a low blow," Ian smirked. "I never thought Miss Red Ashby would have me swear."

"Pinky swear?"

Ian shook his head, "Read my lips. We are friends…nothing more and nothing less."

I thought relief would be my initial reaction, but it wasn't. I bit my bottom lip. _Didn't he say what I wanted? Why did it hurt to hear it? _

"You still don't believe me." He laughed and shook his head, luckily misinterpreting my reaction. "Let me tell you this way, Red. Even if I did want to be more than just friends with you, I wouldn't go for it."

"Why not?" I tried to sound teasing. "I'm not hot enough for you?" …but a part of me really wanted to know.

Ian rolled his eyes. "Woman, you're plenty hot, but…" He leaned closer to me and whispered, "You're marked by a guy I'd never cross."

"What?"

"He's in denial of course, but for his sake I hope that doesn't last long."

"Who are you talking about?"

"A real guy who puts Sean Connery, Pierce Brosnan, and that blond dude, um…Daniel Craig, to shame." He waited for me to say something. "You've got to have a guess who it is."

I shook my head. The only person I had heard him use the Bond analogy for was Will, but I knew that pigs would fly on the day Will Grandison would stop glaring at me.

Ian rubbed his chin and smiled. "Coincidentally, he's your type—tall, dark, and um…good looking for a guy." Ian paused to laugh. "He has an impressive build for a guy who's quintessentially a nerd. I have no idea why he studies all the time. The guy's a genius. Sometimes I wonder if he's really secretly trying to take over the world in his spare time."

He smiled and sat reflecting before he continued, "Most people don't know this, but he's musically inclined. That's how he used to woo his women…back in the day. He can cook, clean, fix cars, and knows jujitsu and judo." He sighed. "He's practically perfect in everyway."

"A male Mary Poppins?" I asked.

Ian winced, "That makes him sound in touch with his feminine side."

"But you said he can cook and clean."

"Red, believe me. It's good to have manly men in this world who can cook and clean," he said. "But the James Bond image works better."

"The man every guy wants to be?"

Ian winced again. "Should be if you miraculously tweaked Bond's morals. He's the type that beats himself up if he doesn't do his home teaching at the beginning of the month."

"And that's a good thing?"

"Look at it this way, Red," he said. "He fears no man."

I rested my chin in a fist as I tried to digest what Ian was telling me, but I couldn't buy it. "A guy like that wouldn't like me."

"Why not?"

"Why not! I'm Red, the golfer, with no last name."

"Oh…" He snickered. "He knows your last name."

I was ready to argue more, but Kyle walked in. I grimaced at his entrance, but I reminded myself of my determination to love him as a neighbor despite how he lead Emily on.

"What are you guys talking about?" Kyle asked as he walked toward the refrigerator.

"Our resident James Bond," Ian said.

Kyle screeched to a stop. "You didn't tell her that…"

"I didn't mention names."

"She hasn't guessed?"

"Not yet anyway."

"You shouldn't have said anything." Kyle opened the fridge and took out a casserole dish. "He'll kill you."

"Yeah, but it's nothing I can't handle." Ian grinned.

"True, but you're cutting it close." Kyle said.

"Hardly. Listen…" Ian stood up and started whispering to Kyle.

_How rude!_ I crossed my arms.

When Ian stopped whispering, they both turned to look at me, and Kyle said, "If you think…"

Ian nodded.

"It couldn't hurt," Kyle said.

"Alright," Ian rubbed his hands together. "Story time with Ian Laird."

"Why don't you just tell me his name?" I said.

Ian glanced at Kyle, and Kyle mouthed, "No."

"It's better for all of us this way," Ian said.

I rolled my eyes. "Are you sure we shouldn't just stop talking about it altogether?"

"Trust me, Red," Ian smiled. "This is for the greater good."

"Okay," I sighed.

"Okay," Ian said. "When I was…let's see…almost eleven and he was twelve, an idiot neighbor of mine brought out his dad's twelve gage to show off while we were shooting hoops on our cul-de-sac. While the idiot was showing it to some other kids, I noticed that the gun was pointing at me…and so did our young James Bond. He pushed me out of the way as the gun went off. The shot hit him in the legs."

Ian paused for a moment. I was speechless. I looked at Kyle…hoping he'd comment, but he was putting a plate of food in the microwave.

Ian continued, "He passed out from the pain or the loss of blood, but one of the kids' moms was an ER nurse, and luckily for him and the rest of us, she was at home and heard the shot. Our Bond still has the scars."

I shook my head.

"Hard to believe, huh." Ian smiled.

I continued to shake my head, and I laughed. "It's too crazy to believe. He was shot by a shot gun? Why was it loaded in the first place?"

Ian sighed, "Why doesn't anyone believe me when I tell it?"

"Because it's you telling it." Kyle said.

"Why do people believe him when he tells it?"

"People can take him seriously." Kyle said.

"People can take me seriously." Ian said, but then both Kyle and Ian laughed.

"Okay," I exclaimed. "I should go now."

"Aw, Red," Ian said. "Don't you want to more hear crazy stuff about our James Bond?"

"There's more?"

"There's that time he got into a knife fight on his mission."

I think I successfully bit back the initial shock at Ian's statement to take a quick look at Kyle who sighed, laughed, and rolled his eyes. I smirked, "How about some other time."

Ian pouted a second before laughing. "Alright, some other time." Then he started scratching the back of his head. "So…you and I…are we good then? Friends?"

"Yeah," I smiled.

He opened up his arms for a hug, and I gladly accepted. Although his back cracking hug relieved the physical tension inside me, I wasn't sure why I still felt hurt about Ian telling me he didn't want to be more than friends. _Well, according to Ian a mysterious James Bond character likes me...or is in denial about it. Whatever._ …but I had to ask, "Why's your James Bond friend in denial?"

"He's had bad luck with redheads, but he's had a thing for them since way before puberty hit."

"Oh." I giggled while subconsciously touching my hair. "Did he have a streak of bad redheaded girlfriends?"

Ian laughed, "You could say that."

"Ian," said Kyle in a warning tone.

Ian ignored him. "You could also say that all his girlfriends, all of which redheads, found themselves in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong guy."

"Ooh. Wow." _That was blunt._ "Um…yeah…well…thanks for the talk, Ian. I'll see you guys later."

"Yeah, see ya tomorrow, Red," Ian said.

I smiled at Kyle who promptly smiled and gave a quick nod back, but as I walked toward the front door, I heard footsteps rushing after me.

"Red," Kyle called.

"Yeah?"

He cleared his throat and stepped closer to me. He said softly, "How's Emily?"

_What can I say? Terrible. She's still pining over you. Why are you asking me and not her?_ "Did you tell her what you wanted me to tell her?" _...before I so gracefully interrupted you and kept you from telling me._

He looked down at my shoes in response.

"Talk to her. She deserves to know what you're not telling her," I said and left.

When I got home, Jenna and Katie were eager to know how my discussion went with Ian.

"You can think what you want," I announced. "But Ian and I are just friends."

They both giggled. I sighed and walked toward my room.

* * *

Monday went by in one huge blur, but on Tuesday morning, I didn't want to get out of bed. My stomach felt like crap.

"Red!" Emily's voice cried.

I opened my eyes, "What?"

"Get up. It's 8:37."

"Shoot!" I sat up, but groaned as my stomach complained about my jerky movement.

Emily studied my face, "Maybe you should stay in bed. You don't look so good."

"I don't understand," I said. "I felt fine last night."

"Was it something you ate?"

I shrugged, and I could tell Emily was switching to her motherly mode.

Emily's eyes narrowed. "What did you eat?"

I swallowed. Yesterday wasn't good…eating wise. Between classes, tutoring, study groups, and FHE, I didn't eat much at all, and what I did eat…well, lets just say that my mom and Emily wouldn't have been proud.

"Do you have any soup?" She asked.

I shook my head.

"I have chicken noodle and tomato. Promise me you'll drink fluids." She looked at her cell phone. "I have to go, or I'll be late." She turned to leave, but stopped at the doorway and sighed. "Red, this isn't a good time to be sick."

"You think I'm happy about it?" I said.

"I think you could've avoided it by eating better."

"Eating habits don't prevent all sickness."

"I think it can…at least more than you realize."

I sighed.

"I hope you feel better," she said.

"Thanks," I said. _You, too…about Kyle I mean._

I didn't get any better that day. I tossed and turned in bed as my stomach decided to take up break dancing and my head yearned to bang against drums, and the thought of eating set my stomach churning. That night's rest didn't supply any relief. Emily insisted that I try some runny cream of wheat for breakfast. I had some of it after I stared at the bowl for a good ten minutes, but my body started yelling at me to lie back down.

To mix things up a bit, I laid on the couch with a blanket instead of my bed, turned on the TV, and fell asleep to the home and garden network.

I woke up to a knock at the door, but my body wouldn't sit up. I turned my head to read the VCR clock…8:42. My eyes widened. I had been asleep for eight hours…since the time I forced myself to eat tomato soup for lunch.

"Emily, Katie, Jenna," I called.

No answer. The only noises in the apartment were the air-conditioning and HGTV. As I turned off the TV, the knock came again.

_Well, the door isn't locked. _I swallowed and cried, "Come in."

Ian burst through the door while Will stood in the doorway behind him. "Red," Ian said. "What took you…what's wrong with you?"

"I'm sick," I said. "Do you need anything? No one else is here."

"Why are you're sick?" Will said.

As Will stared at me lying down in a t-shirt and bright pink pajama bottoms, I remembered an article of feminine clothing that I never put on that day and pulled my blanket up to my neck."What are you guys doing here?" I said.

Ian laughed and looked at Will.

Will cleared his throat. "James and Jason are in town, and the entire baseball team took over the house. We need a place to study."

They did have bags and stuff to study with them, but…"Why don't you guys go to the library?"

Ian laughed again. Will glared at him, and I waited for an answer.

"Then we wouldn't have this opportunity to take care of you, Red," Ian smirked.

"You should probably leave. You don't want to catch what I have."_ Gah! Why did I even let them in?_

Will walked closer to me and studied me and my surroundings. "Have you drunk anything today?"

No, I hadn't, but I wasn't going to answer him.

Will shook his head. He pulled out an unopened Gatorade from his bag and walked to the kitchen.

"Hey, wait," I cried. "I can get myself a drink. Water's just fine." I forced my body to stand up with the blanket around me and followed Will to the kitchen, but…

"Um, Red," Ian said, "you're not walking in a straight line."

"I'm fine," I said, but my stomach twisted, churned, and begged me to lie back down as I continued toward the kitchen.

After Will got out a glass and filled it with Gatorade, he glared at me. "You shouldn't have gotten up."

I did make it to the kitchen, but the kitchen started swaying. The cabinet of dishes, Will and well…everything else for that matter disintegrated into darkness.

My eyes opened to Ian's and Will's furrowed brows. I was used to Will's, but Ian's scared me. They were staring at something above my head. I slowly turned my head on the cold kitchen floor. I couldn't see what they were looking at and gave up looking to find Ian smiling and Will scowling at me.

"Welcome back, Red," Ian said.

I blinked a couple of times.

"You passed out," Ian said.

"You hit your head on a cupboard on the way down," Will said.

"Your head won," Ian smirked. "The cupboard door's smashed."

I blinked a couple more times.

"You ready to get off the linoleum?" Ian asked.

I don't know what kind of response I made. I remember wanting to stay where I was, but Ian must have taken whatever I did to mean yes. After he got me on my feet, my stomach vehemently protested the distance between itself and the floor, and I knew that whatever was in my stomach was not going to stay there for long and that I would never make it to the bathroom alone. Luckily, Ian had me standing in front of the kitchen sink. I leaned over and proceeded to unload, but no vomit came out until after a couple of dry heaves. The relief in my stomach was immediate and if someone told me I was walking on air, I would have believed him. Fortunately, I did remember to turn on the water and start the disposal.

"That was attractive," Ian said.

Holding on to the sink for support, I pivoted my body to face Ian, but Will was in the way. His hand was griping my arm. I dared myself to look at his face. A glare…what did I expect, but as I studied the glare, I wondered if it was really a glare at all.

For some reason…against all logic, Will's intense gaze triggered a smile from me, and I said the first thing that came to my mind. Well, um…I sang the first thing that came to my mind. "I feel pretty. Oh, so pretty. I feel pretty and witty and gay."

While Ian snickered, the corners of Will's mouth curved upward slowly, but I abruptly stopped singing when my head started throbbing. I shut my eyes. When I opened them, my body was leaning against Will's. I gasped. _What am I doing_? I raised my head to look at Will. Yep, it was definitely a glare from him that time, but moving didn't sound like fun to me and of all the bodies I could be leaning against…_hehe_. Yeah, I'm not too proud of my thoughts at that moment, but I thankfully reminded myself that the gorgeous body belonged to Will Grandison. And unfortunately, bodies and personalities can't be separated. "I'm sorry," I said. "But my…my head hurts."

"I bet it does," Ian said

"You should lie down," Will said.

"Don't state the obvious, Will," Ian smirked. "Pick her up and take her to the couch."

"No."

"Why not?"

"She can walk," Will said.

"I don't want to walk," I said, and yes, I think I was pouting and whining.

I didn't hear a response to my comment. I lifted my head tentatively to see Will's face. He wasn't glaring anymore. Both eyebrows were raised. I smiled.

Ian snickered, "You know you want to."

Thanks to Ian…Will's glare came back along with a clenched jaw. I pouted.

"I bet you'd rather have Ian do it," Will said to me.

"True," I said, "but that means he'll have to move and you'll have to move and I'll have to move and the kitchen will start moving again. The kitchen's not supposed to move. Will, I don't want the kitchen to start moving again."

Will stared at me for awhile. I smiled at him, and he said slowly, "Red, you should lie down."

That's when reality hit me (to a certain extent). I swallowed…tasting my awful throw-up breath which kicked in rational thinking (again, to a certain extent). _What am I doing leaning my entire body weight on Will? What am I doing wanting to be carried to the coach? And why in the heck do I want Will to do it?_

With new found resolve, I leaned away from Will and balanced myself on my two feet, but Will still held on to my arm. "Let go," I told him. "I'm walking without help."

"But the kitchen will start moving," Ian laughed.

"I'm walking without help," I repeated.

"Well," Ian said skeptically. "Let's see if you can reach me first."

I started walking toward Ian…one foot in front of the other. After I took a couple steps, I felt a little more confident about moving, but that's when the throbbing in my head augmented, the kitchen started swaying, and …

Well, that's all I remember. I woke-up a couple hours later on the couch with Emily peering over me.

"Good," she sighed. "You're alive." When Emily saw that I was sitting up, she cried, "Slowly!"

"Please," I whined. "Don't yell."

"Will left this Gatorade for you. I wish he got something down you before you passed out again."

"What?"

"Drink." She thrust the Gatorade in my hands and stared at me while I took a sip. "Why did you have to get sick?"

"It's not my fault."

"We were going to Vegas for general conference. We were going to leave tomorrow night." Emily looked at the floor. "I don't think we should go anymore."

"I'm sorry, Em." I stared at the floor with her. It was going to be our last fling before we went our separate ways. Emily had a job in San Diego that started the next week after graduation. Moreover, Emily needed a break from Provo…pronto. Maybe being with her parents for conference weekend would help her get over Kyle. Impulsively, I said, "Take my car."

"What'd you say?" she said.

"You should still go. You deserve the break. Take my car and go."

"Red, what if I wreck? or get pulled over?"

"It won't happen."

Emily folded her arms.

"Look," I rolled my eyes. "I'm not sure what normal people do in this situation, but I'll sign a note giving my permission or whatever. I'm sure it'll hold up in court if not to the police. Thanks to my dad…I do own the car, and yes…we've already established years ago that I'm a spoilt brat."

She stared at me for a moment. "Why are you doing this?"

I looked away from her. _Love. _I felt awkward even thinking it.

She smiled as if she knew my thoughts and tackled me…hugged me.

"Watch it, Emily!" I said. "Space…I need space."

She got off me with tears in her eyes. "Thank you."

"No problem."

"Now, go brush your teeth," Emily said. "Your breath reeks."

"I've got to move?" I whined.

"Come on." She slapped me on my knee. "I'll walk with you, but drink more first."

As we walked toward the bathroom, an outburst of giggles came from Jenna and Katie's room.

"What's that about?" I asked.

"Oh," Emily suppressed a giggle. "You've finally convinced them that you and Ian aren't secretly dating…or engaged."

I stopped walking. "What'd I do? I was asleep."

"Jenna and Katie walked in while Will was carrying you to the couch."

"What?"

Katie opened her door, leaned against it, and sighed. "It was like right out of a romance novel."

_Oh, no. No. Please, no._ With newfound energy, I rushed (a relative term) into the kitchen. There it was…a cupboard that looked as if someone had kicked it in.

"My head did that? Uh!" I cried. "Why couldn't it have been just a weird dream?"

Katie and Jenna laughed.

Jenna said, "Ian said that you started singing…" Then she broke into song, "I feel pretty. Oh, so pretty."

"And then you begged Will to carry you to the couch," Katie said.

"I did not beg," I cried.

"That's not what Ian said," Katie said.

"Ian exaggerates. Besides, I distinctly remember telling them I wanted to walk to the couch."

"Well, it all turned out for the best," Jenna giggled. "You fainted in Will's arms."

I cringed. I hated the word 'faint.' "I did not faint. I just um…fell asleep um…walking."

Katie and Jenna laughed.

"It's not funny," I said sitting down on the kitchen floor.

"You're right. It's not, but…" Jenna smirked. "Boy! Did you look hot in his arms or what! And the way he looked at you when he laid you down?" She let out a whistle.

"Gah, Jenna! Think about it," I said. "How could Will of all people find me attractive after I gracefully slammed my head against a kitchen cabinet and then pucked a bucket load in the sink."

"It's called love," Jenna said.

"No!" I cried.

"Ian says that you were practically hanging on Will," Katie smirked.

"I wasn't…the entire time," I winced. _Cheese! What was I thinking then?_ "I wasn't mentally all there."

"Will was happy to oblige," Jenna giggled.

"No," I said. "He glared at me the entire time."

"You know, Red," Emily said speaking up for the first time in a while. "I'm not sure if Will's really glaring when you think he's glaring."

"It's love, Red," Jenna giggled and broke into song again. "L is for the way you look at me, O is for the very one I see…" She did a tap dance as well.

I bit my tongue and ran my fingers through my hair.

"Well," Emily said. "You look like you're feeling better."

I took a deep breath. "Throwing up must have been the turning point."

"Or being with Will," Katie giggled. "He gave you the power to over come."

I ignored her and gratefully…so did Emily.

"Come to Vegas with me then." Emily said.

I sighed. "I shouldn't. I can't afford to miss anymore class, and I haven't done anything the last two days."

"And she doesn't want to waste any time that can be spent with Will," Jenna said.

"Ah, to be kissed by Mr. Tall, Dark, and Handsome himself," Katie sighed.

"I'm going to bed," I cried…probably too loudly.

"Pleasant dreams," Katie giggled.

_Gah!_


	14. Chapter 13

Author's note: The WILK is short for the Wilkinson Center Building on BYU campus. I think that's all you need to know for this chapter. It's long. Maybe too long, but I'm excited to finally get to this point in the story.

Chapter 13

I woke up foolishly hoping again that last night was a dream or some figment of my imagination. I even tried to use mind power to fix the broken kitchen cabinet door. Alas…it wasn't meant to be. To say that I felt extremely extremely extremely extremely extremely extremely (yeah, I'm copying and pasting) awkward that morning would be a grossly egregious understatement.

Yet, several times I asked myself why I was making such a big deal out of it. It wasn't like the whole world knows about what happened…only Ian, Emily, Jenna, Kate, and…Will. That's when I'd groan and continue wallowing.

After classes that day, I made my way to the second floor of the WILK overlooking the terrace, a favorite study spot of mine. Once I reached the top, I gasped and stopped dead in my tracks. Will Grandison was asleep with his legs sprawled out, his arms folded and a neglected laptop on a side table. His face was angled away from me, but I'd recognize that head anywhere.

I had never seen him study in the WILK before, and there he was…asleep. I quickly walked away from him and plopped in a vacant chair as far from him as I could get. Willing my mind not to think about him or last night, I worked pretty diligently for the most part and ended up studying for a couple hours before realizing I couldn't do anymore without a computer.

After I finished packing up my stuff, curiosity got the better of me. I had to know if he was still here. I stood up, moved to where I could see, and looked across the terrace. He was still there. Asleep.

_Weird._ I walked toward him. I could see his entire face now and the interestingly large amount of girls (well, six girls…anyway) studying in the chairs and on the floor around him. As I drew nearer, I realized his face looked yellow and heard a girl say, "He doesn't look so good. Should we wake him up?"

"And say what? Hey, sorry to wake you, but you look like you need to hurl," another girl said.

"Gaw, he's hot, though. Do you think he'd give me his number if I asked if I could double check on him later?"

Several girls giggled, but immediately stopped when they saw me walk nearer to Will than they would dare. I peered over him. He did look terrible, and I couldn't remember the last time I had seen a face so yellow. A wave of guilt slapped me. It was my fault he was sick.

I touched his shoulder. "Will," I whispered.

No response.

I spoke his name louder.

No response.

I gently shook his shoulder while saying, "Will, are you okay?"

As his eyes shot open, he jerked upright, but then groaned as he leaned back and closed his eyes again.

Wide eyed, I cried, "What's wrong?"

He slowly opened his eyes, stood up, and quietly asked, "Where's the nearest restroom?"

I pointed across the terrace where I had been studying earlier. "Through those double doors."

He started walking toward it, but as he got halfway there, he started running.

_Huh. _Open mouthed, I sat down where he'd been sleeping for who knows how long. The girls were all looking in the direction Will went. One of them said, "I hope he's alright."

Another one said, "Should one of us go check on him?"

They continued to mutter amongst themselves, but no one stood up or did anything. I figured that I'd stay and watch his stuff.

When he got back, the girls quieted. He looked better…less yellow, but of course, he was glaring at me. I stood up.

"Feel better?" I asked hesitantly.

He didn't answer, but started packing up his laptop.

"Do you need a ride home or anything?" I said.

Again, he ignores me.

I exhaled in frustration, and I grabbed his bag strap as soon as he was done packing it and threw it over my shoulder. I was going to do something nice for him whether he liked it or not.

He's eyes darkened even more as his brow furrowed. "That's not necessary," he said. Then he took the bag off my shoulder and walked in the direction of the restrooms.

I followed…not closely, but followed. He took the closest seat he could to the restrooms and unpacked his stuff again. When he was done unpacking, he looked up at me and said, "I'm fine."

"How could you be fine? You just threw up."

In response, he opened his laptop and began typing.

_He deserves to be sick, Kerstin. Leave._ …but I couldn't.

"I'm sure you have other things to do," he said.

"Of course, but I'm the reason you're sick."

"True." He smirked without looking away from his laptop. "But what can you do?"

"Check on you in the restroom."

He stopped typing and stared at me.

"I have no problem running into a guy's restroom."

His stare turned into a glare. Am I surprised?

I rolled my eyes. "I can make sure you come out of the restroom, and if you don't come out or respond, I'll march in there and slap your face until you wake up."

Surprisingly, he laughed. "I won't pass out."

"How do you know?"

"Oh, I know," he said folding his arms.

"People don't have a choice whether to stay conscious or not if they're sick."

"Last night you had a choice whether to stay on the couch or not."

_Great. A shpeal._

"If you stayed where you were, you would have been fine…for the most part. Even if you stood up slowly, you might have been able to say conscious. But what I don't understand is why you weren't drinking fluids to begin with?" He said some other things about being hydrated, calories, electrolytes and whatever, but all my attention went to his hand pulling out a bottle of Gatorade that was almost gone. An idea bit me.

When he was finished talking, I stood up, "I'll be right back."

"Did you hear anything I said?" His eyes closed while he rubbed the side of his face. "Do you think I enjoy hearing myself talk?"

I smiled. "Sometimes."

Before he could respond to that, I rushed down stairs. I bought two Gatorades, gum (for his throw-up breath), and a sandwich (for myself) from the Cougar Eat. When I got back up stairs, he wasn't there, but his stuff was.

_Should I check on him?_ Thinking of how he looked at me after I told him about my feelings about being in a guy's bathroom, I figured I shouldn't. As I dropped a Gatorade and the gum in his chair, my eyes wondered toward the clock on his laptop and widened. I had forgotten that I'd promised to tutor a group a people…five minutes ago.

From the WILK, I made it to the third floor of the Student Athlete Building in two minutes with only mild complaints from my body…nothing that a sip of Gatorade and a bite of sandwich couldn't handle. Now, all I had to do was lasso all my tutees together.

Amongst all the books, bags, and people sprawled everywhere, I found almost everyone in the computer lab, Trent, Tyler, and Dan (football players), Andrea (Dan's fiancé, a golfer a couple years behind me), and Olivia (Tyler's girlfriend who ran the 400). The only person MIA was Lacy, a hurdler and Olivia's friend whom she tried to hook up with Trent, but Lacy was never interested even though Trent was all for it. It made for some very awkward tutoring sessions.

"Sorry, I'm late," I said. The girls smiled while the guys just shrugged. "Where's Lacy?"

"She's holding one of the rooms for us in the back," said Andrea.

"Good, I'll meet you guys there."

"You might want to knock before you go in," Tyler said. The guys tried to keep themselves from snickering. They weren't successful.

"They're doing it again?" Olivia said rolling her eyes. "I don't understand them. It's not like every student athlete, advisor, and tutor can't see them. There's a window on every door."

"That wouldn't stop them," Tyler said.

"You mean it wouldn't stop him," Olivia said.

Tyler only smirked in response.

"I think it's sick," Olivia said.

"I'll knock loudly," I said wondering if I should wait for someone to go with me, and luckily, Andrea, Dan, and Trent were logged off their computers and ready to go.

"So…what's Lacy doing?" I asked Andrea.

She didn't need to answer because we soon passed a room housing a couple in a mildly heated making out session.

The Student Athlete Building had only been built three years ago, but still…I had never seen anyone making out anywhere inside the building. Heck, I had never seen anyone making out on campus period. The only times I'd ever seen anyone do it in my college experience were in the dorm's lobby freshman year and walking in on roommates and their significant others on the couch, and that only happened a couple of times in the last four and a half years. Social pressure restricted PDA to hand holding, arms around shoulders and rare pecks. In general, people were usually personal about their kisses. I had even heard about couples restricting their private premarital displays of affection to pecks and holding hands. That's BYU for you.

Still, I shouldn't have been too surprised at the sight based on the conversation we had not quite a minute earlier, but what popped my eyes and mouth wide open was the fact that Lacy's make-out partner was Cooper McCoy.

Andrea, who wasn't fazed one bit and had probably interrupted them before, opened the door and walked right in with Dan and Trent behind her. The couple promptly stopped and smiled/giggled at each other. I couldn't move yet. I didn't want to move yet, but that's when Cooper noticed me. An unrepentant smirk replaced his smile. He took a quick glace at Lacy who was now chatting with Andrea and Dan. Olivia and Tyler had by this point walked pass me into the room and were talking with Trent while rearranging the chairs around the table. Then the guys started joking in hushed tones with Cooper while the girls started chastising Lacy about being public with him. Once Cooper packed up his books and stuff to leave, he said, "What's up, Red?"

The room quieted for a split second before side-comments spewed out like rapid spit fire.

"I didn't know he knew Red."

"Maybe she's tutored him before."

"He wouldn't need a tutor."

"McCoy makes it a point to get to know all the female tutors."

"Wasn't it her he took to play Ultimate last week?"

Lacy blanched, and Olivia gasped while everyone else eyed Cooper as he walked toward me. His smirk, his raised eyebrow, and the swagger of his stride were all daring me to do something, but what? Scream, yell, throw a fit, cry, laugh, start singing "You've lost that loving feeling"…all of which crossed my mind, but all I did was stare and gape at him. I hadn't gotten over my initial shock.

I secretly hoped Lacy would say something…start attacking Cooper for making out with her while dating other people on the sidelines, but she didn't look like she could put two words together yet. _I guess she never knew Cooper saw more than one girl at once. Well, I didn't believe anything Will told me about him until now._

I knew I could make the situation really ugly, but I didn't want to. Six people's grades for a test depended on how this tutoring session went. Tutoring sessions usually didn't weigh that much, but I knew none of them have studied much or any if at all for the test they were taking the next day; moreover, me getting sick wasn't convenient for anyone. _Well…first things first, Kerstin. Shut your gaping mouth._

I did so, but that was the easy part.

"Hey," I said managing a polite smile. "We're going over this week's stat homework and doing a quick test review. You want to join us?"

"I didn't know you're taking stats," Lacy said folding her arms. She opened her mouth to say some other things, but Olivia stopped her.

"Can't," Cooper said. His eyes studied me. They were probing for something. Again, I couldn't tell what exactly, but I did try to hide my desire to slap him. _What's up with me and wanting to slap people today? _I blamed Will.

"Aw, come on, McCoy," Dan said. "Join the fun."

Cooper smiled, but shook his head. "I've got some other stuff to do."

"So…I'll see you tomorrow morning for tutoring?" I asked.

"Of course." As he edged pass me out the door, he briefly touched my arm and whispered, "Thanks," in my ear.

_What was that for? Not blowing up? Not making a scene? Boys! Gah! _"I have a few things I want to talk to you about tomorrow," I hissed back.

"I'd be disappointed if you didn't," he said out loud as he walked down the hall and out of sight.

As I walked toward the dry erase maker board and checked which markers worked and which didn't, I dreaded making eye contact with anyone. Cooper wasn't discreet about touching me, and he leaned into me rather closely as he whispered, 'Thanks.' The room was completely silent which is odd for a small space with seven people in it.

I turned around and immediately sensed the loathing radiating out of Lacy, the shock out of Olivia, the sparked curiosity out of the Trent, Tyler and Andrea, and the indifference out of Dan.

"So…" Trent said glancing at Lacy before looking at me. "You and McCoy have a history or a…"

"No," I said quickly… too quickly. _Shoot._

Lacy's loathing wasn't just radiating now. It distorted her features.

"Nothing's ever happened between us." _If you don't count the flirting, hugging, touching, and almost kissing. Cheese! _"I'm just his tutor."

"He usually tutors his tutor in a thing or two," Tyler said, and Olivia stomped on his foot. "What'd I say?"

Lacy was practically crying now.

I looked her in the eye and said, "I promise you that Cooper's never 'tutored' me in anything."

"You played Ultimate with us last Saturday, right?" Trent asked.

I nodded.

"Did Cooper ask you to go with him?" Lacy asked.

"Yes, he took me," I said trying not to wince and waited for her next words, but none came. She quickly picked up her stuff.

"Wait, Lacy, I didn't know. Um…we never…"

She stormed out of the room and slammed the door. I reached to open it, but Andrea said, "No, Red. Let her go."

"She's not mad at you…entirely," Olivia said. "She needs to have a long delayed DTR with Cooper."

"But the stat test…" I said.

Tyler burst out laughing, but quickly stopped when Olivia gave him a look. She said, "She'll be fine. She needs to get this straightened out first."

I didn't think she would be fine based on how she answers questions from the book without my help, but then again, people all have different priorities. As I drew a normal distribution and a couple t-distributions on the dry erase board, I thought, _well, knowing that your make-out buddy is seeing other girls is a big deal... more important than stats. But then why didn't I completely loose it? Didn't I just find out that the guy I like is a player? I only liked him…never kissed him…thanks to Will._

I flushed at the thought. _Gah! Who would have thought I'd be grateful to Will for anything?_ I faced everyone again. Dan looked bored out of his mind and ready to fall asleep at any moment. Andrea and Olivia were chatting a mile a minute while Tyler was eavesdropping and smirking. Trent just sat there smiling at me.

"Well?" he said.

I swallowed. "Well?"

"Let's get this started. I'd like to pass the test tomorrow."

"Okay…right." I cleared my throat. "What can you tell me about the t-distribution?"

0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

When I got to the apartment complex, my car was in the parking lot. _Emily hasn't left yet! _I thought I had once last chance to ditch everything and leave for Vegas, but when I called her name in the apartment, there was no answer. The apartment was vacant, and there was a note on my bed.

"Red," it began. "I wish you had checked your email today. I hoped that you would change your mind about coming to Vegas. I found a group of old friends going home, so I don't need your car. Thanks for offering. You have no idea what it meant to me. Being home (away from…was crossed out) will be nice."

The rest of the note was telling me to make sure Jenna and Katie turn off the lights and TV when they weren't using them, the doors locked at night, and that I don't eat only ramen for meals while she's gone. Then I reached the postscript that said, "You're not going to like this, but I agree with Jenna and Kate. I think Will likes you. I'll talk to you about it later."

_What! How could she think that? She knows that he specifically said that I'm not his type and he doesn't date redheads._ Emily wasn't even there to witness Will refuse to let me help him when I ran into him earlier that day.

I dialed Emily's cell phone number, but was thrown immediately to voice mail. "Hey, Emily. It's me. Call me tonight if it's not too late. Bye."

Despite the tutoring and homework I had to do that Friday, oh, how I wished I was with her!

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

If somebody would have told me the next day, Friday, would have been the worst day of my life, I wouldn't have gotten out of bed the next morning. Well, I would have gotten out of bed for some pain killers just to get back in again, but you get the idea.

I woke up to painful cramps, the kind that feels like someone's beating, stabbing, and scraping the contents of your uterus out with a spoon. I went to the bathroom, and sure enough my period had started a week early. _Perfect._

When I reached for the PopTart box and took it out of the cupboard, it was empty. Somebody had eaten my last Poptart…but then I remembered that I ate it the night before. _Brilliant. _I checked my cupboards and the fridge for cereal or bread or anything breakfasty. Nothing.

While driving to campus, I tried thinking of what I might say to Cooper when I saw him for tutoring, but I couldn't focus. The pain killer that I took when I woke up never kicked in. As soon as I parked the car, I took out the bottle of Tylenol in my bag. Empty. _What!_

As I walked to the library, I got the feeling that Cooper wasn't going to show. Sure enough, Cooper wasn't there. I looked around at other places where he might be and then waited while trying to not squirm in a chair from the pain. The stupid cramps had kicked it up a notch. After twenty minutes, I had had enough and b-lined it to the Twilight Zone (our campus drug store equivalent). I grabbed IBprophine and a pint of ice cream, endured the look from the guy behind the register, and sat at one of the picnic-like tables between the WILK and the library.

Now that I was no longer an athlete I could freely take IBprophine and not worry about failing a drug test. I did, however, read the label to see how many pills they recommended not to exceed in a 6-8 hour period, and then I spilt a few in my hand and swallowed them with a spoon full of ice cream.

_Oh, the miracle of ice cream._

As I savored each spoonful, the pain slowly dissipated, but my nirvana was interrupted by a shadow. I looked up and saw Will Grandison along with his standard set jaw and furrowed brow. I wished the features were sold separately.

"You feeling better from yesterday?" I asked. Not that I cared completely, but it was the polite thing to ask.

"Yeah, it passed quickly. Thanks for the gum and Gatorade."

"You're welcome," I said stuffing another spoonful of ice cream in my mouth, and believe it or not, his narrowed eyes narrowed even more. _Gah! Who does he think he is? _I turned my body away from him. "You shouldn't judge, Will."

He glanced at his cell phone and then leaned forward, placing his hands on the table. "You're eating ice cream at 8:23 in the morning. Am I allowed to be concerned?"

"People eat ice cream at 8:23 in the morning," I glowered.

"Must be a dying breed."

"No, we're alive and thriving. I'm testing to see if it's socially acceptable for us to come out of the closet…or so to speak." I took another bite.

He folded his arms and raised an eyebrow. "Well?"

"Well what?"

He waited for me to guess his thoughts.

"Do I find it socially acceptable?" _Why isn't he leaving me alone?_ "Generally, people are minding their own business…with one exception, but I don't consider you the social norm." _Now go away!_

"Neither do I," he said as he sat down next to me. For a second, his forearms were resting motionlessly on the table, but then he started rubbing his hands together and ran a hand through his hair over his ear. After he turned toward me, his lips parted slightly and then closed.

_Weird. _"Do you want some?" I offered him the spoon.

"Uh…no."

_Then what do you want?_

He cleared his throat. "Are you free around 7 tonight?"

I dropped my spoon, but he caught it before it hit my lap and placed it in the pint container while I choked on ice cream. Though wheezing and coughing, I asked, "Why do you want to know?"

"I want to make sure you have one decent meal today. You've been sick."

"So have you."

"I want a decent meal, too."

_Is he really asking me out? _"But you said you don't date redheads."

He studied me a bit before a corner of his mouth turned up. "Are you going to hold me to it?"

"Yes."

"Even if I tell you I shouldn't have said it?"

"Yes, and if you retract what you've said, it will not be with me."

He exhaled as he leaned back and folded his armed. "I'd like to know why. Are you still mad at me for not dancing with you a while back? Or for getting on your case about Zach Newman?"

"I'm not mad…" _exactly…_ "…but…uh," _Gah! What to say? What to say?_ "Why did you say no to me at that dance?"

He played with a zipper on his bag…strange action for a guy who usually portrayed nothing less than superiority. "I don't like dancing with people I don't know."

I couldn't hold back a giggle. "Well then…if you can't meet someone at a dance, what is the purpose of them according to Will Grandison?"

"To check out girls. What else?" he smirked.

I blinked a couple times. _Well, it is a typical guy answer. _"So…none of us were attractive enough to override your qualms about dancing with strangers."

"Not that night."

I didn't trust myself to say anything rational just yet. I held my breath and counted to ten, but I never reached ten because Will was smiling at me.

"What?" I snapped.

"You were wearing that shirt."

I looked down at my shirt. _Guys aren't supposed to remember that kind of thing. _Well, it wasn't an inconspicuous shirt. If I wanted to blend in, I would definitely not wear it. It was a pink baby doll shirt. You know…the kind where the fabric gathers under the bra line and there's usually a ribbon that runs along that same line that ties in the back. "What's wrong with it?"

"It's pink and makes you look pregnant," he said still smiling.

An image of a pig popped in my mind. "Is that a nice way of saying it makes me look fat?"

"No, if the shirt made you look fat, I would have told you so."

"What's wrong with pink?" _You've worn pink._

His eyes glanced away from me as if he relied on a queue card. "It's not your best color."

I bit my lower lip. It was true. Pink didn't look good on me, and I was starting to come to terms with it. It's a hard fact to face for a girl who likes pink, and knows she shouldn't wear it in public. I could take the jokes and mockery from my roommates, but a guy? _What kind of guy says that to a girl?_ "So…my pink and pregnant look didn't make the best impression on you."

"I don't think it would make a good impression on any guy."

_Ouch. _

I stood up to fully assess myself, and as I turned my hip to look at my rear, I reassured myself that my jeans looked good, but they were probably the reason I looked pregnant and not fat. Well, this was all according to Will Grandison's opinion who was still openly staring at me with that same smile that hadn't left his face since the conversation started.

"What?" I said.

He kept his mouth shut as he tried not to laugh.

"What do you expect, Mr. Will Grandison? You just said that this shirt looks bad on me, and that it's the reason that you or any other guy wouldn't dance with me."

"Red, before I said anything about your shirt, I asked you out?"

_Oh, yeah. Hmmm._ I smiled. "But I said no."

"You said no," he sighed. "Apparently, I'm still paying for my first impression."

_More like your third through twentieth impressions._ I look down at myself, again. "How pregnant does it make me look?"

He rolled his eyes. "Self-conscious, are we?"

I glared at him. "If in fact other guys share your opinion, I'd like to know."

"Eight months," he said.

"It does not!"

From his sitting down position, he reached over and poked me in the stomach…deflating my shirt. From where his finger first touched the shirt to where it hit my stomach was about two inches. _Huh._

"Alright," he smirked. "Only six months." Then he stood up, flung his bag over his shoulder, and walked away.

_Gah! And then he leaves._

After a full day of class, tutoring, homework…not to mention falling flat on my face twice, forgetting a homework assignment, leaving my car lights on the entire day, asking a random guy to help me jump it, giving the said guy my phone number (_Eat that, Will. I did it in my pink maternity shirt._) and then nearly running him over as I backed out of my parking spot, I was impressed that I wasn't in tears.

I drove to Macy's, my local grocery store of choice, to buy food knowing that I was completely out. As I walked along the frozen dinner isle, I noticed a type of girl you don't see everyday. You generally don't call girls tall, dark and handsome…at least in this day and age. How about tall, dark, and divine? Probably not, but pick your favorite synonym for beautiful. That describes her…only she was also pregnant—quite pregnant. _I wonder if she thinks I look pregnant._

_Gah, Kerstin. Get over it. _

When I meet her eyes, she smiled at me and said, "Kerstin Ashby?"

I completely froze. _I think I would remember meeting her._

"I recognize you from your golf pictures online," she said. "I googled your name."

_Freaky. Very, very freaky._

As she held out her hand for me to shake, she said, "I'm Angela Perry, Will's sister."

"W-Will?" I said. "Will Grandison?"

"Yeah," she said slowly.

"Will has a sister?"

"Yeah, he has four." She giggled. "I guess he doesn't talk about us much."

"Four sisters?" _I should probably shake her outstretched hand now._

"Yep."

_And I thought he'd be an only child._

She smiled, "I've heard a lot about you."

"Y-you have?"

She nodded, "I think it's cute they call you Red."

"Um…thanks."

"I heard you asked Will to dance awhile back, and he said, 'no.' I hope he's sufficiently made up for it," she said. "I can't believe he did that…although it was a miracle Ian and Kyle got him to the dance in the first place. His last ex-girlfriend took dancing classes with him. He doesn't break out of nostalgic moods easily."

"His last ex-girlfriend?"

"I can't believe it's been a year since they broke up. It wasn't pretty, but it didn't help that it was his third ugly break up since he got back from the mission. For such a great guy, I don't understand why girls eat him up and spit him back out. He's sensitive, considerate, honest, loyal, smart, athletic, and, gah, even I can see I have a hot little brother."

_Well, he is hot, but…_I gazed at her feet.

"He saved Kyle from a similar situation," she continued. "Kyle basically loved this girl, but Will told me that she's had a different boy-toy since the beginning of high school. Kyle wanted to marry her, and Will told him to think again."

_He did WHAT?_ I'm glad I successfully clamped my mouth shut and bit my tongue. Who knows what would have come out of my mouth in front of Will's sister.

She misunderstood my silence. "I know," she said. "It's sad that some girls are like that."

_It's sadder when a bitter guy has nothing better to do than butt into other people's relationships._ "I hope he's careful when he passes judgment." I said.

She smiled, "He'd never think that of you, Red. From what I've heard about you, I was beginning to wonder if you were really human. You seem too perfect."

_Right. Sure. Whatever. _T'were my thoughts, but it was all I could do to keep my mouth from gaping.

"Well, I've got to go. Nate, my hubby, is probably wondering what's taking me so long." She smiled. "I'm glad I've finally meet you. Say hi to Will for me."

I managed a weak smile until she left the isle, and after giving her a good head start, I made my purchases and left the store.

I'm glad I got home safely. The only thoughts running through my head from the time Angela left me to when I opened the apartment door were, _Stupid Kyle…Evil Will_.

When I did open the apartment door, I was greeted with loud giggles and laughter. Katie and Jenna had apparently invited over apartment 14 of girls and apartment 4 of guys.

"Red, you'll never guess," Jenna cried. "The guys lost at Scattagories. We're making them watch all six episodes of Pride and Prejudice."

A couple of guys groaned.

"Oh, you'll like it," said Erin.

"You want to join us, Red?" asked Katie.

"No thanks," I said. "I'd rather watch something closer to reality. Not everyone gets her Darcy and eats him, too."

My comment shut up every mouth in the room. I believe you could've heard crickets curbing in the background. Then a couple of the girls and guys started giggling/snickering.

"Don't you mean cake?" Katie said.

"Uh…yeah," I said. _Whatever._ I quickly unloaded my groceries, changed into sweats, walked out the front door, and started running.

I ran to the dollar theater and watched two movies. I confess I didn't really pay attention to either of them. I couldn't stop thinking about evil Will and a possible plan of revenge, but the movies were too distracting to get a good plan going. I couldn't think past toilet paper, eggs, and tooth paste. _What am I…13?_

The second movie got out sometime after midnight. I hesitated for a second about running home so late by myself, but no…I didn't feel like calling, speaking, or facing anyone I knew.

I jogged across the parking lot toward 2230 N and then headed west. 2230 N was barren. Even the vacant, yet lite gas station at Freedom added to the ghost town atmosphere. When I reached the Freedom intersection, I heard a man call, "Did your car break down?" I turned toward the voice and saw a man jogging toward me from the gas station.

I stopped. "No, I'm just running. I don't live far from here."

There was nothing unusual about his appearance. He wore a polo, light jacket, and jeans. When my gaze reached his face, a pleasant smile greeted me. "It's late. Do you want a ride?" he asked. "I'm parked across the street."

I looked away from the gas station to a dark neighborhood and a couple parked cars. The guy was clean shaven and had a BYU approved hair cut. He looked like he was in his late 20s or early 30s, and he was good looking. His eyes had a sparkle about them. However, as he walked closer towards me, a line from a story I'd heard in my high school seminary years came to my head. I couldn't remember if the story happened to a police officer, detective, or just a random guy, but while this guy was with a group of men, he got a distinct impression to beware of the guy with smiling eyes. That impression saved his life.

When this particular sparkling-eyed stranger motioned for me to step ahead of him towards his car, every instinct and muscle in my body cried, "Run! Run! Run!"

I ran. While I pounded my way up the hill toward University Ave, I thought I heard the guy following me. I prayed that the light would turn green in time for me to run across without stopping, and as I weighed the pros and cons of jaywalking, luckily, the light did turn green.

Were the footsteps still behind me? Maybe. Maybe not. I was too freaked to trust my hearing, and I didn't dare look behind me.

My street drew near. I could either turn right to head to the apartment complex or go straight, up the hill to "the house." I force my legs up the hill because "the house" was closer, but as I approached "the house," I saw the lights of a white SUV turn off and Will Grandison walk toward the front door.

"Red?" He said.

_Oh, why did I choose this way?_

"What are you doing?" he said.

At that, I turned around and ran back down the hill.

"Red, stop!" Will cried.

I kept running, but I heard footsteps and the jingling of keys behind me. Will was running after me. I willed my body to move faster, but he was gaining on me.

"Red, this is stupid," he cried.

"Then stop and go home," I panted.

"You shouldn't be alone," he said and muttered other things under his breath.

Unfortunately, my frustration wouldn't quicken my stride. Will was now running next to me.

"Will you tell me what possessed you to run at this time of night?" he asked.

It's hard to ignore someone that's standing (well…running) right next to you, but I tried.

"Don't you know the risks of being alone?" he asked.

_Why isn't he breathless?_

I believe when exercising, there is good pain, and there is bad pain. I'd always wondered what my pain threshold was. Well, I learned it that night while sprinting next to Will. My limbs couldn't take it anymore, and I abruptly collapsed on the sidewalk about 100 yards from the apartment complex. While heaving for air on my hands and knees, I felt a hand on my back. "Are you alright?" Will asked.

"Just…give…me…a…couple of…seconds."

He did. He even waited until my breathing was steadier before saying, "Did you run from the dollar theater? Why'd you run to the 'house' and not your place?"

As he waited for me to answer, I guess he must have realized the moisture on my face wasn't just sweat. "What happened?" He asked.

_Maybe if I rub my eyes, he'll go away._

"Tell me," he urged.

"There was this guy…" I'd never seen a jaw set as tightly or shoulder and arm muscles flex as quickly as Will's did before me…probably beating his own record. I added quickly, "…nothing happened."

"Tell me," he said quieter…fiercer.

I swallowed. "He was walking toward me from that gas station where Freedom ends. He asked if my car broke down and offered me a ride."

"Did you say anything to him?"

"I told him I was just running and lived near."

He stood up and muttered, "That was smart," under his breath. He asked, "Did he follow you?"

"I don't think so."

"You don't think so? He either followed you or he didn't."

"I don't know. I thought I heard footsteps at first, but I didn't check."

"Did you notice cars following you?"

_Um…I didn't think about that._

His eyes were digging into me. "While I was running with you, two cars passed us from behind. Did you recognize either of them?"

I didn't even notice the cars passing us.

Will flipped open his cell phone.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Calling the police."

"Will, no," I said. "Nothing happened. Nothing probably would have happened. I might have imagined someone following me, and…I…I don't remember any cars that passed me or might have followed me. And no one's watching us now."

"I'm not calling 911, but I…" As he took a deep breath, his features relaxed, and his eyes softened. He said, "Red, I think you should report this to the police."

I didn't know why what he said affected me so, but my heart skipped a beat and my lower stomach knotted.

He squatted next to me. "Please."

"Okay," I mumbled.

He handed me the phone. It read, "Calling Police."

"You have the police in your phone?" I asked.

He shrugged as he muttered the scout's motto. "Be prepared."

As I talked to the lady who answered, Will sat down next to me. He didn't look at me as I repeated what happened, but his brow furrowed, his eyes narrowed, and his jaw clinched as I described the guy and gave my account with more detail than what I gave him. When I finished, the lady said that someone will be sent to check it out and give me a call.

After I closed the phone, I stood up and handed it to Will without facing him. More tears were falling, and I didn't want to draw attention to them. I walked as quickly as my tired, sore legs could handle while Will followed closely behind. Earlier, I was just scared of the dark or the unknown or whatever, but after repeating what happened to the lady over the phone, the reality of what could have happened hit me, especially if that the guy was…um…naughty. Sure, the guy most likely was a descent guy, but what if he wasn't and I didn't run…

By the time I reached the bottom of the stairs to our apartment, my tears were out of control. Will turned me around and held me. I let him. I wanted a hug. I had a very feminine need for a hug, and Emily and everyone else that I would have let hug me weren't around. Besides, I trusted Will. He may have been a jerk, but he was a dependable jerk. I was even breaths away from confiding in him about my bad day, meeting his sister, and what she said about Kyle and Emily, but he opened his mouth first.

"What if he was following you, Red. What if he was biding his time to catch up to you. What if he's…Gah, Red." He wasn't yelling. Obviously, he didn't need to since his mouth was inches from my ear, but his words were cutting me as thoroughly as if he was. "I had just pulled up. 'The house' was empty. What made you think…"

"Stop it, Will!" I cried pulling away. "I got it, okay. I was stupid. I could have been…anything could have happen, but I'm here…safe. You can go."

He stepped back, stunned, and then he groaned, "Why do I bother trying?"

I blinked a couple of times. "What are you talking about?"

"I guess I might as well spell it out for you. It's been apparent to everyone else, but you. Gah, Red! When you're attracted to someone, you care about them, and I've liked you since…well, I don't know when. But…do you know what? I have no idea why I like you! You don't think. You're stubborn about practical things that most people don't think twice about. On top of that, you hardly pay attention to what's going on around you. But I bet your imagination is as good as mine to think about what could have happened to you tonight." He turned as if leaving, but stopped. "And what you eat is disgusting."

_Where'd that come from?_

He looked me up and down. "It's amazing you still have a body like the one you do. You eat like you want to have a heart attack before your 30."

I whirled around and stomped up the stairs to my apartment. By the time I reached the top, I expected him to be gone, but he was still there and had more to say.

"I've told myself, 'no more redheads.' I've tried hard not to like you, but I…I think I…" He rolled his eyes, gritted his teeth, and ran a hand through his hair. "Gah, Red!" He run up the stairs three at a time, grabbed my arm and pulled me to him.

Before I caught another breath, his lips pounced on mine…rather aggressively. His arms clamped me to him as I pushed against him to no avail. When his lips finally backed off, I pushed away free and slapped him as hard as I could.

"What was that?" he cried covering his cheek.

"Something else to help you…stop liking me."

"But I…"

"Do you really think your kiss is supposed to erase what you just said about me? You called me fat and flaky."

"I did not say that."

"Well, that's what I heard," I cried.

He exhaled sharply. "I don't know anyone who's more easily offended than you."

"Easily offended, huh? Add that to your list of reasons why you shouldn't like me, but honestly, Will, I don't know anyone who wouldn't take offence to 'you eat like you want to die before you're 30' and 'you don't think'…among other things."

"I was being honest. I thought you might appreciate it."

"I do appreciate it. It helped me know how to react."

"I can think of several more mature ways you could have responded," he said touching his cheek.

"Are you saying that slapping is less mature than how you kissed me? Gah-lee! Can you be any more pigheaded? You are such a jerk! And you wonder why I turned you down earlier today?"

His laugh was hollow. "So you turned me down because I'm a pigheaded jerk. You could have told me that this morning."

"You think that's the only thing, Mr. Will Grandison? Oh no, sir. Do you honestly think I'd ever date a guy who broke my best friend's heart?" Of course, I didn't learn about it until after he had asked me out, but he didn't need to know that. "Why'd you tell Kyle about how Emily was in high school? Yeah, she was a little boy crazy and…unreliable, but can't people change, Will? I've been around her for the last four and a half years. You haven't. She's not like that anymore."

"Kyle asked me what she was like, and I answered. I didn't force him to do anything."

"And your influence means nothing to him?"

"I didn't want to see him get hurt. She'll get over it."

"True. Eventually, she will. Maybe last night was the first night she didn't cry herself to sleep. I can't tell you for sure because I wasn't with her. She went home," I said with tears threatening to flow again. "How could you, Will? She loved him. She would have married him if he asked, and for some reason…she loves him still."

His Adam's apple bobbed up and down as he glared in the direction of the parking lot.

"Now," I said. "Tell me about you and Cooper McCoy."

"Tell you about me and McCoy?" Will let out another mirthless laugh. "It's…"

"I know. I know. It's none of my business," I interrupted. "But really, Will, whatever happened between you and Cooper and what's-her-name and any other girl that dumped you makes you unbearable to be around. Yeah, I'm sure whatever happened might have been comparable to 9/11 for you, but I think it's time to move on."

"For your information, what you've seen go on between McCoy and me has very little to do with the fight we had last year."

"Well, tell me what I'm missing then. I'd like to know why seeing Cooper causes you to morph into the incredible hulk."

He smirked and shook his head. "I'll let you figure that one out…assuming you'll decide to spare the time and have the attention span long enough to think about it."

Suppressing the urge to slap him again, I said, "I don't understand why Ian and Kyle hang around you. Are you capable of saying anything remotely nice? Gah! I know I have my faults, Will, and yeah, I could be a little more proactive about changing, but what right do you have to shove them in my face? What valiant thing did I do in the pre-existence to deserve the biggest jerk on the planet critiquing and criticizing my every move?"

"Yeah, I'm sent here to terrorize you." His smirk had changed into a shallow grin. "If your eyes had been open for the last month or so, you would have caught the motivation behind my madness, but like you said, that's one of your faults you haven't been working on. Though I guess understanding me really doesn't matter now, does it."

"No, it doesn't," I said though gritted teeth. "Well, I'm sure you'll be successful in life. I hear not every prick makes it to the top, but you're smart. I'm sure you know when to turn on and off the rear kissing required to make it in business."

"Thanks. Your confidence in me is flattering." He gave a short, mocking bow. "Believe it or not, I do understand your feelings. I don't know why I let my own get out of hand, but I promise it won't happen again." Then he left.

I stared at his backside as he walked away. When he turned the corner out of sight, I heard the clip clop of his shoes dramatically quicken. He had to be running. I blankly stared at my hands as I unlocked the front door and slowly turned the doorknob.

_W-what just happened?_


	15. Chapter 14

Author's note: General Conference is held twice a year, in April and in October. It's where the world wide leaders of the LDS Church talk to everyone. Four hours are on Saturday with a special broadcast in the evening for the Priesthood (boys and men 12+) in the evening, and there's four more hours of general conference on Sunday.  FYI:  The women have their own session the week before (Young Women 12-18 years old in the spring and the Relief Society in the fall).

Chapter 14

When I stepped through the front door, I was greeted by ten blank faces…apartment 14, apartment 4, Jenna, and Katie. The TV was off. The sixth video to Pride and Prejudice that was rewinding popped out of the VCR. Being the closest, I took it out of the machine and slide it back into its cover.

Could they hear Will and me fighting outside the door? Yes…if the awkward silence meant anything, and from watching their bodies shift uncomfortably under my gaze, I had no doubt they heard more than I would have wanted them to.

As I closed my eyes and rubbed my forehead, I wished a time warp would swallow me whole. A black hole would have been nice, but alas...

_Can life get any worse?_

I took a deep breath and looked at the clock on the VCR. 1:16 AM. _If anyone's going to say the first word, it might as well be me._ "It's passed curfew."

Everyone glanced briefly at one another before standing, and while they stretched and walked toward the door, I went to my room for a brief refuge. As soon as I shut my door, the front room was no longer silent. There was laughing when a couple of the guys admitted the movie was better than they thought it would be while the other two said it was worse. I took off my shoes and changed from sweats to pajama bottoms. When I opened my bedroom door, the front room quieted, and everyone except Katie and Jenna promptly filed out of the apartment.

Acting like preschoolers needing to pee, Jenna and Katie could barely contain their inquiries about what happened between Will and me, but at the same time, they didn't know where to start.

Taking advantage of the calm before the storm of questions and giggles, I quickly bade them goodnight, did my nightly ritual in the bathroom, grabbed the cordless phone, and barricaded myself in my room.

While trying desperately to keep my mind off of Will, the sparkly-eyed stranger, and the 10 people who heard Will and me fight, I waited for the police to call (as the lady said they would). I hummed primary songs. I found some white paper and some colorful scrapbooking pens and began drawing rainbows, suns, hearts, peace signs, and flowers…happy things. The piece of paper resembled what my folders and notebooks looked like in middle school. I smiled at the memory, but when I noticed one of the hearts looked like lips that were trying to kiss a flower, who didn't want to be kissed, I crumpled up the paper, ripped it a couple of times, and dove onto my bed.

Finally, the phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Am I speaking with Kerstin Ashby?"

I was momentarily stunned from hearing my name pronounced correctly. _Well, the lady must have spelled it phonetically. _"Yeah. This is she."

"This is Officer Ricks with the Provo Police Department. I'm following up on a report you called in about an hour ago. You said you saw a suspicious man at Freedom and 2230 North around 12:15 AM. Am I correct?"

"Yes, sir," I said feeling rather embarrassed that I called in the first place. "Nothing happened, though. I think I just got jumpy and ran away from the guy."

"Would you mind describing him again for me?"

As I spoke, I pictured him in my room (scary thought)…everything from his build and hair to his pleasant smile and casual walk.

When I finished, Officer Ricks said, "Was there anything about him that made you run? or a way he said something?"

"Not really. Well…I guess it was his eyes." I tried not to laugh at myself. "There wasn't anything scary about them. They sort of sparkled with his smile."

"That made you nervous?"

Yeah, I felt like a dork. "Well, not specifically speaking, but when I looked at them, I remember a line from a story, 'beware of the guy with the smiling eyes." That's when I panicked and ran."

There was a brief pause over the phone before I heard him cough and clear his throat. He then asked, "Have you been on BYU campus lately?"

"Um…yeah. I'm a student."

"Have you seen police notices around of a sexual assault that occurred Tuesday night?"

"Uh…n-no, sir."

Instead of asking another question or saying something about it, he went ahead and read the notice over the phone. The assault happened on the south side of campus around 1:00 in the morning. What was a girl doing on campus at 1 in the morning? Who knows, but then again, what was I doing running from the dollar theater after midnight?

The stuff after that was bluh, bluh, bluh in my ears until he started reading the description of the person who committed the crime. My throat dried up, and my left leg twitched…because the guy in the notice and the guy I had just seen a little over an hour ago seemed to be one and the same. When he finished reading, he said, "Do you understand why I'm bringing this to your attention?"

"Y-yes, sir,"

He took a deep breath. "It's true that nothing happened to you, and the matching descriptions could be a coincidence. But it's a coincidence we shouldn't ignore. We don't know what would have happened if you chose not to run." He paused to cough. "But I've checked out the gas station and the surrounding area. I've also driven and scoped out the route you ran. I saw nothing suspicious or worth investigating, but I'd like you to call in and report if you ever see him again."

"Yeah…um…thank you."

"And I'd like you to take some advice. Don't run alone at night. I don't hear many reports like yours that end with nothing happening."

I could only swallow in response.

"Have a goodnight."

"You too."

I remember pressing 'end' on the phone, but I'm not sure what happened to the phone after that. I sank quickly and effortlessly into a dreamless sleep as if bewitched or drugged like in a fairy tale.

On Saturday morning, Jenna and Katie ran off to the ward pre-conference breakfast kickoff and went to watch the morning session at apartment 14. Of course, they didn't leave without spending twenty minutes or so pestering me into talking to them about the fight between Will and me. I told them over and over that I wasn't ready to talk about it. I practically kicked them out the front door to get to the ward breakfast. Above all, I wanted to be alone, but was it really healthy for me to be left alone with my thoughts? You tell me.

Interestingly enough, of all the events of the night before, running into a suspicious sparkly-eyed stranger was the easiest to get over. Why? Thinking about the description that the policeman read over the phone…after a good night's sleep, I concluded that it was too vague. Honestly, how many guys at BYU have short, light brown hair, clean shaven faces, of medium height and lean builds wearing polo shirts and jeans? Answer: about 2 out of 3 guys. Heck, the description matched my brother who lived in Fresno, California with his wife and two children. I cannot deny that running into the stranger was scary, and yeah, it was stupid for me to run home alone. But…Cheese! Nothing happened!

However, every time I thought of Will, _Gah!._ On the one hand, I seethed as I remembered every word that came out of his mouth. On the other hand, I cringed as I remember the words that came out of my own mouth, and I felt guilty that I had tried my hardest to cut his pride to bits.

My guilty conscious ultimately outweighed my anger at Will. I have general conference to blame for that. I couldn't remember specifically what each talk was about, but every reference to love, compassion, brotherly kindness, service, repentance, forgiveness, and following the example of Christ stung my conscious like paper cuts.

One talk in particular lead me to wonder how Christ would have reacted to Will. From what I knew about Christ, He wouldn't have gotten mad or talked back at him. Christ would have endured the harsh words. Moreover, He said to "love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you." Obviously, I didn't feel Will was despitefully using me, persecuting me, or hating me…exactly, but wasn't that all the more reason for me to love and respect Will as another child of God despite what he said?

Well, I should be honest with you. An overwhelming change of heart toward Will didn't happen during conference. I just wanted the embarrassment, anger, regret, guilt, resentment, and every other tormenting feeling to leave, and from listening to conference, I grudgingly knew I had to do two things to feel completely at peace again. One, I needed to apologize to Will. Two, I needed to forgive him. Why? It's what He would do and what He'd like me to do.

For the rest of the day, I walked and talked like a Zombie. Fortunately, Jenna and Katie were too occupied to bother me any more about last night, but the atmosphere in the apartment became awkward when the guys of apartment 4 and the girls of apartment 14 came over for ice cream after the Priesthood session of conference.

Trying to break the ice, I said to the guys, "How was the Priesthood session? My grandma says it's either about how fine you guys are doing or telling you to stop staring at your secretaries. Which was it?"

The guys and girls laughed nervously for a bit, probably not knowing how to respond. One guy finally said, "A little bit of both. I guess."

Then a knock came to the door. I froze in place wondering if it would be either Will, the police, or the sparkly-eyed stranger. Frankly, I didn't know which one would be worse. Luckily, it was Ian.

His booming laugh filled the apartment before he did. "This is quite the party. Why wasn't I invited?"

The girls giggled and offered him ice cream.

"No thanks," he smiled. "I'm here to see Red."

The room went dead silent until Ian couldn't hold back laughter anymore.

"Come on, guys," Ian smirked. "What's wrong with me seeing Red? It's not like she's going to bite my head off."

Some of the guys and girls started laughing quietly while I dreaded Ian's next words.

"I'm safe talking to her as long as I don't turn into Will Grandison," he said.

Completely ignoring everyone and everything else in the room, I rushed toward him, pushed him out of the doorway, and shut the door. Although I was too mad to say anything yet, I imagined digging out his eyes and cutting off his ears with my glare…all the while Ian was trying to keep from laughing again.

He said, "For two people who have problems communicating, you and Will sure look alike when you're ticked."

_A similarity between Will and me?_ "I think I _will _bite your head off," I snapped.

"Easy, woman," he said. "I'm a neutral party."

"Who's living with the enemy?" I cried. Um…yeah, I was on the right track toward forgiveness. Gah!

"Shouldn't we talk softer, Red?" Ian smirked pointing to my apartment door.

I grabbed Ian's arm and marched him to the parking lot. When we reached my car, I whirled around. "What do you know about last night?"

"Not much."

"Then what makes you think I'd bit your head off if you turned into Will?"

"Suspicions, my dear Red. Suspicions. Here's what I know. I come home and find Will doing sit-ups upside down against the wall hanging from his pull-up bar…the one he has in his room. Crazy, I know, but the psycho likes to inflict pain on himself when he's upset. So I ask him what's up. He doesn't say anything. A litter later, I find Kyle and Will standing in the middle of the kitchen saying nothing. I don't think anything of it until I see Kyle's face. He's ticked, Red. I mean…I have never seen Kyle so ticked in my life. Granted I've only known him for a little while, but…" Ian blew out some air and laughed.

I gasped, "He told him."

"What was that?"

"N-nothing. Go on."

"Well, I asked Kyle who messed up his kitchen, but he didn't say anything. So after that I looked at Will." Ian laughed harder. "It must have been my first good look at his face. I didn't notice earlier he had a red hand print on it."

I gasped again.

"I asked him where he got such a lovely mark," Ian continued with a smile. "He said it was from you."

"He said that?" I asked breathlessly.

"Yeah, but I couldn't get the story out of him because Kyle announced that they were leaving for Vegas. Then they both grabbed some stuff from their rooms and went out the door. They didn't even invite me to come with them," Ian pouted.

"He didn't," I said in a small voice.

Ian enjoyed my reaction. "I'm assuming that this 2 AM excursion had something to do with the slap you gave Will. So I've asked myself what do you, Will, Kyle, and Vegas have in common."

"He didn't," I said again…dazed. I knew that Kyle didn't have a car, but…"Why didn't Kyle just call her?"

"So it is Emly, is it." Ian smiled.

"Yeah, but why wouldn't he call first? How does he know Emily wants to see him?" Who was I kidding? I knew Emily would meet Kyle with open arms sort of like welcoming a prodigal son…or prodigal boyfriend as it were. But still… "Isn't Kyle acting a bit rash?"

"Groveling at one's feet adds more credibility to an apology than simply using up phone minutes. Don't you think?"

"Yeah." I sighed and leaned back on my car. "Well…I guess…he must still like her."

Ian laughed. "You think?"

"Well, it's been hard to tell," I snapped. "He's given her the silent treatment for how long? And that's all because Will had to butt in and tell Kyle stuff about Emily that wasn't even true."

"Whoa there, Red. Will had his reasons."

"I don't consider bitterness and not getting over past relationships good enough reasons."

Ian shook his head. "You're missing the mark, Red. Will saw Emily several times being uh…friendly with other guys. Kyle saw it, too. Then one conclusion led to another, and…well, don't get the idea that Kyle was brainwashed into breaking up with her."

"That doesn't explain why he didn't ask to her about it. Emily doesn't see it herself. She's nice and 'friendly' with everyone. That's just how she is. An angel. She doesn't even notice that guys are falling right and left for her as she's doing. Why didn't Kyle just talk to her?"

"That's what he's doing now."

"A little late."

"Yeah, but that's why he's down in Vegas and not here calling."

I took a deep breath. "You knew that Emily wasn't just playing with Kyle, right?"

He scratched the back of his neck. "Well, yeah…but…"

"Why didn't you then tell him? I'm sure you had a chance."

"Hey, I put my two cents in, but that's how much my advice is usually worth. Two cents."

"Because of Will," I cried. "Gah, it's all his fault."

Ian laughed. "Why do I have the feeling you'd blame Will for your stubbed toes, too?"

"Well, it is Will's fault. He's bitter, jealous, thinks he's always right and…"

"He's not bitter...per say. Just cautious. "

"Cautious? Being cautious doesn't make you blind," I said.

"Red, if he didn't know he was wrong, he wouldn't have driven Kyle to Vegas."

_True…I guess._ I folded my arms and glowered.

Ian studied me for a moment. "Are you going to tell me about what happened last night between you and Will?"

"Maybe in thirty years." _Or you'll find out from my roommates and the rest of our FHE group. Gah!_

His countenance sobered a bit. He even appeared concerned. "You sure you don't want to talk about it?"

"No. I mean yeah…I'm sure." I smiled weakly. "Thanks, though."

"Alright," he said. "How about a hug?"

I didn't take an extra second to think about it. I threw my arms around him, and he lifted me for a back cracking bear hug.

While still holding me, he said, "I'm sorry Will hurt you."

I stiffened, and he set me down.

"How do you…why do you…I slapped him, remember?" I said.

"Will called me."

"But you said he didn't say…"

"He didn't tell me anything. He just asked me to see how you were doing. That's it. Then he hung up."

My mouth froze in an O-shape. I took several seconds for me to speak let alone think again. "If you came because Will told you to, it doesn't make you a neutral party."

"Sure it does," he smirked. "I'm the middle man, the mediator. Besides, I would have come anyway. I wanted to look at the girl who slapped Will Grandison, the mastermind, James Bond in the flesh, Batman, the haus from…"

"Whatever," I said. "I'm sure those guys knew how to treat women."

"Honestly, I think it's just you, Red," he said. "He practically gave up on dating. Had no desire whatsoever, and he basically swore he wasn't going to date redheads for the rest of his life, but then you came along."

"Me?"

"Bathsheba."

"Bathsheba?"

"The devil in a red dress."

"I guess that sort of explains why he glares at me like I'm some mutant insect and then asks me out randomly and expects me to say yes."

Ian laughed. "Is that what last night was about?"

"No," I said quickly. "I wouldn't slap him for that."

"What did you slap him for?"

"None of your business."

Ian didn't press me anymore about it. For which I was grateful, but from seeing his eyebrows turned inward and his mouth in a pout I feared that he might be thinking…trying to figure it out.

We were walking back to my apartment. When we got to the front door, Ian put his hand on the doorknob, started turning it, but stopped as if the doorknob had burned him. Then he abruptly started laughing and hit his forehead against the front door.

"What's so funny?"

"He completely lost it and kissed you, didn't he."

_HO GEE CRAP!_

The door opened, and Ian stepped in leaving me petrified on the door step.

"Finally," Katie cried. "You're back."

"Ready for ice cream," Ian said. "If any's left."

"Of course there is," she said and then leaned closer to Ian. "Why isn't Red moving? Why is her mouth hanging open?"

Ian laughed and pulled me in…jump starting the blood circulation in my legs and most importantly to my brain. I then realized that I blew my opportunity to verbally deny that Will kissed me. Silence was the next best thing…so I thought. I stayed in the main room with everyone…forcing out polite conversation and laughs and being aware that Ian was always watching, smiling, knowing. I kept my distance from him until he left. Standing in the open doorway, he met my gaze, clicked his heals and saluted me in a mock military fashion from across the room.

Amidst the giggles and whispers, I walked toward Ian and hissed, "What was that for?"

"Respect, ma'am," Ian whispered in a bad English accent. "I never thought I'd have the privilege…nay the honor of personally knowing the future Mrs. William T. Grandison."

"What!" I screamed.

Ian laughed and shut the door between us.

After giving myself plenty of time to calm down, I called Emily. Kyle was with her, so we didn't talk long. I was happy to notice her voice had the familiar sing-songy tone to it, something I had missed over the last couple weeks. She was finally herself again and happy. There was no denying it. Yeah, I was happy for her, but I wished that her happiness wasn't the product of me yelling at Will, who then told Kyle, who was then driven to Emily by Will. If I were Emily, I'd wish that Kyle himself realized the stupidity of not talking to me in the first place and had been man enough to act on it without Will's blessing. But I wasn't Emily. And she was happy.

In the early, early hours of Monday morning, I heard the front door open and close. Freaked, I covered myself with the covers. When I heard my bedroom door open, I prayed for deliverance. Then a body jumped on top of me, and I screamed.

The body shook with laughter. "Have a cow, Red."

"Emily, get off me!" I took the covers from over my head and looked at the clock. 2:21. "Gah! Did you guys just get back?"

"Yeah," Emily giggled and hiccupped.

"Are you drunk?"

"On life. I'm engaged!"

"What?"

"I'm getting married." She began laughing uncontrollably.

"What?"

"Yep, he loves me. He's taking me to look at rings tomorrow."

"But you guys haven't been speaking for a couple weeks."

"It was all a misunderstanding. We've sorted it out. He loves me. I love him. He's the one I want forever. We're getting married."

_Cheese!_ "Well, I'm happy for you, but…are you sure? Shouldn't you wait?"

"Red, you've said it yourself. When you know, you know."

"Yeah, but…"

Her glowing eyes, just inches away, held mine. "Trust me," she whispered. "We know what we're doing."

"Okay, I will." I was still somewhat apprehensive, but her joy and faith in the matter was contagious. I couldn't help smiling. "Congratulations." But my smile faltered as I asked, "Did Will drive you guys home?"

"No, we went with the people I drove down with on Thursday. Will's staying another day." A facetious smile covered her face. "So…you ready to talk about the reasons why I think Will likes you?"

I grunted, "No."

"Well, then…I guess I need to wait to talk to you why I think you subconsciously like Will."

I abruptly rolled over in my bed pushing Emily to the floor. She only laughed.

I had trouble getting back to sleep. I blamed my thoughts…and Emily and Ian for provoking them. _Why the heck would she think that I like Will? AND WHY THE HECK WOULD I MARRY THE MAN?_ _Yeah, he's hot. Yeah, he transforms into this fabulously articulate, considerate, patient, energetic, dang hot Sunday School teacher, but that isn't really him. Who would like a guy who's just plain mean to her? It doesn't make sense._ Then remembering what he said and I said on Friday night, the regret, embarrassment, depression, anger, remorse, etc. flooded in full force, causing indigestion, heartburn and a vile taste to pop in my mouth. I gave up trying to sleep two full hours before my alarm when off.

After taking my time showering/shaving, putting on lotion, dressing, doing my hair, applying makeup, and…hey…I even got through my scripture reading for the day, I still had an hour before my Monday morning tutoring session. Thinking about my tutees (two football players), I decided it was time I did something nice for them. Monday morning was the only time we could meet, and they'd never stood me up. I didn't feel like baking anything, but simply buying donuts wouldn't do. My conscious couldn't handle feeding people something that only added two or three days' worth of saturated fat in one sitting without something else to go with it, so I headed to Macy's.

As I drove into the grocery stores parking lot, I panicked when I spotted a white SUV that looked like Will's. I paused before getting out of the car to take a deep breath and reassure myself that it couldn't possibly be his car. He was still in Vegas.

In the store, I grabbed some precut fruit, donuts, and starburst jellybeans (for me) and headed to the front of the store. At the single open register, the cashier and an old lady were talking…which was fine, but _shouldn't the old lady be paying or signing or doing something besides just talking?_

"Ah, here he comes," the old lady announced.

After I turned in the direction she was looking, I stopped breathing and dropped everything that I was holding. Obviously, nothing happened to starburst jelly beans, and fortunately, the donuts stayed in the box. The fruit, however, wasn't so lucky. It was sprawled all over the floor. Before my brain could send a message to my legs to squat down, Will Grandison had already picked up the donuts and candy and was holding them out for me to take. I didn't take them from him just yet. I wanted to pick up the fruit…to do something about the mess I'd made, but Will said quickly, "Don't worry about it. Someone will take care of it."

"Thank you," I mumbled while taking my stuff out of his hands…avoiding eye contact.

"Is this what you were talking about?" Will asked the old lady while handing her a jar of what looked like jelly.

"Yes, dear. Perfect," she said. "I can't believe I didn't have you grab it while we were over there."

At this point, my brain had finally kicked in full throttle, and I rushed to the produce section to pick up another container of fruit. Happily, by the time I got back to the register, Will and the old lady were gone.

"Credit or Debit," asked the cashier after scanning my stuff.

"Credit," I said while swiping my card, but the card didn't work. I looked at the cashier. She was flirting with a guy in line behind me. I tried the card again. Still didn't work.

"Flip it around," suggested the cashier.

I did so, but this time it wouldn't accept my card.

My pulse was beating on base drums in my ears. _What?_

I tried it again. Same thing.

By now, I had the cashier's complete attention. "Do you have any other way to pay?"

I looked threw my wallet. There was my debit card, but I only had enough money in my checking account to cover my rent check, not yet debited. I had no cash on me either. _Gah!_ Lamely, I tried swiping the card again.

"Um…Red," said Will Grandison's voice which I wished was anywhere else in the world, but next to me. "That's your BYU id."

_Oh._

"Nice try," The cashier giggled. "It'd be nice if meal plans worked here."

I didn't laugh. I didn't dare look up, but dug through my wallet…looking for my stupid credit card. When I finally found it and went to swipe it, Will Grandison had already swiped his and was signing the receipt.

"You didn't need to do that," I said faintly. I quickly grabbed the bag and donut box to rush out the door, but the wheel of the grocery cart behind me caught the heel of my shoe. I stumbled forward while trying to regain my balance with the box and bag still in my hands. Luckily, I didn't fall down, but it was Will who kept me from falling. My embarrassment exceeded its breaking point. I was nanoseconds away from either crying or laughing hysterically. Fortunately, a jovial delirium engulfed me, and I laughed as I put back on my shoe. The cashier laughed as well, and when I meet the eyes of the guy behind me, he said with a hesitant smile, "Are you okay?"

_I've gone completely mad, but…_ "I'm fine," I said giggling. "Thanks."

"Sorry about that," he said.

"It's alright," I said. "You guys have a good morning."

"You, too," the guy said.

The giggly cashier only nodded.

Knowing I had to do it sooner or later, I faced Will. "Hey, thanks for…" my voice faltered as my face burnt at the sight of him. His short, thick hair wasn't tamed by gel, and his face hadn't seen a razor for a while. He wore basketball shorts and a jacket over a plan white shirt. I didn't have the thinking capacity to wonder why his haggard, rugged look sent my stomach plummeting. Only one word filled my mind. _Delicious._

I forced myself to dismiss the immature thought, and I chastised myself until his lips parted slightly. The memory of his kiss hit me like a freight train. I began wondering if it was normal for girls my age to experience hot flashes.

He cleared his throat. "No problem."

I gave my best polite smile and walked past him out the door, but I didn't get far because it had started raining hard. _Cheese!_

"Wait right there," Will said, and against instinct I did.

I stood rooted as I watched him run to his car and pull an umbrella out of the back. When he came back to me, he opened it over my head.

_He's not going to walk me to my car, is he? _"You don't need to do this," I said.

"Yes, I do," he said gently, but not without conviction.

I couldn't speak or move.

Still holding up the umbrella, he took a deep breath and closed his eyes briefly. "Please, let me do this."

_Why are you being nice to me? I'm not ready to forgive you! I'm not even ready to apologize! Why can't you still be in Vegas? _"No," I cried.

He bit his lower lip as he nodded and closed the umbrella. "I understand."

Watching him walk to his car in a down pour with his head down, one hand in his jacket pocket and the other tapping his side with the umbrella uprooted my guilty conscious. My gut told me he had the wrong idea about why I didn't want his kindness.

I ran after him. "Will, wait!"

His body jerked around at the sound of my voice, and I noted how hot he looked wet. _You silly, silly, silly, stupid girl._

"I-I'm sorry. Oh, cheese!  Not about the..." _Gah!_ "I'm not ready to…" _You're supposed to be in Vegas!_

I stared at his face hoping he'd reveal some emotion, but his face expressed nothing. The only thing I knew for sure was that he was wet…very wet. His apparent numbness to the rain had to mean something, right?

"Well," I giggled nervously. _Can I make this any more awkward? _"I guess I'll see you tonight at FHE. Bye." Then I made a mad dash for my car with the drenched box of donuts and dripping bag of fruit and starburst jellybeans in hand.


	16. Chapter 15

A/N: This chapter picks up at the end of last chapter. Thanks for reading this story! And thank you for your reviews!

Chapter 15

I was impressed that the box kept the donuts relatively safe. Good thing dropping the donuts did more damage than the rain did. People are used to seeing the smeared icing on the lid, not wet donuts. The two football players, Mike and Rex, were appreciative, but as they thanked me, I tried not to cringe. I didn't buy the food. Will did.

When the tutoring session was practically over, I stood up to stretch and met the smiley gaze of the tall, dark and handsome player.

"What's up, McCoy!" Rex cried. "Don't usually see you here this early."

"It's crunch time. Classes end next week," Cooper said from across the room making his way toward us. He was smiling broadly until Mike turned around. They cordially acknowledged each other's existence with a nod. _Weird._

"Don't remind me," Rex groaned. "I've a 20 page paper due the last day of class on a 500 page book I haven't read."

"You haven't read it yet," Mike said. "We've had all semester!"

"Yeah," Rex sighed. "I'm screwed."

"Well, I can't say I envy you," Cooper said slamming a hand on his shoulder. "What's up, Red?"

"Not much." _A little peeved that you stood me up on Friday after confirming you'd be there, but…_ "Would you like a donut?"

"Thanks." He grabbed a donut. "Sorry about last Friday. Something came up."

_At 7:45 in the morning?_ "It's alright. Call me if you need a tutor for this Friday."

"Sure. See ya guys around."

I nodded while Rex said, "Alright, Man. See ya." Mike just stared at him as he walked off.

The three of us were silent for bit until Rex hit Mike in the shoulder. "What's up with you, man?"

"Nothing," Mike insisted.

"Dude, I thought you were over it."

Mike smirked. "I am, but there's something else in the way now."

Confusion crossed Rex's brow. "Something else? How can there…wait a second," Rex smiled as a light bulb turned on. "You asked her. You finally asked her, didn't you?"

"I did."

"Poor McCoy."

"He had his chance."

"What are you guys talking about?" I asked.

"Mike's engaged," Rex said.

"Congratulations."

"Thanks," Mike smiled.

"To McCoy's ex-fiancé," Rex added.

"What?" I cried and then lowered my voice. "He was engaged?"

"You wouldn't think it possible with McCoy." Rex smiled. "But I bet you can guess how it ended."

"Rex…um…" Mike started, but Rex continued.

"He cheated on her with her brother's girlfriend."

_Oooh._ _Cheese. _I looked between Rex's smile and Mike's grimace. "When did this happen?"

"Has it been a year yet?"

"Since the party at Laird's place?" Mike said.

"Yeah."

"It was on Memorial day."

"Ian Laird?" I asked.

They both nodded.

_Huh. _"What happened?"

Rex looked at Mike for what looked like permission. Upon getting a "whatever" shrug from him, Rex began the story. "McCoy and Laura's…that's her name, Laura. Anyway, McCoy and her brother were talking in…where'd they serve their mission again? Switzerland?"

"Sweden," Mike said.

I swallowed. _What are the odds that…_

"Right," Rex said. "They were talking in Swedish. Then, randomly, they started arguing. Nobody knew what they were saying, and then, out of nowhere, Laura's brother…what's his name again?"

"Will."

I gasped. Mike glanced at me for a second, but Rex didn't notice…probably thought I hiccupped.

"Will throws a left jab and right hook…breaking McCoy's jaw," Rex said. "All of us are like 'What?' And Laura's freaking out while Will's girlfriend…what was her name?"

Mike shrugged.

"Will's girlfriend wasn't saying anything. I think she knew what was up. Will tells Laura that McCoy's been cheating on her. Then she goes into shock, and…well, it was a party worthy for Jerry Springer."

Obviously, Rex told the story for its shocking entertainment value. To say that they were bemused at my response would be an understatement since they must have assumed my shock would only be at the expository and forget-about-it level…not a mute, "is it just me or is it hot in here" and then pass out level. Yeah, I think I was overreacting, but hey, it's not often you find out that you've misjudged a guy after despising, rebuking, and slapping him. And well, I had never despised, rebuked, and slapped anyone before I'd met Will.

"Are you okay?" Mike said…a little concerned.

I nodded and took a few deep breaths. "So…you guys think Cooper still likes her?"

While Mike shrugged, Rex said, "Tried to redeem himself, but that's when Mike stepped in and swept her off her feet."

Mike didn't try hiding a smug smile.

"No offence, Mike, but it seems like he didn't try very hard. Making out with a new girl every week wouldn't win any girl's heart back," I said.

"Oh, he didn't start that until he gave up," Rex laughed. "Every guy has his own way of rebounding."

_Cheese._ I longed to know more, but the conversation abruptly ended when we realized what time it was. Before leaving the third floor of the Student Athlete building, I walked pass some study rooms on my way to say hi to Al, my old academic advisor. One room in particular grabbed my attention. The occupants, Cooper and some girl (probably a volleyball player judging from her build), were in a steamy embrace.

_You're right, Cooper. Crunch time. Better get busy, huh._ I rolled my eyes and walked on.

* * *

Even after cutting out and baking over 12 dozen spring themed sugar cookies (taking advantage of "the house's" double oven), Will still hadn't shown up for FHE. I felt all the more stupid for expecting to see him. _Why should he come anyway? He knows I'm here._ Buthe'd never missed an FHE before. In fact, none of the guys of 'the house' missed an FHE (when they were in town anyway) since he moved in. _Huh._

It wasn't until the six giggly sophomore girls, Kyle, Emily, and I started frosting the cookies while keeping Ian from eating every cookie I frosted and listening to the twin baseball players, Jason and James, talk about their month of traveling that Will walked in…still unshaven and unkept. Our eyes met. I hated how my lower stomach sank and fluttered. I lowered my eyes and put way more focus and concentration into frosting a cookie than what one may consider humanly normal and sane.

"Red," Ian said. "Why are you blushing?"

Without any sudden movement, I pressed my foot on his big toe with as much pressure as I could, but he only laughed, initiating whispers and quiet giggles amongst the girls. I looked up in time to see Will turn around to leave the kitchen, but he stopped when Kyle cried, "Hey, Will. I thought you weren't getting home until late tonight."

"I remembered some things I needed to do and drove up this morning."

"Gee, man. You look like you haven't slept in days," Jason said.

Kyle laughed. "What time did you leave this morning?"

"Early," Will said. "What are all the cookies for?"

"The neighbors."

Will cleared his throat and scratched under his neck. "Around here?"

"Yeah."

"Oh." Then he left the kitchen and hike up the stairs.

As a group we decided that the neighbors would be overwhelmed if all 12 of us showed up at their door to deliver cookies especially since we weren't Christmas caroling. We split up. I went with Kyle and Emily, and the other guys had a couple girls with them except for Will (who had shaved and changed). He tagged along with Ian's group, but hung in the back as they approached doors. I knew because I watched him even from a distance. Emily had to bring my focus back when the doors were answered.

When the fourth door we knocked at opened, I involuntarily let out a shriek and jumped back…subsequently startling the little old lady who answered the door, the same old lady whom Will had helped at the grocery store that morning.

"Oh my! Are you alright?" she said touching my arm. "Did you see a mouse? A young man helped me set up traps inside today. We've caught three already. Must have coaxed the rest of the little buggers outside."

"No. I uh…no mouse. I-I'm fine. Perfectly fine. Um…how are you?"

Emily threw me a concerned look before putting on a sweet smile. "Our FHE group made some cookies for the neighbors tonight."

"Oh, how sweet of you, dear," she gushed. "Do you live in one of the houses around here or in an apartment building near by?"

After Emily explained us girls, Kyle said. "I live in that house with the white SUV parked in front."

"Why, that's William's car! That's where William lives! You know William Grandison?"

While Kyle cried, "Yeah," I hesitantly glanced at Emily who was giving me a "we're going to have a nice long chat after this" look.

"Did you know that I taught his father high school Math right here in Provo?"

The three of us shook our heads.

"Richard was such a dear boy," she gushed. "His son is just like him. He's the one who helped me catch the mice today. And the dear boy's been helping me with my grocery shopping. I'm not as tall as I used to be." She laughed until she gasped, "Oh! Wait one minute!" A minute later she came back with the same plate we'd given her, but with different cookies on it. "I baked these for him earlier today. Would you mind giving them to him for me? I'm sure he'll share." She winked and laughed.

I can't tell you much about the last two houses we went to. I wasn't mentally all there. Guilt was grilling my insides and torching my face. My conscious wouldn't let me think beyond the fact that I had recently called a guy, who helped little old ladies with their grocery shopping and pest control problems, a pigheaded jerk and a prick—to his face nonetheless. I won't dare mention the things that I didn't say out loud. _But wasn't I justified in what I said to him?_

No was the answer, and a scripture popped into my head. _Though [you] have all faith, so that [you] could remove mountains, and have not charity, [you are] nothing._ (A/N 1 Corinthians 13:2)

I managed to avoid eye contact with Will the rest of the night even though my nerves were acutely aware of where he was, what he was doing, and what he was saying. He was talking with Kyle and Emily in the kitchen while Ian, Jason, and James were entertaining the giggly girls and me in the media room. When the girls were finally ready to leave, I risked a glance at Will. He must have felt my gaze. Our eyes met, but this time I didn't look away. As we stared at each other, my lips on their own accord (I swear) remembered and relived the aggressive pressure they received from his the other night. I started to sweat. As he made his way toward me, my breathing staggered for a couple beats before accelerating rampantly. Foreign urges and desires rumbled inside me. Fireworks flared in my lower stomach, and…

_Oh, cheese!_ I turned and rushed out the door pushing past people…trying desperately to clear my mind with hymns and primary songs.

I drove Emily, Rebecca, and Katie back to the apartment, and we were silent to begin with. Unfortunately, the silence didn't last long.

"Red…why did you run from Will? He just wanted to talk," Rebecca said.

I didn't say anything.

"I don't think he knew we heard you two outside the apartment the other night," Katie said.

Rebecca snickered, "He still wouldn't know if you would've kept your condolences to yourself."

"Hey, I felt bad for him. The poor guy's trying to apologize, and she runs away. You saw his face. He needed somebody's sympathy. Besides, I think he should know we heard. It's not like the entire ward won't know by Sunday."

As soon as I stopped at the light to turn left, I started bouncing my forehead against the top of the steering wheel.

"The light's green," Emily said laying a comforting hand on my back. "What are they talking about? What happened between you and Will?"

Katie giggled, "Well, on Friday night, while we were watching…"

"Katie, I'll tell her later," I said authoritatively, but she didn't keep her mouth shut.

"I still don't understand why you slapped him," Katie said. "If I were you, I would have gladly kissed him back."

My hand hit the side of my face while Emily cried, "He…you…WHAT?"

Katie was mad that I wouldn't let her hear my narrative. I told her I might email the details to her one day, but that wouldn't appease her. Emily and I ended up locking ourselves in our room, and I started talking with Katie beating on our door saying how unfair it was.

I probably should have told Katie that I wasn't so sure I wanted to relate what happened to Emily to begin with, but after spilling it all to her, I felt a burden lifted. I told her everything…from Will asking me out Friday morning to the call I got from the police officer late that night. I told her about Ian stopping by on Saturday. I even talked about seeing Cooper make out with somebody on Thursday and somebody else four days later. I mentioned what Rex and Mike had said, and lastly, I told her about my embarrassing adventure at Macey's in front of Will that morning.

When I was completely finished, Emily stared blankly at me with her mouth open.

"Well," I swallowed. "Say something."

"And I thought my weekend was…um…thrilling," she said and then started laughing.

"What's so funny?" I snapped.

"Nothing. It's just that… Well, it explains a lot."

"Explains what?"

"Will, for one thing…and Cooper and how edge you've been today, but…" She paused to laugh some more. "Will likes you more than I thought."

"Likes me? He might have liked me, but I doubt he…"

"Listen. Here's how I see it. Will never wanted to fall in love…"

"What? He never…"

"Red, let me finish. He fell in love with you. He didn't want to, but he did."

"He sure had a nice way of showing it."

"Of course. He was trying to hold it back. Deny it…until it blew up in his face. Now, he regrets everything and wants to make it up to you. Even if it is too late, he'll still try." Emily giggled.

"Oh, please! Will wouldn't do that."

"Of course he would, but he's running into a problem."

"What?"

"You're still in denial."

"About what?"

"Sounds like you're planning on forgiving him, right?"

"I'll be damned if I don't."

She laughed. "That's not the best attitude to…"

I rolled my eyes. "I know. I know, but tell me what am I in denial about?"

"You like him."

_Not this again. _"No, I don't. I have never liked him."

She didn't respond verbally. She simply folded her arms and smiled (what I supposed authors called a "knowing" smile, but I was determined she didn't know anything). Yet, I thought of the feelings Will's been stimulating from me lately, and my face heated up.

"If I do feel anything for him, it's all lust," I said. "He's hot. Dang hot. I won't deny that." Emily laughed, and I glared at her as I continued, "But I'm not a hormonal teenager about to give into instinct."

"Are you're saying it's wrong to be physically attracted to someone?"

"No, of course not, but girls shouldn't entertain certain feelings for every hot guy. Especially hot guys you have trouble forgiving."

She smirked. "Certain feelings?"

_Shoot. _I flinched.

The smirk changed to a broad smile. "What were you going to do if you hadn't run from Will earlier? Tackle him? Kiss him ferociously in front of everybody?"

"No, no, no, no!" _Gah, I hope not!_

She collapsed on the floor in heavy laughter. I stepped over her and walked out of the room. In the hallway, I ran into Jenna's and Katie's glares.

"So," Jenna said. "Are you going to tell us what you told Emily?"

"Not now," I said making my way to the kitchen.

"It couldn't be that bad if Emily's laughing about it," Katie said.

"I'm not laughing."

"Oh, come on, Red," Jenna said. "Please?"

"Some other time."

"Promise?"

I marched back into my room without responding…grunting nonsense all the way.

As soon as I walked in, Emily's arms flew around me. "Oh, Red, don't be mad at me. One thing I know for sure…" Her voice was trembling. "I wouldn't be marrying the man of my dreams if it wasn't for you."

"The man of my dreams wouldn't be so easily manipulated." I winced after I said it. Luckily, Emily giggled as she wiped her eyes.

"Will didn't manipulate Kyle. Ian told you. It was a misunderstanding. He…" Emily abruptly stopped speaking, smirked and changed her tone. "Well, Red, that's why I'm in love with Kyle and you're in love with Will."

I groaned and left the room again.

* * *

Graduation was two weeks from Thursday. Final exams were starting a week from Friday. Class projects, papers, review sessions, tutoring, last minute tests, quizzes, and homework filled every minute from early morning to the early hours of the next morning. I'm sure I could have done everything more efficiently and effectively, but honestly, I had trouble focusing. While the droning of professors wore on, while reading a homework problem that wasn't in English (or any English I know), while trying to edit a paper that was crap to begin with, etc. my thoughts would turn to Will Grandison.

I must have relived what went on between us that Friday night a million times, and the more I thought of it the more I regretted how I initially reacted. I'm talking about how I reacted to what he said while I was crying on his shoulder with his arms around me. At that moment, I thought he was just being mean, criticizing my actions, but really he was holding me tightly and protectively as he spoke of the what-if's. Yeah, he sounded mad, but he also sounded like a guy who's upset that the girl he cared for almost got herself hurt…or worse. And what did I do? I yelled at him. Told him to go away. Then, it all went down hill from there.

What I didn't understand, though, was if he did like me or perhaps love me, why didn't he act like it before? I guessed that it might have had something to do with finding out his girlfriend was cheating on him with his sister's fiancé, and I remembered Angela (his other sister) saying that it was the last of three equally bad breakups. I had to admit that I would be cautious the next time I had a crush on a girl if I were him, but still, couldn't I have had a little warning of his feelings toward me? Heck, when he asked me out, he still had to work criticism into the conversation.

However, when he came home from Vegas, he was nice to me. And what did I do? I ran away…like a coward. That's when I knew that between the two of us, he wasn't the only one with problems.

Determined to fully forgive and forget about the whole mess with Will, I officially decided to be nice to him and let him be nice to me. I was nervous about it of course because learning from what he did for his elderly neighbor and for me, he was the type of guy that doesn't ask you if you want something nice done. He just does it. I figured that I'd try the same, but I had no idea what I could do for the son of a multi-millionaire.

Coincidentally, an opportunity presented itself sooner than I expected. While trying to find a parking spot on campus that Wednesday, I notice a white SUV with two large, fresh bird droppings on the windshield. I pulled over and parked to investigate. From the Nevada license plate and knowing that few students drove an Escalade, I figured it was Will's car. I pulled out a couple Wet-ones and paper towels from my back seat (I think my mom stuck them there once) and proceeded to wipe the bird droppings off and clear away the streaks. I could reach one of the poop spots just fine, but for the other one, I stepped on the front bumper, testing first to see that my weight wouldn't break it off.

"Red?"

I screamed and jumped off the bumper. After catching my breath, I managed to say, "Hey, Will."

"Hi."

During the awkward silence that followed, my eyes traveled from his expressionless face to his windshield with one bird dropping still on it and then to the Wet-ones and paper towels in my hands. While I quickly hid my hands behind my back, the corners of his mouth twitched.

"I was just um…vandalizing your car," I said.

"With paper towels?"

"And Wet-ones," I said waving the used ones. "It's a new way I read about on the internet…."

"Oh," he said casually.

We stared at each other for a couple of seconds before a smile grew on his face and I couldn't keep from giggle at my stupid comments and the awkwardness of it all. "I'm almost done," I said pointing to the last bird dropping.

"I'll do it," he said reaching for the cleaning aids in my hands, but I put them behind my back again.

"Why?" _This is my thing._

"I don't have to climb on the hood to reach it," Will said and then quickly turned me around and snatched the wipes and paper towels out of my hands.

"It's not called vandalism if you're helping." I glowered. "Shouldn't you be in class?"

"Yeah," he said while he wiping off the poop.

"Why aren't you?"

"Left something in my car."

"Oh," I said wincing…realizing that it was stupid of me to be mad at him for ruining my chance to be nice to him.

When he was done, he deposited the cleaning aids in a plastic sack in his trunk and pulled out two pieces of poster board. Then he walked toward me. I didn't run this time. Even when he stopped within a few feet from me, I managed to keep my breathing steady and my lower stomach's fluttering at bay although it was a little more difficult when I meet his gaze, his piercing gaze.

Wary that I would in fact run, I figured that I should at least warn him first. "Um…I should get going."

"Red, I'm sorry about Friday."

I looked down at his shoe laces. "Don't worry about it. We both said stuff we shouldn't have."

"You were right, though. Except you forgot to mention that I am a hypocrite," he said taking another step closer to me. "I did exactly what I stopped McCoy from doing the week before."

My lips tingled. _Yeah, how about that kiss. That stupid, unwanted, forceful, moist, squishy, passionate, disgustingly scrumptious kiss. _"Um…well…we all do stuff like that. Uh! I mean! Hypocritical stuff…I mean. I'm sorry I slapped you."

A single corner of his mouth turned up as he shrugged. "It'll make a good story—slapping the guy who gave you your first kiss."

My eyes popped out of their sockets (not really, but it sure felt like it). "Who told you it was my first…"

"Katie mentioned it the other day."

_Gah! Who else! _I took the time to wonder what it'd be like to have the power to squash heads by pressing the thumb and forefinger together while picturing the offender's head. Uncharitable, I know.

"Red, I'm sorry." He said with his standard set jaw and furrowed brow, but this time he wasn't glaring at me. His ridiculously beautiful brown eyes were glistening down on me. "I know it's probably impossible," he went on. "But is there anything I can do to make it all up to you?"

Boys, if you'd like a good example on how to apologize to a girl, um…that's a good one. Be sure to imitate the grave sincerity in his voice and features, and look deeply into the girl's eyes. Having already done some acts of service for her earlier in the week helps as well. Acts put more substance behind your words. This recipe for an apology leaves the girl breathless, speechless, motionless, and mindless in front of you. Well, it did for me anyway. Looking back, I am surprised that I was still standing.

"No," I said after a looooooooooooong pause. "You're good. Um…all's good. I forgive you. I should go. Um…bye." I smiled weakly and left. My legs were still shaky when I started walking up to campus about a half hour later.

Between the hours of 1 and 7 the next morning, my car had been washed clean. Under my windshield wiper was a rose and a note written on a torn piece of notebook paper saying, "Thanks for the lesson in vandalism."


	17. Chapter 16

**A/n**: Thanks for your reviews while I haven't been posting. They've been motivation for me. Thanks.

Chapter 16

I stared at the rose and the note. I stared at them for a good 5 minutes after I had removed them from under my windshield wiper. During that time, my heart must have ran a marathon. I was panting.

No guy had ever given me a rose before.

And who was to give me my first? The guy I slapped last week.

The guy I slapped also washed my car sometime during the night.

Shock, annoyance, bliss, frustration, giddiness, distress…all sprouted, budded, bloomed, and died one right after the other leaving me lightheaded and annoyingly hot as I drove to campus.

He didn't need to be nice. He had already apologized. I accepted and apologized myself. Sort of. Kind of. Not really. _Cheese._

0000000000000000

Cooper emailed to see if I could tutor him that evening which was fine by me. I guess I could have made him join the group I was tutoring at 5 pm. The problem was Lacy, Cooper's ex-friend with benefits, was a part of that group, and remembering her reaction after finding out that I went on a "date" with Cooper…lets just say I wanted to get on Lacy's good side. My fretting about it, however, turned out to be a waste of time. Lacy didn't show. Oh well.

When it was time to start looking for Cooper, I was wondering what my chances were of finding him with the same girl I saw him with earlier that week, a new girl, or no girl at all. So, when I found him with a new one in nearby study room, I shouldn't have been too surprised with what I saw, right? Right. Except that Cooper McCoy was making-out with my roommate.

I threw open the door. "Katie! What are you doing?"

Cooper jumped in his seat and jerked away from Katie, but she didn't seem remotely startled. She simply giggled and said, "What does it look like I'm doing? I found him in the WILK. Isn't he great?"

"I saw him make-out with two other girls this past week, and that's not including you," I cried.

"Mmmmm, practice." She purred and then kissed his cheek. "No wonder you're so good."

I blinked a couple of times. "You did not just say that."

Cooper stared at her smiley face before delayed laughter popped out of him. "What's your excuse?"

"Hmm?" She gently poked his dimple with her finger.

"What makes you so good?"

"Oh," she said, giggling. "I've had a good mentor or two."

He raised an eyebrow. "One or two?"

She shrugged and ran her finger across that eyebrow. "Or five or six."

He smiled and then pressed his lips to hers.

She backed off. "Or ten or twenty."

They looked at each other for a second before breaking into laughter. Then they started making-out again.

"Will you stop?" I said.

"In five minutes," Katie said.

"Why five minutes?" Cooper asked.

"I never go longer than 15."

They paused for kissing.

"No longer than 15 minutes," Cooper said, digesting the words. "Why?"

More kissing.

"Protocol," she said.

"By whose standards?"

"Mine."

"Hmmmm."

Again, more kissing.

_Gross. _"Well, Cooper can't go another five minutes," I said. "We were supposed to have a tutoring session at 6, and believe it or not, I'm crankier when people cancel last minute in the evening than in the morning."

Katie jumped into his lap (if you can believe she wasn't in it already), pulled out a notebook from his bag and stuck a pen in his hand. "He's ready," she cried throwing both arms around his neck. Cooper was biting back a laugh.

"No," I said. "Leave, Katie."

"Party pooper." She murmured as she opened Cooper's phone and started pressing buttons. "So, Cooper, if you ever want a change of pace, give me a call. It'd be fun to do another 15 minutes."

As she walked toward the door, he followed saying, "Roll over minutes?"

"None."

"You sure?"

"Uh-huh."

Kissing.

_Cheese!_

"And you never go over?" he said.

"Never."

"We'll see about that."

More kissing.

I dug my face in my hands.

They continued until an alarm went off. Then Katie took out her cell phone and smiled. "Time's up," she said and left.

For a time, Cooper stayed leaning against the doorpost. After he let out a sigh, he set back down with a goofy smile on his face. "She's...huh." Then he started laughing.

I glared at him.

He opened his cell phone. "You said her name was Katie?"

"I guess what you were doing needed no formal introduction."

"A-A-A-A-K-A-T-I-E," he read from his phone.

"She's put that?"

He was staring at his phone with still that same goofy smile on his face, except the smile now had a wolfish edge to it.

"Be nice," I said. "Don't hurt her or lead her on or…anything."

"You're worried about her?" He raised an eyebrow and glanced briefly out the door before looking back at me. "How do you know you won't be feeling sorry for me when all's said and done?"

"I know Katie. She…"

"You sure you know her?"

_Well? _Having just witnessed how experienced she was at kissing when I thought she was VL or very close to it, I had to admit…"Apparently, I don't know her as well as I thought, but I know you. You…you…"

"I…what," he said.

_You cheated on the girl who was to be your wife,_ I wanted to say, but I lost the gumption. "Nothing," I muttered and then tapped on his statistics book. "We should get going."

He proceeded to shoot out question after question at me, and like always, I was impressed with the caliber of his questions. They also flowed nicely from one topic to another, but when I thought he was going to ask me about the significance test for regression, he said smirking, "So, I heard an interesting story about you passing out and breaking a cabinet door on the way down."

I jumped in my seat, nearly falling out. "WHAT! Who told you?" _Ian!! _"Ian told you, didn't he? The little… Why did he tell you?"

He shrugged, shook his head, and laughed all at once. "He also told me about a slap that lead to a trip to Vegas and a call to an old friend, a mission companion he hadn't spoken to in a while…civilly anyway."

"W-Will called you?"

Cooper smiled. "We caught an Ultimate pick-up game on Tuesday night…just like old times."

"But you cheated on his sister with his girlfriend," I said with surprising ease.

For a moment, he stared at me with a slackened jaw. Then he started to look a little ticked. "You think I'm not sorry about it?"

"I don't see how you guys could make up as if nothing happened."

"We haven't talked in what…11 months? Do you call that making up as if nothing happened?"

"Well uh…no, but still…if I were Will, we would never be anything more than rigidly polite acquaintances from a distance."

"Yeah, but you're not Will Grandison," he said. After a bit of silence between us, he leaned back in his seat and smirked, adding, "You're not Will Grandison with a hot redhead nagging your conscience."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I never thought I'd meet the future Mrs. Grandison."

I rolled my eyes. "You've been talking to Ian way too much."

Cooper shrugged, "I think he's right."

"I don't see how you can say that."

"A guy doesn't wake up at 3 am to wash a girl's car every day."

_Ian is going to pay… _"Okay, say he does like me. Loves me, even, but for me to be Mrs. Grandison, I would have to say 'yes' on several occasions. I have no intention to do so."

"I should warn you, then, up until a year ago, no one could match your Mr. Grandison when it came to wooing. His problem was usually holding on to them once he's got them. I've heard his girlfriends complain about how he rarely apologizes and never admits it when he's wrong, but …I've heard you've changed that."

Knowing it wouldn't do any good to wish this conversation away, I started packing up my things. "Do you have any more stat questions? I should get going."

0000000000000000

On Friday after classes, I ran into Ian Laird in the WILK. At first, I was happy to see him and to hear him yell, ", Red!!!!" from across the bookstore, but then I remembered the things he had to have told Cooper about me with regards to Will.

Ian laughed, "Wow, Red. Why the animosity? I thought we were friends."

"I thought so, too," I said. "Is there anything Cooper McCoy doesn't know about me and Will?"

"Hmmm," he said, looking up thoughtfully. "That's a good question."

"Ian!"

"Ah, Red, Red, Red," he said putting an arm around my shoulder. "Anyone who knows Will…or spent just two minutes talking with the guy…would love what's going on."

"How many people have you told?"

"You know? I'm not sure," he said.

A rush of harsh words begged leave of my mouth, but I ended up saying rather lamely, "You are not my favorite person at the moment."

After laughing a bit at my expense, he said some other things, but I wasn't listening. The candy counter in the middle of the bookstore completely caught my attention. Not that I was having severe candy withdrawals, but there at the candy counter Will and Cooper McCoy were standing next to each other. Laughing.

"What you're witnessing is the miracle of forgiveness," Ian said close to my ear.

"How could he…how could they…" I took a deep breath. "Ian, I know what really happened, and I don't…"

Ian smiled as if I'd just given him a cookie. "So, did Will finally break down and tell you what happened?"

"No. He wouldn't tell me." I said.

"Ah, I was hoping he would. Anyway, amazing, isn't it?" He said looking at Will and Cooper.

"Yes, but how can Will stand talking to him? Forgiveness is great and necessary for salvation and all, but you…you don't invite a thief to dinner after he's robbed you."

Ian sighed. "You know, Red. Sometimes, there are things…events that happen between guys that make other things um…superfluous."

"Things that make backstabbing superfluous?"

"Yeah," Ian smirked. "What's betrayal in the eternal scheme of things? Besides, it wasn't entirely McCoy's fault. I blame it all on Amber 'the Minx' Tomlinson."

"Will's girlfriend."

"Ex," he corrected.

"But Cooper was engaged."

"Yeah." Then he said "Amber" and "Minx" as if he were swearing.

"So, are you going to tell me?" I asked impatiently.

"Tell you what?"

"What makes betrayal superfluous?"

Ian shrugged. "You'd think I'd know, but I've only heard rumors about a knife fight, lots of bleeding, miracles, and stinky fish. I don't think anyone's heard anything first hand from either of them besides their mission president…and their parents."

"A knife fight?"

"A knife fight."

"You're not going to tell me more?"

"No."

"No?"

Ian laughed. "Maybe if I was thirty years older and female, I would."

Not feeling up to giving Ian the reproof he deserved, I turned toward Will and Cooper once more. Another guy I didn't recognize had joined them, and they seemed to be doing nothing, but laughing. I marveled at Will's countenance. If I hadn't seen him teach in Sunday School, I wouldn't have recognize him. I'd never seem him look so…so happy other than when he taught every other Sunday.

"If I'd known a slap in the face was all it'd take, I would have hit Will a long time ago," Ian said.

"What?" I said snapping my head in his direction.

"But I don't think my slap would have had the right balance of physical and psychological pain."

Before I could get him to explain what the heck he was implying, we heard a "Hey, Laird! What's up, man?" coming from that guy with Cooper and Will.

Ian tugged me by the wrist as he walked toward them. The new guy and Cooper were smiling as we approached although I noticed Cooper glace briefly at Will.

When Will saw us, his countenance dimmed slightly, and maggoty awkward feelings swelled in my stomach.

"I should go," I said.

"Come on! You know you want to," Ian whispered, tugging me all the more.

"No, I really should go," I said hopping that my eyes were pleading enough and my attempts at freeing my wrist from his hand were inconspicuous enough.

"Fine, Red. Fine." Ian said, laughing. "But I think more social interaction would be healthy for you two. Might relief some of the tension."

"Thanks, but no thanks," I said and turned the other way.

I didn't think I would regret leaving, but I did about ten minutes later. It was when I was walking out the Talmage double doors toward the faculty parking lot. I regretted giving up the opportunity to thank Will for washing my car. I admitted to myself that it was a nice thing for him to do. My car definitely needed it. In fact, I couldn't remember the last time I washed it.

Then I thought about what Ian said and what Cooper said until I couldn't handle my rising thermostat and the merciless knotting in my lower stomach anymore. I started to wonder if it was possible for one's burning face to flash on and off like a broken traffic light in sync with one's pulse.

That's when I heard a "Hey, can you do me a favor?" I looked up and saw a guy, who was obviously not handicapped, shutting a door of a car parked in a handicapped spot. The first thing I noticed about the guy was his smile that showed off the hard work of an orthodontist and whitening strips. The next thing I noticed as he jogged toward me was a pair of sparkling, laughing eyes—eyes that I'd never forget.


	18. Chapter 17

Author's Note: Home Teachers are two guys assigned to check in with a family, make sure they're doing okay, and give them a spiritual thought once a month. At BYU, Home Teachers are assigned to apartments.

I shuddered. It was him …the sparkly eyed stranger…the guy I saw late last Friday who offered me a ride home…the guy Will had me report to the police…the guy the police wanted me to report in if I ever saw him again. I swear the do-do-do-do "Twilight Zone" music started playing somewhere.

He was speaking to me, but his words were like birds flying into glass doors. Not penetrating. I caught the phrases "illegally parked" and "turn in paper," and something I did or didn't do prompted him to smile, hand me his car keys, thank me, and leave. I stared at him open mouthed as he ran off through the Talmage doors.

Did I mention he gave me his car keys?

I scanned around me for a reason, any possible reason I could be holding this sparkly-eyed stranger's car keys. Two things caught my attention. A cop was parked in the parking lot, and the sparkly-eyed guy, who was obviously not handicapped, was parked in a handicapped spot…so…I guessed he wanted me to move his car if the cop asked me to?

_Weird._ The weirdness didn't stop me from writing down the guy's license plate number, though.

In seconds, I heard the Talmage doors open. "Thank you!" he said a little breathlessly from running, and he gave me the biggest charming smile I'd ever seen off the big screen. Then he said, "Thank you," again as if he owed me eternal gratitude. Eternal servitude, even. If we were living in a different century, I'm sure that he would have kissed my hand. I held out his car keys for him to take, and he took them with one hand and shook my hand with his other, an exchange learned from receiving certificates from the bishop growing up.

Then, he was looking at me more intently than before. His smile had lessened somewhat, but his eyes still twinkled. "Do I know you?"

Can we say…quandary? I stuffed his license plate number further in my pocket.

"Um. I believe I've run into you before," I said in a shaky voice.

He continued to look at me. "Are you in engineering?"

I shook my head.

He was about to say something else when a driver of a handicap marked car with its windows rolled down was saying some colorful things about people parking where they don't belong. Sparkly-eyed stranger quickly thanked me again, jumped in his car, and drove off, and I released the breath I didn't know I was holding.

I took a shaky step toward the police car. The police did want me to tell them if I ever saw him again, but as I got closer to the car, I felt funnier and funnier about turning in a guy who trusted me, some random girl, to hold his keys and move his car if needed. Walking away from the police car wasn't any easier. What was the right thing to do? Call the police later? Forget about it? The sparkly-eyed stranger trusted me. A criminal isn't usually a trusting sort of person, but what if he really was a bad guy?

_Cheese!_

It wasn't until I had sat down for a nice cheap meal that I finally got the gumption to make a decision. I called the police and reported the license plate number. What would it hurt? If the guy was innocent, the guy was innocent. If the guy was guilty as sin, he would get what was coming. The police would handle it, and I could eat my dinner in peace.

But peace never came. Why didn't either alternative sit well? Was there another option I never considered?

The telephone rang.

Before I even said "Hello," I heard a "Could I use your ironing board?" Interestingly, I knew who it was instantly without having ever heard his voice on the phone before.

There was no "Hi, Red. This is Will. Blah, blah, blah." There was no meaningless chit-chat to give me time to get used to the idea I was talking to him on the phone and no such banter full of hints of why he called.

No. There was only a ridiculously random request.

Well…come to think of it…I don't think I would have reacted any differently if he said, "Hi, it's Will. What's up!" I would have gasped and dropped the phone anyway.

As the phone clanked on the kitchen floor, I rebuked myself in third person. Then, I cringed. Will probably heard me.

"Sorry about that," I said. "I uh…what did you say?"

"I was wondering if I could use your ironing board."

I still couldn't believe what I was hearing. "A what?"

"An ironing board. Do you have one?"

"Yeah, we have one."

Then there was this silence I wasn't sure how to fill until Will said, "So…can I use it?"

"Our ironing board?"

"Yeah," he said.

"What happened to yours?"

"Ian took it sledding."

I expected more explanation from him, but got silence instead. "I take it the ironing board didn't survive."

"No," he said.

There was another silence until Will sighed and said, "Can I come over and use your ironing board?"

"Have you asked your Home Teachers if you could use theirs?"

"Red-"

"I think they should be the first people you ask."

"Red, do you remember a conversation we had a couple weeks ago with Katie?"

I didn't know what point he was trying to make, but I was determined to make mine. "If Home Teaching worked like it should, there would be no reason for-"

"Red," Will cut in. "Do you really think a single guy should call his home teachers when he could ask a girl if he could use hers?"

"You could buy one. They couldn't cost too much. $10? $20?"

He inhaled and exhaled rather loudly. "Red, can I come over?"

_Cheese. _I closed my eyes and rubbed my cheeks, eyes, forehead. If I said no, life would be easier. Otherwise, I foresaw nothing, but awkwardness from being in the same room with the guy doing his ironing. _The guy is hot, though._

I shook _that_ thought away, but then my eyes focused on a magnet on the fridge. It read, "What would Jesus do?" _Cheese._

If I didn't feel comfortable, He'd understand, right?

If a different person was asking to come over, I bet the Lord would have understood my rejection, but in this circumstance, I felt that there was a right and wrong thing to do assuming I understood the spirit right. _Grow up, Kerstin. It's time to grow up._

I covered the receiver on the phone and hit my forehead on the fridge twice before saying, "Yeah. Come over."

"You sure?"

"Y-yeah?"

He laughed. "You're already regretting it."

"Just come over."

And he did…bearing hangers and an enormous wad of white dress shirts. After I told him where everything was, he set himself up to iron. I sat at the kitchen table and glued my eyes to my homework, and I studied fairly well until I noticed Will had stopped working through the corner of my eye. He was looking at something near me. I couldn't tell what at first until I noticed the rose he had given me in a glass of water sitting on the kitchen table for the world to see.

"Where did you get the flower," he asked, over-doing the appearance of indifference.

I sat up straighter in my seat and tried to ignore my burning cheeks. "A guy gave it to me."

"Oh," he said hanging up a finished shirt on our closet door handle.

"He washed my car."

"Hmm," he said, picking up another shirt.

"I never wash my own car."

"I'm not surprised."

I raised my chin. "Guys do it for me."

"Really?"

_Wow unto the liar, for he shall be thrust down to…_ "I get my little brother to do it."

"And he's not around."

"He's on a mission."

"Do you have anything against car washes?"

"I'm a college student with no job on the horizon…yet."

"You could ask the guy who gave you that flower to take you…and your car," he said, ironing. "I don't think he'd mind." He looked up briefly with an odd sort of smile on his face.

I lowered my eyes. The picture of him and me alone in my car at a car wash didn't sit well in my lower stomach. I stood up, got myself a tall glass of water, and drank the water as slowly as I could before sitting back down. Even then, I didn't look at him. I closed one text book and opened another trying hard to focus, but I wasn't seeing anything.

"You know your book's upside down," he said.

_Cheese! _I rubbed my face in my hands and let out a laugh. I don't remember being more mad at myself…at least not since I five putting on the last hole at my last regular season golf tournament.

As he was ironing, He was grinning wider than I've ever seen him grin, and when he look up at me, I almost choked on my own saliva. Will…his eyes, they looked so bright…so soft. So not like Will.

I jumped when the front door opened. Katie and Cooper came in. Based on the cheery hellos and what's ups, the only awkwardness in the room was felt by me and me alone.

After some small talk with Will, Cooper looked down at all the shirts Will had brought to iron, smiled and started saying stuff in Swedish. I had a pretty strong feeling that Cooper was talking about me unless they were talking about the actual color red. I didn't understand much more of what Cooper was saying, but Will responded with a "it worked" in Swedish and a smile.

"What worked," I asked.

Cooper's and Will's heads snapped in my direction and said nothing for a bit.

Cooper smirked. "I was just making fun of his newly found appreciation for ironing."

"Never knew it could open so many doors," Will said smiling at a shirt he was hanging up on a door post.

"You didn't answer my question," I said.

Katie giggled and put an arm around me. "Sorry, guys. Red's a little dense sometimes."

Words failed me.

Someone knocked at the door and Jenna, apartments 4 and 14 and some other people I recognized from the ward flooded into our apartment, bearing the latest new releases from Netflix.

"Oh, why can't you watch'em somewhere else," I cried.

The room quieted and stared at me, and my face grew hot.

Katie, again, put her arm around me. "Um…Red…our TV's the biggest." She paused to let it sink in before saying to everyone else in the room, "No offence." Everyone indicated none was taken and acknowledged it was the truth.

"Oh. Right. You guys just go ahead. Forget I said anything," I said lightly while I wished once again to have the power to wipe memories clean. As talking and laughter started again, I rushed to my room, grabbed my bag, stuffed my books in to it, and left the apartment fully intending to go to the library to study.

An annoying environmental phenomenon stopped me.

Rain.

_Cheese!_

But you know what they say in Utah. If you don't like the weather, wait five minutes. It'll change.

After a couple of minutes, the rain turned into hail.

I was practicing every anger management technique I could think of when the door opened. As the sound of chattering voices shut off and the sound of clanging hangers drew near, every nerve from hair to toe stood on end.

Out of politeness, I smiled at Will. As he smiled in return, he leaned one shoulder against the wall and hung the shirts over the other one, a perfect statue of peace and tranquility. I, on the other hand, was unconsciously doing my best impression of a chattering windup toy.

I threw my hands up in the air and cried, "Why can't I relax around you?"

"I'd like to know, too." Will laughed.

"If you think I'd discussed why with you…" I said shaking my finger at him. "Think again, Mr. Grandison."

"I know a possible cure."

I folded my arms. "What?"

"We should date."

"Date?" I didn't feel comfortable with his solution. "You don't think avoiding each other would work?"

"If you didn't like me," Will said shrugging. "But you do."

"Ha-ha-ha!" The laugh sounded weak, so I added a "You think I like you?" for good measure.

"No, I know you do," he said. Then he smiled, leaned close to my ear, and whispered, "And the attraction's mutual."

That's when the hail stopped.

I swallowed, grab the hangers from his hand, and started walking toward his car. I knew I had to admit defeat. He followed close behind me, and after he unlocked his car with a button on his key chain, I hung up some of the shirts on a hook and draped the bigger ones over the seat. I froze. Not all the shirts were the same size.

I cleared my throat. "Will, how many of these shirts are yours?"

"Four," he said.

"Four out of ten."

"Yeah."

My eyes widened. I shut his car door, leaned against it, and looked everywhere, but at him.

"What's on your mind?" he said.

I swallowed. "You think we should date?"

"Yes," he said.

"But I need to study."

"So do I."

My left leg started twitching. "Well…if you're studying and I'm studying…"

"You want to study together?"

I looked at him and shook my head. "I wouldn't get anything done."

Will smiled. "Neither would I."

My cheeks grew warm, but luckily, my mind kept working...mostly. "You'll want to eat."

Will raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"After hours of studying, you'll get hungry…around 6:00."

"Really?"

"I'll be hungry, too"

"Interesting."

I nodded. "And you'll pick me up on the second floor of the library next to the world map."

"I will?"

"Of course," I said with more confidence than I felt.

Will laughed, kissed my cheek, and said, "See you tomorrow at 6."


End file.
